Dialectic Tension

The good of inconvenience

2011-11-28T11:17:00.001-08:00

The say death comes in threes – if that’s the case, I’m good for a while. I’ve taken part, in one way or another, in three funerals in the last few weeks.

As a pastor, I get a unique view of these events. I get called to the hospital to sit with a man as he watches his wife pass away. I get called by a family when their loved-one who has been battling cancer for years finally ends the battle. I get to sit with my wife when a close family friend passes away.

I also get to be the one to proclaim a word of hope in the midst of sorrow. I get to be the one that asks the difficult questions about what scriptures were important in a loved one’s life.

I get to be the one who witnesses love shared by friends and families. I get to be the one who watches loved ones laugh and cry as they remember their love one who has just passed away.

I also get a lot of quiet time to watch and contemplate death.

At a recent funeral I was talking with the funeral director about that very fact. I think more than anyone funeral directors contemplate death since they face it every day – not in an unhealthy way (though for some it may be) but in a way that they are constantly reminded that we all are on a journey in life and no matter what science discovers and finds there is no changing the fact that our journey through this world ends in death.

As I thought about death recently I discovered how very inconvenient it tends to be.

Death doesn’t wait for us to make all of our arrangements. Death doesn’t make sure our calendar is clear of other engagements. Death doesn’t allow us to make travel plans in enough time to get the best discounts and rates. Death doesn’t always allow for us to say goodbye to those we love and care about.

Yet, in the face of the inconveniences of death, we drop the less important and replace them with the more important. We drive across country to be with the ones we love. We cancel appointments and pass on opportunities that conflict with the scheduling of funerals. We don’t worry about the details, there’s always tomorrow for that. We simply run to the people that are important to us and we spend time with them – often doing nothing more than sitting together and being present.

As I think about it, maybe the best thing that death does for us is help us to re-prioritize our lives. It helps us to finally say no to things that we don’t really need to be part of. It helps us to remember that family and friends are important and they won’t always be with us.

In a 24/7 world where the stores are open for our every whim, where our calendars are beyond full because of all of the “important” things we need to accomplish, it is probably good for death to enter our lives at inconvenient times to remind us that being inconvenienced is good.

Life, death, and Christ’s Resurrection

2011-05-02T10:52:00.001-07:00

Since Easter Sunday I have been given many opportunities to ponder life and death. It seems to be all around us. With the spring season comes new life – animals are born into nature, trees and flowers bloom, people are invigorated by the changing season. It seems logical that the Christian church celebrates Easter in just such a setting because of the new birth that comes to us in Christ’s resurrection.

In the midst of this newness of life, we still encounter the inevitable reality of death. On Wednesday massive storms ripped through the Southeast leaving many dead in their wake. Houses were destroyed, personal property damaged, limbs ripped from trees. The fragile new life in nature met nature’s most powerful force.

Over the weekend I was informed of multiple deaths that touched our congregation. One was a pastor who had served here as an interim minister a number of years ago, the other was a man who as a child had been a charter member of the congregation. Both had lived very full and meaningful lives and were called home to be with God leaving in their absence family members trying to make sense of a new way of living.

Last night I became aware of the news that Osama Bin Laden had been killed by US Forces. I’m not sure what my reaction to such news is. Bin Laden has certainly been behind his share of terror and inhumane action, but does that give someone else the right (or duty) to take his life? As I ponder this question, I recall Dietrich Bonhoeffer and his role in the failed plot to assassinate Hitler. Reflecting on his role Bonhoeffer writes:

"the ultimate question for a responsible man to ask is not how he is to extricate himself heroically from the affair, but how the coming generation shall continue to live."

"when a man takes guilt upon himself in responsibility, he imputes his guilt to himself and no one else. He answers for it...Before other men he is justified by dire necessity; before himself he is acquitted by his conscience, but before God he hopes only for grace."

“the blood of martyrs might once again be demanded, but this blood, if we really have the courage and loyalty to shed it, will not be innocent, shining like that of the first witnesses for the faith. On our blood lies heavy guilt, the guilt of the unprofitable servant who is cast into outer darkness.”

I can only wonder what is currently going through the minds of those who were ordered to carry out the killing of Bin Laden. I can only wonder what goes through the mind of President Obama as he considers his role in bringing a man to death. I can only wonder what the real ramifications of this very visible death will be.

I imagine that Bin Laden might be the criminal who was hung to die next to Jesus. I’m not sure if he is the criminal who asked Jesus to remember him or if he is the criminal who derided the one who asked Jesus to remember him. But I trust that if even Osama Bin Laden asked Jesus to remember him in the Kingdom, Jesus’ answer would be, “today, you will be with me in paradise.”

Good Friday

2011-04-22T14:48:00.001-07:00

In a rare move on my part, I actually wrote out the entire manuscript of my sermon for the Good Friday service (yes, I seem to have channeled a bit of Rob Bell’s formatting style). I have included it here:

Good Friday, April 22, 2011

John 18 -19:42

I remember sitting in the pews of the church I grew up in.

I can vividly see the sunlight cascading through the skylight.

I recall the honey-oak finish of the pews, their hardness that somehow seemed comfortable.

I can hear the call of the organ from the speakers behind the “faux” pipes on the walls.

I could tell you which pew “belonged” to our family – we sat there every week – until they removed it to make room for the “music loft”.

I remember the Pastors who led worship – they would enter from the back, with regal formality which later gave way to a casual reverence, dressed in their robes.

I remember the beautiful paraments that stretched from floor to ceiling – 40-feet in the air!

I can see myself sitting there through the years, singing hymns, listening to prayers, watching the “family” that I grew up around telling the story of Jesus.

I remember how practices changed over time.
How the Communion Elements which used to be processed to the altar with the offering started appearing on the altar when worship began
How the men who used to all wear suits began losing the jacket, then dressing in slacks and polos and then jeans
How the acolytes used to light different candles at different times of the service then they began lighting them all at the same time.

And none of it had any real meaning.

It was all just stuff

Until

Good Friday

I was maybe 7 years old.

I don’t remember what the pastor said,
all I remember is my reaction.

I remember crying uncontrollably.
Weeping.

I remember my mom reaching down to ask me what was wrong –

- I couldn’t answer her,
I didn’t know how to answer her

All I know is that at that moment I realized

JESUS DIED FOR ME

Not nameless humanity

It didn’t matter that Jesus died for my parents, my brother, my friend Jim, for Shirley, Dick, or Pat

JESUS DIED FOR ME

The colors of the worship center can fade from my memory, but I will always know deep in my heart that Jesus Died for me

Until we own our relationship with our Saviour, the one who died on a cross for us, we can easily get caught up in a lot of attitudes, a lot of details, a lot of stuff.

We think that the color of the carpet makes a difference.

We think that by dropping some food in the box for the food pantry we’ve done enough to help the hungry.

We think that our translation of the Bible is the only one.

We feel hassled when we are asked to donate clothes and blankets for the homeless.

We think that music of our preferred style is the most important.

We think that if people don’t agree, then they are going to hell, or at least not to the same heaven we are

We think that by paying taxes that provide a hospital we’ve done enough for the sick.

But when we own our relationship with our Saviour, all of that STUFF drifts away.

When we own our relationship with our Saviour, our attitudes change.

When we realize that Jesus Christ died on a cross for YOU and ME, not a nameless humanity, nothing else matters – and we begin to live differently.

When we come to terms with the idea that Jesus cares enough for each individual that he
knows us by name,
knows what food we like,
knows what color we like,
knows the good we’ve done,
and also knows the times we failed
and despite all of that – CHOSE to die anyway
we look at the world differently.

It fundamentally changes WHO we ARE and HOW we live.

Some may call them rose colored glasses.
And maybe that is true
– because when we take the crucifixion seriously our vision is stained
by the blood of Jesus who was willing
to take our place on a cross so that we don’t have to experience
the full pain,
the full suffering,
the full shame
or the full humiliation of our sin.

And we begin to live in a way that proclaims a hope that no one else has to either.

Amen.

a little self-respect

2010-12-07T13:03:00.001-08:00

I have to admit, I’m probably among the world’s worst proofreaders. I think it’s partly that I get bored with looking for the details and try to grasp just the essence of what I am trying to say. Maybe it’s that because I know what I’m trying to say I breeze past the idea that I might not actually be saying it. But, I think if anyone is going to post something on a blog or a newsletter of some sort a little bit of self-respect dictates that proofreading is necessary.

This comes to mind today as I read a blog, linked from a newsletter that I read regularly, that had countless typos and errors in it. In some cases I would have thought that spellcheck might have alerted the writer to the issues, in other cases simply reading the document a second time would have helped.

Maybe I’m just out of touch with the “technology generation” (is that what we want to call people who have lived their whole lives connected to the internet?) and the need to communicate using the correct words and decent grammar is passé. But when I get distracted by the errors, I have to think that communication is getting lost.

I’m not sure that my opinion really matters. I’m sure most people in the world don’t care. But there, I shared my thoughts, and you apparently read them, so from here on, I will do my part to do my duty to use good grammar and spell words as correctly as I can.

Inside the mind of a Pastor

2010-10-24T10:34:00.001-07:00

This morning while I was worshipping I was thinking that it would be really wonderful for members of the church (and general public) to get a glimpse into the thought process that goes on in my mind in the midst of worship. This thought hit me because there were a number of profound thoughts that came about but then left about as quickly as they showed up.

Worship at Gloria Dei starts with this wonderful tradition of the choir singing from the hallway just outside our sanctuary (since the space is small it works – for those in larger congregations it might not work as well). This is a most unique time for me because it usually comes as a moment of quiet contemplation right on the heels of a lot of laughter and casual conversation with folks arriving for worship. This moment helps to focus my mind as I begin to consider what is about to happen. Sometimes the particular chorus that is sung brings thoughts to my mind about what I’m about to say or do – other times it is just a moment of peace before the “storm”.

When I enter the worship space a million thoughts rattle through my brain, what page are we on, is everyone here, hope the choir gets seated without incident, did I turn off the toaster oven this morning? I’m sure these are the same thoughts that go through people’s minds as they sit in the pew were I to interview them.

What strikes me is that in any given morning a line to a hymn or a phrase from a prayer or scripture may strike me in a particularly meaningful way. These are the moments that I really wish the congregation had a window into my brain – obviously these are very wise statements that need to be shared, but usually by the end of the prayer, hymn, or scripture reading my brain has moved on to something else – so maybe it’s not as important as I thought. Or maybe it’s the first of several times I will think that thought and I will remember later – at a more appropriate time – the thought and share it with people.

Yes, there are moments I wish people could know my thoughts. Then I am reminded that God knows my every thought and maybe it is important that these thoughts stay in my brain and between me and God. Maybe it is our conversation in the midst of worship meant just for me. Hmmm ….

Ain’t technology grand?

2010-10-05T12:23:00.000-07:00

I have to admit, I’m not one of those technology people who jumps on the latest craze the moment is released. In fact, I’m one who sits back and watches and wonders as others try out new things, lament about all of the issues and then I slowly but surely embrace technology once it is firmly established.

I recall being a little slow on the CD band wagon. I just wasn’t sure I wanted to be shelling out $15 for my favorite artist on a digital disc when $9 for that cassette was working just fine. But eventually I jumped on board and my wife will attest that it has been a landslide ever since (if anyone has ideas for how to store over 1000 CDs let me know – because I’m not getting rid of those discs now that I have them). I was slow onto the cell phone scene and finally have allowed myself to go the route of the smart phone and am trying to figure out how to justify the data plan that goes with the new smart phones.

But here’s the thing … every time I do finally embrace new technology I LOVE IT!!

Today I sit in my office setting up my new work computer and it is phenomenal! Now, I didn’t get anything too exciting, and it is still day one (oh, the issues are bound to come) and yes I did curse a little as I couldn’t figure out why the wireless connection wasn’t happening (until I learned about this cool little button that did it all for me), but now that I’m relaxing a little and testing things out I’m finding all kinds of cool features. Like this button that lets me update my blog easily! WOW – this is why I haven’t been updating up until now, because it was too much work (yeah, right, the novelty of this button will wear off soon enough and I’ll go back to not writing very often – you just wait and watch).

I wonder if that’s how our faith life is? We hear a great sermon, we see a great concert, we do something that gets us all excited but then the newness wears off and we’re back to square one. How can we keep things fresh and new in our faith life? Well, reading the Bible for one. Going to worship, involving ourselves in fellowship for another. Serving others. There are tons of ways, we just have to commit to keeping things fresh! And the best part of keeping our faith life fresh is that it doesn’t come at the cost of a new phone or a new computer (or whatever the latest techno gadget is).

Training

2010-06-15T11:34:00.001-07:00

Allow me to first say that I've been meaning to update this blog much more often than I have, but alas life seems to have put this on the low end of my priority list. I'm hoping to remedy that by making this blog a part of my work when I get a job in a church - hopefully soon. I could explain all the things that have gone on in the last months that have kept me from blogging, but I'm pretty sure no one wants to read that - if you do, let me know - I'll put it on my to-do list.

I was spurred to write today by a response that I got to an earlier post. Responses are cool because they remind me that people do actually read my thoughts and once in a while some of those people even like or are challenged by what I have to say.

As I was considering the subtitle of my blog, I thought about the word TRAINING. Originally it made it into the subtitle because I was attending seminary and it seemed presumptuous to consider myself something other than in training. Now that I've graduated the reality that I will always be in training is much more realistic to me. I realize that I will never know all that I want to know about any given subject and that I will always want to learn more about something. So I decided that rather than adjusting the subtitle, I will keep it as both a reminder to who I am and a challenge to who I want to be.

I assure you (and my friends will attest) that most of my training in the future will not be happening in a classroom, it will be happening in "the world." It's not that I don't value education, it's just that I'm tired of it - I want to learn by having conversations with people. I want to learn by experiencing the world around me. I want to learn by (and this is hard at times) making mistakes and then picking up the pieces and moving forward.

So, here's to being in training - hopefully forever. (and maybe to updating my blog more than once in the next six months).

What are You Willing to Die For?

2009-09-20T22:14:00.000-07:00

Over the past few months this question has been hanging in my head. Sometimes at the front other times deep in the recesses, but it is a question that I've been pondering of late, "what are you willing to die for?"

The question first presented itself when I was preparing to show the film Bonhoeffer at my internship site. As part of the screening we invited community members to have conversation after the film. This was the question that I used to entice viewers - and it worked. We drew a large crowd of people intrigued by the film and the conversation. Ultimately no one answered the question for themselves, but for Bonhoeffer it was clear that he felt it was worth going to the gallows for his belief that Hitler was wrong!

This reminds me that a friend of mine, upon learning I was planning to attend seminary, said, "I would ask a pastor of any church I would attend one question. If you were alive during the holocaust would you have stood up for the Jews?" It's a tough question. My answer was, "I would like to think that I would have." But would I have really done so?

It got me thinking about our modern day - are there any issues that I would be willing to bet my life on? Issues that I feel so passionately about that I would face certain death over. I'm pretty sure right now, the answer is "very few." I would stake my life on my faith in Christ, but it's not like that will get me killed in the U.S. I would put my life on the line to save my family. But somehow that is not the same as what Bonhoeffer stood for.

In the last few weeks I watched the Epic films Gods and Generals and Gettysburg. As I watched these films, I was captured by a few themes that seemed to be central to the story that was being told. One was that the faith of these people was real and lived - they read their Bibles and quoted scripture in ways that I've not heard anyone do in my lifetime. Two (which is really the more important point to this post) was that they were willing to stand for their cause even though it meant facing certain death.

I recall a scene early in Gods and Generals where a family was gathered to send their young boys (probably teenagers) to serve in the army. There was no doubt in that scene that the mother was not expecting to ever see those boys again. Contrast that to how we send our military out today - we send them out with this assurance that they WILL return ... and most do ... but they certainly don't return unchanged (that's another topic for another day - and probably another writer).

I was also taken by the battle scenes of Gettysburg. Mostly it was the final battle scene where General Armistad essentially told General Robert E. Lee in no uncertain terms that Lee's decision to attack the Union soldiers was foolish and would mean the annihilation of the Confederate forces. Lee of course ordered Armistad to lead his troops into battle anyway. And Armistad did. And sure enough, it happened just as he predicted, the Confederate troops were annihilated. (this scene reminded me why I would not make a good soldier ... I would have continued to question Lee's logic on leading soldiers into certain death).

These were but a few of the scenes that kept me asking the question, "what am I willing to die for" and beyond that "what is this generation willing to die for"?

I think there is a grand sense of entitlement among those of us who are under 40 ... maybe even under 50 ... that somehow by our birthright we should have all that we want and more! We snub our noses at the political process and talk about how broken it is without attempt to do anything to fix it. We are against everything but don't offer a legitimate alternative to anything. We assume "it will all work out."

I write "we" because I sense in myself that this might very well be how I've lived my life for all of these years. I'm not sure what it will take to change it. What catalyst will get those of us who have had a "good life" to get our dander up and fight for what we believe in or what we want in our lives? What will truly be the issue that I will risk all that I am for?

For Jesus Christ, it was humanity. He staked his entire life on saving humanity. And because he paid the price, we certainly reap the rewards!

Thoughts, reflections, stories, and a commitment to blog

2009-08-20T09:26:00.000-07:00

Well, if you've been reading this blog since it's inception you know that I've gone through times of writing a lot to a real dry spell these last few months. It's not that I haven't had anything to say, it's just that, well, I guess I haven't thought "gee, I should write that down on my blog."

Recently I've been doing a lot of reflecting as I draw to the end of a year of internship in what I count to be one of the greatest experiences of my life. As I think about the past year I thought "gee, I should write some of these thoughts down" and then thought "but what would I do with them, who would read them, what purpose would it serve?"

Yes, self-doubt can get the best of us sometimes and paralyze us from action, but I'm committing to overcome this paralysis and just write and worry about the rest later. Sometimes I will develop full thoughts other times I might just throw some ideas on the page and see if they stick. As for my "paralysis questions" well, if you're reading, that answers the "who" and if you get something out of my writing that answers the "why" and if nothing else getting these thoughts off of my brain on onto a computer will serve to open space in my brain for more important thoughts like the average wing speed of a swallow (I'll debate African or European when I have the brain space). And in the end if no one reads a word that I've written, well, it's been a good exercise for me and at least I'll have these thoughts in one location that I can go back to later.

There are a few themes that have been running through my brain that deserve full articles to themselves. Love, Thankfulness, Privilege (which I'm sure I've written about before), Story, transition, oh, the list could go on (and hopefully it will or I will run out of things to write). I hope to write at length about these things in the coming weeks.

There are songs that have been running through my brain lately too, probably because they have lyrics that touch on these various topics. One song that has been hanging with me a while now is one written by a friend of mine who happens to be the worship leader here at Saint Matthew ... in the song he writes, "We have been blessed, now we want to be a blessing"

That single line resonates with me so loudly because I think about the places where I have been a blessing to others and I realize that it generally flows out of some experience of being blessed myself. And what a vicious cycle that creates because when I bless someone, they tend to bless me in return and I bless them they bless me and so on! But how humbling to think about being a link in that chain!

Last night Stephanie and I watched the finale of "Top Chef Masters" and something that Stephanie mentioned was the humility of Rick Bayless who went on to win the competition. The whole "Masters" show stood in stark contrast to the "Top Chef" show where the "up and coming" chefs try to show their prowess because of this concept of humility. Those that are "up and coming" seem to have to assert themselves and they tend to do so by stepping on and stepping over others (and often the drama that ensues in the show is due to the attitude of a young chef trying to show-up one of the more experienced judges), but in the "Masters" competition it was simply about doing one's best and letting their work shine and in some cases, lending a hand to their fellow competitor. We can all learn a lot from this insight.

It's NOT Tragic

2009-06-26T10:12:00.000-07:00

I don't want to seem cold-hearted or calloused, but Michael Jackson has been dead less than 24-hours and I've had enough already. When I first heard the news yesterday it was on the radio as I was driving home from a meeting. It was nice to hear about it, but the DJ went on for about 3 minutes (which is a long time on radio) babbling endlessly about how just didn't know what to say. Then don't say anything!

It might surprise us to learn that according to the "CIA Factbook" over 6,700 people die each day. Why do we not stop and think about the fact when we invest hours of our days, weeks, and lives into "mourning" the death of a famous person that we don't really know.

I admit, it is sad. But it is sad when anyone dies. But why do we think that the death of Michael Jackson (or Farah Fawcett or Ed McMahon for that matter) is any more newsworthy than any other death? Did I know any of these people? NO. I may have known of them, but I didn't know them. Never met them. Never even saw them in person. Why should their death cause me to want to immortalize them forever?

I should probably point out that my rant here is not in particular against Michael Jackson or the media, but against our society that seems to have valued celebrity over real relationship. Every time a celebrity dies we get this media frenzy and people who flock to create memorial shrines to these people we never even knew.

Misuse of the word tragic. I could probably rant for days and weeks (and likely someone has a blog somewhere to this point) about the misuse of the English language. But if one more media person uses the word "tragic" to describe Michael Jackson's death, I'm going to scream! Sad, yes. Surprising, yes. Unexpected, yes. Heartbreaking, I'll give you that one. Unfortunate, yes. BUT NOT TRAGIC. I believe that "tragic" is a word that should be reserved for events of great magnitude. Major accidents, natural disasters, calamitous situations (as one dictionary defines it), events that massively alter events going forward. Michael Jackson's death, though sad, heartbreaking, and surprising was NOT tragic! As a matter of fact, death has your number and my number and will get us all in the end whether we like it or not. Death is inevitable!

What is tragic gets back to the others of the 6,700 people who died yesterday. Some of those people were surrounded by loved ones, others died suddenly and unexpectedly, others died after a long battle with disease, still others died alone with no one around. Tragically the loss of those people to the world goes largely unnoticed. Yes, their friends and their families generally notice (I say generally because for a few of these people they do not have these ties, which is the greatest tragedy of all) but they don't get their picture on the front page of the newspaper, they don't even get an article in the front section. If they are lucky a newspaper will provide space for them in the obituary section, but only if a family member writes something to be included.

Maybe I'm just bitter because I'm not a celebrity, but somehow I don't think that is it. I think it comes down to this worship of celebrity that seems to envelope our society. Were it not for photographs we wouldn't have a clue who these people are (See Shane Hipps "Flickering Pixels" for an elaborate explanation of that statement) and yet we pretend that these people had a personal relationship with us and that their death somehow impacts how we live our everyday life. I've gotta be honest, when I woke up this morning, the fact that Michael Jackson is dead didn't make me do anything differently though the death of Millie still hung in my mind.

Who's Millie you ask? Millie was one of the members of my congregation who passed away on Sunday at the age of 93. Millie is one of the 6,700 who didn't get her picture on the front page of the paper, but is missed by many friends and family.

Good Friday

2009-04-10T13:41:00.000-07:00

Here is the homily I'll be preaching on the first of Jesus' "Seven Last Words" ... I get to lead off the community Good Friday service with "Father Forgive them..." Enjoy! (or don't, you have free will).

Luke 23:32-38 (NKJV)
There were also two others, criminals, led with Him to be put to death. And when they had come to the place called The Skull, there they crucified Him, and the criminals, one on the right hand and the other on the left. Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.” And they divided His garments and cast lots. And the people stood looking on. But even the rulers with them sneered, saying, “He saved others; let Him save Himself if He is the Christ, the chosen of God.” The soldiers also mocked Him, coming and offering Him sour wine, and saying, “If You are the King of the Jews, save Yourself.” And an inscription also was written over Him in letters of Greek, Latin, and Hebrew: THIS IS THE KING OF THE JEWS.

Father Forgive them, for they do not know what they do…

Why would Jesus pray this prayer? Why would he ask for forgiveness on behalf of the very people who are MOCKING him … TORTURING him … PREPARING HIM TO DIE …

Because of LOVE

It is clear that those who were crucifying Jesus didn’t realize that HE is the Messiah … they didn’t recognize the teaching of the prophets leads to him … they didn’t realize the miracles he performed were done as an extension of the hand of God.
So why would Christ ask forgiveness on their ignorance?

Because of LOVE

Why would we who can’t forgive one another … who carry the baggage of GRUDGES, who harbor BITTERNESS, who present ourselves as HAUGHTY, and reek of ENTITLEMENT receive forgiveness?

Because of LOVE

Why would we be forgiven for the things we’ve done and left undone? Why would God care about human-beings? Why would Jesus take our place on the cross …

Because of LOVE

BECAUSE … AT OUR WORST … AT OUR BEST … WHEN WE’RE CRUEL … WHEN WE’RE KIND … WHEN WE TURN OUR BACKS ON CHRIST … WHEN WE FALL AT JESUS’ FEET …

GOD LOVES US

GOD LOVES YOU … GOD LOVES ME … SO MUCH THAT GOD SENT JESUS TO DIE ON A CROSS AND THAT IS WHEN CHRIST’S WORDS ARE SPOKEN TO US

… FATHER, FORGIVE THEM, THEY DO NOT KNOW WHAT THEY ARE DOING

What Did God Say?

2009-02-02T12:57:00.001-08:00

In a hope to update my blog a bit more often, I've decided to kill two birds with one stone. Below is the text of a mailing that I send out weekly to our homebound members. Generally it summarizes the sermon from the previous Sunday ... or in some cases, I think it says better (and in less words) what I really wanted to say on Sunday during worship. Anyway, enjoy ...

Romans 8:26-32

This week in our sermon series, “Can You Hear God Now” the focus was less on “hearing God” and specifically on “What Did God Say” Ever since I started preparing for this sermon, I couldn’t help but get the scene from one of the Star Wars movies (pitty me that I don’t remember exactly which one) where there is some sort of exchange in a foreign language … Han Solo, the “renegade” character played by Harrison Ford speaks to C3-PO saying “do you understand what he said?” C3-PO, who is an android known for his ability to speak a number of languages responds, “Oh, Yes, I am fluent in over 6-million forms of communication” … then Han Solo delivers the clincher line rather emphatically, “What Did He Say”?

I wonder if sometimes we focus too much on the fact that we are communicating with God and not enough on what God is actually saying. Are we too often like C3-PO who wants to brag about the many forms of communication he is fluent in? Do we want to brag too much about the mere fact that we have a connection with God and totally miss that the important fact is what God is saying to us?

In our Epistle this week, Paul is writing to the Roman church and encouraging and instructing the members of that church. In Chapter 8, we are given an image of God that is quite counter to the image that the world gives us. Paul writes, “God loves you so much that there is nothing that can separate you from God. Period. End of Story.” (this is my translation of what he’s saying anyway). I think too often we conjure these images of a god who is wrathful and judgmental. A god who would rather make a list of rules that we can’t possibly follow, so we are destined for failure and therefore destined for God to not love us anymore. But Paul reminds us, “Nothing can separate us from the love of God” and then he goes on to list the things that we think will cause separation.

This is Good News! In the face of all that is going on in the world today. In the face of increasing crime in nearby towns, riots, financial downturn, and even a Super Bowl devoid of interesting commercials, none of these things change the fact that God loves us. And it certainly doesn’t change the fact that “God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” (John 3:17)

I Know It By Heart

2008-12-19T12:40:00.000-08:00

Do you know the Christmas Story? Sure, we all do. Do you know which Gospels tell what part of the story? Do you know that what most of us know as "THE" Christmas story is actually a harmonized story between a variety of sources? For example, did you know that the angel only appears to Mary in the Gospel of Luke? Did you know that the angel only appears to Joseph in the Gospel of Matthew? And yet, when we hear the story, especially in a children's Christmas play, we put both stories into the "one" story that we tell.

I've been thinking a bit about the harmonization of texts as I have focused on the texts that I have to preach on for the upcoming weekend. The assigned text is Luke 1:26-38, this is the part of the birth narrative where Mary learns from an angel that she is pregnant and then she sings the Magnificat (enter choir).

As I've thought about this and about the worship service that we are planning at Hope, I've thought about a dichotomy that seems to exist in two phrases that we seem to use interchangeably, those are "I have that memorized" and "I know it by heart". To make these phrases stand out just a little more, let's use a concrete example.

Most of us if asked will say that we have the words to "Jesus Loves Me" memorized. We know the tune, we know the words, so we can sing the song without any assistance from a piece of paper in front of us. Many of us will even say "I know that song by heart" again simply meaning, "I don't need a songbook in front of me, I can sing that song". And, I guess we can be right in both cases.

But, I will contend that to say "I know it by heart" actually is saying something more than "I have memorized it" Memorization is simply an act that we do. We memorize a lot of things from multiplication tables to addresses and phone numbers to people's names. But when we "know something by heart" I think we move into another level ... we actually find a large value in that item. So if someone asks me, "do you know the song 'Jesus Loves Me'?" and I reply, "Yes, I know it by heart" I believe what I am saying is, "I've thought about the words, these words are important to me, there is a deep meaning that resonates within me."

This brings me to a question ... have we simply memorized the Christmas Story or do we Know it by Heart? Do we simply recite details of the story that we've heard from a variety of sources? or Have we allowed the story of Christmas to penetrate our hearts and to resonate within us ... becoming a cornerstone of who we are?

Not a "Happy" movie watched on my Birthday

2008-12-13T18:01:00.000-08:00

So, today is my birthday. I know, "Happy Birthday" ... it's obligatory, whether you care or not, you have to say it right? O.K. I'm a cynic. Most people really do care that you have a happy day, but I think it really has become one of the many niceties that we have a knee-jerk reaction to without thinking what we are really saying. But that's not the point of what I want to say here.

Today is my birthday. So to celebrate my wonderful wife took me to a movie of my choosing. Now, there aren't a whole lot of movies showing right now that I was excited to see, so I opted for one that I wanted to see but knew would be heavy and sad. Oh, well, what's a guy to do. You only get so many chances to see a movie in the theater when you have a baby at home.

So the movie we went to see was "The Boy In the Striped Pajamas" If you haven't seen the previews, it's a historical fiction about a boy who's father was Commander of one of the Concentration camps during the Holocaust. (spoiler warning - if you read the synopsis on the official website it says way too much about the plot of the film - so I suggest waiting until after the movie to read it). I went in knowing it would be a heavy and sad movie, but I wasn't quite prepared for this. The ending of the film was a shot to the gut and I'm certain that anyone who walks out of the film having not cried has to be the reincarnation of Hitler himself. It's sad, Period! There is no getting around that.

I will also offer that it is an AMAZING film and one that everyone NEEDS to see. Like Passion of the Christ, Schindler's List, and other such movies, it's necessary, especially for younger generations, to know about this part of history and think about how stories like this resonate with current events.

There are SO many amazing aspects of this film. Some of the choices in shot selection really speak volumes to messages being conveyed. Some of the storyline choices ask multiple questions (not just, "how could the Nazis do this?"). Some of the aspects of the film draw you into a story that you otherwise thought you were not a part of.

If I haven't said it enough, I really think this movie is amazing. I've already been thinking about ways that I could use this in a congregational setting. It certainly fits an Ethics class, but churches could surely use this film and conversation within small group and education times. I could even see preaching a pretty challenging sermon series with this film.

So, my summary about the film is that it will make you think, it is excellent. I've probably never said this about a film, but I would go as far as to say it is our responsibility to see this film!

Patience

2008-12-03T21:10:00.000-08:00

I've come to the realization over the past few weeks that we are part of a society that has lost our ability to be patient. We are able to get anything we want 24/7. Stores are always open for us to get exactly what we want. We can always turn to the Internet for information at the click of a mouse. We can't stand the idea of waiting in line. We are willing to pay extra to get things faster. We simply have lost any sense of patience.

Just yesterday I was driving down the road and approached an intersection. The light was green in my direction so I was proceeding when someone from the cross-street decided to pull out in front of me. As if somehow the 10 seconds it was going to take for me to cross through the intersection was going to impede this person from getting to work (or wherever they were headed) on time. To make matters worse this person pulled out slowly and proceeded down the road slowly (causing me to slow down) which of course frustrated me and made me realize my own impatience! I had places to be (I really was running a little late to get to a meeting ... but that was MY fault). But I thought about the fact that this person couldn't wait at their red light for their turn. It's because we think we're more important than everyone around us.

In the church year we are in the midst of the Advent season. It is a season of preparation and anticipation. It is a season that is anti everything in our society. Our society tells us we can have it all RIGHT NOW and in Advent we learn we have to wait and anticipate. And waiting is good for us. It gives us time to think and reflect. It gives us time to appreciate what we will experience. When we look forward to something we get excited about. When we anticipate something we tell others about it. When we are patient we get rewarded. And Advent is a season of promise that never disappoints. Every year at the end of Advent we celebrate Christmas ... We wait for Jesus to come and guess what ... HE DOES!

So, let's wait ... let's be patient ... let's anticipate what is to come ... then when it does, let's party like it's 1999! (or something like that).

The World Needs Benchwarmers

2008-11-23T15:30:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago I went to a conference, well it wasn't so much a conference (where you learn new tools) as much as it was an inspirational event (go get 'em team). It was a good event, it just wasn't quite what I expected. I did enjoy the time, I was inspired. A few of the teachers/pastors had some great new insights that I was happy to hear, but one of them really ticked me off.

So this guy is rattling through his Bible quoting this scripture and that scripture and I felt like either he was ADHD or I was becoming ADHD at the frenetic pace that he was traveling back and forth in his Bible. Then, he spoke the sentence that really got under my skin ... he said, "you know, I never understood why there were guys who played sports in high school and practiced with the team and never played in the game. They were happy to sit on the bench ... why did they do that? Why didn't they just quit."

UGH! What a cocky thing to say. O.K. In this character's defense his point was "as Christians we shouldn't just sit on the bench - we need to get out the do it" But I think he chose a REALLY bad analogy. It didn't take long for me to shoot his analogy to pieces ... then in conversation with others they ripped it apart further.

Now, I'm not telling you this to say "this guy is dumb" but to make a point. The world needs benchwarmers.

In high school I was on the football team. I never started a Varsity game, in fact I rarely played in a game. But I think I made valuable contributions to the team. In the cold winter weather I kept the ponchos of the starters warm while they were on the field so they were pre-warmed when they came off the field. During practice, I was the guy willing to stand there with a blocking pad so they had someone to block. When one of the starters got injured, guys like me were there to carry them off the field ... and to take their place when they couldn't play. I'd say the guys on the bench did a lot for the good of the team.

I realize that this guy is trying to make a point ... but it's not a good point. There are plenty of people who were benchwarmers through much of their career who then went on to be great coaches. Maybe they didn't have the greatest talent but they could inspire others to achieve their potential.

I guess my point in all of this is simply that you never quite know how God is going to use you or in what ways God will prepare you for the ministry you are called to. For some of us, being part of the team in high school taught us valuable lessons for the life we are now living. So don't tell me that the world doesn't need benchwarmers otherwise you've just invalidated my entire life.

I'm thinking so hard my head hurts

2008-11-06T20:30:00.000-08:00

O.K. My head doesn't really hurt, but it should. I've been doing a lot of thinking today and I don't think I'll get to stop thinking tomorrow. So, I guess that's a good thing, if we stop thinking I think we stop living, but I'm not entirely sure about that. But let me let you into a few of my recent thoughts.

The recent Presidential election was quite a treat. For the first time since my first time voting 16 years ago I felt like my vote really mattered and that the experience was actually kind of fun. It was the first time I had to duck the campaigners on the way in ... I don't care what they wanted to tell me, I made my decisions, I don't want to hear anymore (anyone else glad there are no more political commercials on television?). I especially enjoyed two guys who were standing just in front of me in line. They were most definitely college students voting for the first time ... they had that "just rolled out of bed look" to them (why they didn't wait until later in the day, I won't ever know). Still, they made it a point to go and vote. This leads to the fact that for the first time I wasn't the youngest person voting ... by a long shot. There were tons of young people (listen to me, am I someone's grandpa?) in line voting while I was there.

I was pleased with McCain's concession speech and Obama's acceptance speech. Yeah, it's politics, but they both played nice. I appreciated Obama's honesty that it might take a year, it might take all term. And well, it must have been alright, Oprah was there.

On to other thoughts ... What does God have in mind now? I mean, God's hand is in this whole thing, so what's next God? I guess we all have to listen. I'm tired of listening, but I've got a lifetime of it ahead of me so I might as well get used to it. Actually, I do plenty of speaking too ... I get to talk to too many people and somehow they are all convinced I know what I'm talking about. I guess I did something right.

Why is junkfood so bad for us? We all love to eat it and it tastes good so why does it make us fat? I would love to live on nacho cheese sauce ... there's just something disgustingly good about it. As a second course I'll take chocolate in pretty much any form. I've rarely found chocolate I don't like ... now, that doesn't count things that are "artificially flavored" simply, that is not chocolate. Now that Halloween is behind us, I have been fighting the urge to eat every "leftover" candybar in our house. Slowly but surely they are getting eaten, thankfully not all by me. Equally, why is fast food so bad for us and so expensive? I remember being able to eat out for under $5 ... those days are gone unless one eats on the "value" menu and where's the fun in that? I know, I should bring my own lunch, but alas some days I am too lazy to pack one (I'm honest) and other days, nothing sounds good (that has nothing to do with the fact that we're still eating cold cuts that we froze after Olivia's baptism 2 months ago).

Why don't the Packers ever get television coverage in California? I'm tired of the 49ers and Raiders, I think everyone admits neither of these teams is worth watching. Can we please have some other options in the Bay Area? And no, I am not buying Sunday Ticket in order to see the games I want (not like I get to watch the "early" game anyway since I'm in worship during that time). And what's up with this football at 10am thing? Can we not have time-delay on the game for those of us that go to church in the morning? I know, it's called a VCR but that's no fun for me, I'd rather complain.

I'm pretty sure that what I've typed above isn't worth much. It's just the ramblings of a mind that has spent too much time thinking over the last few weeks. I think what I really need is to sit in front of a good Hockey game with a nice glass of Jack Daniel's Single Barrel - remember Jack learned to distill from a Lutheran pastor, so it's part of my Lutheran heritage to drink JD.

Who's gonna change it?

2008-10-21T20:16:00.000-07:00

Well, here's a thought or two that have been brewing in my head a while now. It seems that we're in a "perfect storm" of articles and suggestions coming together to finally irk me enough to write these words, so here goes.

When is the term "Christian" going to stop being associated solely with the "fundagelical" movement?

I am tired of reading about "Christians" and it becoming clear that the conversation is not about Christians but a specific segment of Christians. Recently I read a devotion that talked on this very topic (you can read it here) well, at least it hit me in that way. Additionally, a number of years ago a friend of mine wrote a wonderful song called "You Don't Speak For Me" and I'm often reminded of the fact that some people try to speak on my behalf without really doing so. Of course there's the current movie, that I want to see at some point, from Bill Maher called Religulous but again, it points at "Christians" but really means one segment of Christians.

I guess my point in all of this is not that I blame any of these folks for talking about the "fundagelicals" as Christians because they've been the ones bold enough to take a stand on things and get in front of enough people that people know who they are. No, my point is when are the rest of us going to stand for something or work to get in the press so that our name is put along side Christian as well?

I think about this now as I work with a small congregation in a retirement community. There's something brewing in this place and it's exciting because what is brewing is a dream, an idea that "this little church will do great things". I hope they can do something in this community and actually change people's impressions of Christians! This might be just the kick in the pants everyone else needs!

I got nothin'

2008-09-26T13:59:00.000-07:00

O.K. So, I keep telling myself I'm going to update my blog more frequently ... I also tell myself I'm going to start exercising regularly. So far it's been NO on both accounts. I know all the reasons I should exercise, but there are few reasons to update my blog regularly at this point in my life. I mean, it's not like there is anyone out there depending on what words I write in order to make some move in their life (at least I hope there isn't).

Sure I can reflect a few musings that people will find humorous or at least insightful, maybe even inspirational, but there's nothing that I've done in this blog that has changed someone's world. It kind of makes me wonder why I even have this thing sometimes. Wouldn't life be easier if I didn't have that nagging voice in the back of my head that says "write something"?

So, here I sit trying to come up with something interesting, yet, I got nothin'. I did have an amusing day today. I woke-up an hour later than I intended to which caused quite the shock through my system. Now, it's not like I was just late for work or breakfast or something ... I was running late to catch an early morning airplane! UGH! fortunately there was a little bit of a safety net in my plans and I have a loving wife who took care of me (by driving me to the airport as opposed to my earlier plan of taking Public Transit). When I got to the airport I was amused to go through the security line with a whole heap of people from Denmark (the flight was going from San Francisco to Atlanta and "continuing" to Copenhagen ... incidentally can you really call it a "continuing" flight if everyone has to get off and the people "continuing" have to go 5 terminals over in the airport to "continue"?) I was also amused as I walked to the gate and heard, "Ladies and Gentlemen we've overbooked this flight and are looking for volunteers to take a later flight"

Now, normally, I'm all for taking the later flight and taking the flight credit, however the next flight they could get me on wouldn't have me landing in Atlanta until 7:30 or later ... since I'm only here for a little more than 24-hours, that just didn't seem to make much sense to me. So I watched as a large crowd of people thought about taking another flight, but also seemed to be of the same thought "If that's when I'm getting there, forget it, I'll take my chances."

What kind of way is that to run a business anyway? Let's oversell by 10% hoping that folks won't show up! CRAZY! What do you do when everyone does show up?

Oh, well. There's plenty right with the world these days. Like the other day when I was traveling on Public Transit with my daughter (who is now 4 months, so active, but able to walk onto a bus herself). Somehow in the wisdom of the Bus Company it is safer for me to hold her on the bus than to leave her in her stroller and lock the wheels and hold on to the stroller (explain that to me if you can). When I was leaving the bus, they have this "kneeling" system where the front of the bus is lowered by hydraulics ... well, for some reason the bus driver wasn't close enough to the curb, so the bus was still about a foot off of the ground ... a long way to "tip" a stroller. Fortunately, a nice guy got off just before me and noticed the struggle I was going to have and he helped me life the stroller down. (this redeemed another young man ... teenager) who decided he had more of a right to sit on the BART seat than I did and pushed his way around me to sit in one of the few seats available to someone with a stroller ... do kids just not think?

Anyway, I've probably ranted enough. I sit here in Atlanta ... having made my flight, enjoyed the meager snacks they provide on a continent-wide flight, and enjoyed a humorous movie too (Leatherheads, I highly recommend it if you want a good light-hearted laugh). I am ready to enjoy a retreat ... I look forward to this chance to get away every year. I encourage y'all to retreat as well ... even if for a day ... go to the park, go to a quiet room and just be in the presence of God and see what God has to say to you ... right now God is saying, "you have a sermon to write, you might want to start working on it before Sunday morning" ... OK, God, I'm listening.

It's not really about carrying your cross

2008-09-02T17:13:00.000-07:00

This past weekend I preached on Matthew 16:21-28. Part of the passage is a point where Jesus is walking with his disciples (unusual, I know) and they just aren't quite getting it (even more unusual, I know). I'm sure most of us remember Jesus' words in the passage, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me." (16:24)

As I preached on this part of the text this past weekend, I remembered watching a series on A&E called "God or the Girl" The series tracked 4 guys who were discerning a call to the Catholic Priesthood (ultimately coming down to the question "do they feel called to the Priesthood or Marriage?").

I recall one of the guys, as part of his discernment, went to the lumber yard and bought some landscape timbers in order to build a cross (weighing about 100-pounds if I remember right) and then he would carry it a distance (maybe 20-ish miles).

As I thought about this act, I was struck by a few things that I think we can all learn from and I think are ultimately the point that Jesus is calling us to in carrying our own cross.

1. He didn't just head out, buy wood, build a cross and start walking. He planned ahead. He had a vision for what he wanted to accomplish through this act.

2. He didn't head out alone, he had a support group walking with him. While he carried the cross for the lion's share of the journey, he did have others walking with him ... reading scripture to encourage him, giving him water to meet his needs, helping him when he couldn't carry the cross alone.

3. He was open to what he would experience along the way. Even though he had planned things out, he was open to those things that he couldn't plan for.

In our own lives what are the crosses that we have to carry?

Where is God calling us to plan ahead and cast a vision in our lives?

Who are the people walking with us in our journey? Are they encouraging us? Are they willing to push us those last few miles when we don't think we can do it? Will they carry our burdens with us?

Are we open to what we experience along the way or do we simply "stick to the plan" no matter what? What is God teaching us when we least expect it?

Feeling Convicted

2008-08-09T20:49:00.000-07:00

So, here I sit in a Chicago hotel room as I process the information that has been "downloaded" to my brain in the last two days. I'm at a Mission Developer Training event hosted by the ELCA and I've been having a BLAST, but my head is feeling about like it will explode soon.

I've enjoyed the opportunity to meet face to face some people that I have known only through email or internet bulletin boards up until now. There is something surreal that happens when you meet people that you have a virtual relationship with, it really does shift things. It's not a bad thing, it just helps to really frame things in a more authentic way.

As I sit and process the information (after two very full days of seminars, eating really good food, and a wonderful worship opportunity at Willow Creek Community Church) I can't help but think about one sentence in particular that is running through my head. Someone (might have been a presenter, might have been a participant) asked a seemingly simple question ...

Do we love to tell the story or do we just love the story?

Hmmm ... that's a good point. If you missed the nuance in the sentence above, re-read it here, I'll try to make it obvious... Do we love to tell the story or do we just love the story?

I've had to ask myself, "outside of a worship service, when is the last time you've told the story of Jesus Christ?" I can't say I'm sure I know the answer. Yes, I'm sure I've made vague comments to people, but I'm pretty sure I haven't just sat down and answered any question by saying, "you know, it's about Jesus ... let me tell you about him and what he's done for you." I mean, sure, I'm a Lutheran and we're notorious for not being too out-going and yes, I'm an introvert, but those are simply excuses.

So, here I sit, feeling convicted, feeling like I need to tell the story to someone ...

Where does the time go?

2008-08-03T16:11:00.000-07:00

If you're anything like me, you start out at various points of the year feeling like you have all kinds of time to accomplish a set list of goals only to get toward the end of that time to discover that you haven't accomplished a quarter of what you set out to do.

Well, I can't say that was entirely the case this summer, but I sure feel like I've gotten to the end of my "free time" with only a few of the items that I hoped to accomplish checked-off.

I did get to celebrate the birth of my daughter, I did go visit Alaska, I got moved into a new home, and I did travel with my family to Southern California for a few days. That sounds like a lot when put in a list, but I feel like I had so much more I could have accomplished. I had a list of books that I wanted to read and haven't gotten to any of them (I actually secretly hoped I would read one of them and that would have made me happy ... didn't even accomplish that).

Maybe I just need deadlines in order to accomplish things. I seem to have this tendency to put things off until the last minute, but if I have a deadline, then I get them done. For example, if I take magazines on a trip with me and promise myself I won't bring them home, I do tend to read them before coming home. Maybe there's hope for me yet.

In other news, I've been obsessing about the whole Brett Favre situation these days. I'm not sure why I care so much ... yes, I'm a Packer fan, yes, I think Favre is a great quarterback but in the scope of the world does it really matter if he comes back to play? Apparently in my world it does matter. Its one of my guilty pleasures ... next to watching hockey!

O.k. one of my goals for this summer was to write a blog entry that actually mattered ... and I will do it yet, but maybe not before I start my internship ... still, I have a topic in my mind that I really want to write on and get some thoughts on the table.

Peace!

Life, Death and Taxes

2008-06-21T09:16:00.000-07:00

Has it really been 6 weeks since I last posted? I guess so. I know, I should have posted earlier but alas I keep coming up with good excuses as to why I haven't. Most of the reasons revolve around not getting enough sleep or wondering what happened to the hours of the day or having tons of other things that are more important than posting an updated blog. But this morning, I have no good excuses, so I sit here typing to hopefully explain the last 6 weeks.

Let's start with the fact that the school year ended in mid-May with a host of papers to be written all at the same time. Yes, I knew about many of them in advance, but why get started on a paper in advance when you have two weeks in which you can write them all. I have to say that I was most impressed with the score I got one part of a take-home exam ... after banging my head against the wall for hours thinking "this sucks" and then realizing the deadline was all too close and I had better refine what I had and turn it in, I finally got to the point of saying "forget it ... I'll turn in what I have with a note saying, "this sucks, but it's all I've got left" ... somehow on that one essay (1 of 5 I had to turn in for that class) I got a 28 out of 28! Go figure ... I guess I know more than I think I do sometimes.

On to the title of this blog. If you haven't been included on the news of LIFE then there must be a major malfunction in my information forwarding system. Yes, we finally welcomed our baby into the world on May 29 ... 9lbs 11oz and Olivia Grace finally got to see mom and dad with her eyes! There were a few delays in getting her home from the hospital, those were taxing on us emotionally, but all in all things went really well.

Between Olivia's birth and her coming home, we moved to a new apartment. Thanks to a wonderful group of friends who went way above and beyond the call of duty! We got moved to our new space in Walnut Creek where (now 3 weeks later) we are settled in and living happily. All of the books about birth say you shouldn't move too close to the time of the baby's due date, and now I know why ... there are simply too many things that can happen to derail a perfectly laid plan. Oh, well. We made it, although we're still trying to find our ice bucket!

Regarding DEATH there is never a good time for the passing of a loved one or a friend. I was shocked at the news of the death of one of my seminary classmates from a massive heart attack. She was only 55 and so vibrant. I remember seeing her smiling face before she left for the summer and in my mind I only thought, "we are so blessed to have Margaret here" ... now I utter those words again as I think about how blessed I have been to have her (and her wonderful husband) touch my life. Despite many students being gone for the summer, about 70 people gathered at the PLTS chapel for a service of memory and prayer the day after Margaret's death ... I know that will only be the beginning of how our class will remember her.

As for TAXES can I just utter how annoyed I am that the IRS is so difficult to figure out. So we got a letter from a past employer saying that they accidentally misreported income (I feel like a fool for not having noticed when I did our taxes) in 2006. So, I'm trying to figure out what I need to do in order to correct my filing with the IRS. I have a feeling it is going to be a huge hassle and there will likely be little help along the way. So, if you'd like to help me figure out how to give the IRS more money (because surely there will be a penalty involved as well as more tax due since the amount reported was too low originally) let me know.

It's been a sleepless night for me. I was resting well from about midnight until 3:30 am when Olivia woke-up hungry. As is the norm in the house, I got the pleasure of changing her diaper when she was done eating. After that, I simply couldn't get back to sleep. It's not like I had anything on my mind (except, "gee it would be nice to get back to sleep") or had anything I should be doing. So there I lay in bed debating about getting up ... finally at 6:30 (Olivia's next meal time) I decided I had enough of laying bed awake ... downstairs to the computer I trod ... played some games, checked some email, played more games ... now I blog. Maybe if I turn on the TV I'll be able to get a few minutes of sleep before the day begins.

I really do appreciate my thumbnail

2008-05-03T13:26:00.000-07:00

O.K. So it probably sounds like a crazy thing to say, but I really do appreciate my thumbnail. I mean, let's be honest with ourselves - how often do we think of the minor parts of our body that tend to play a very important role? Probably, as in my case, we only think of these parts when we do something that makes them foremost in our minds.

Set the scene ... in the small kitchen in our apartment, preparing dinner I am quietly cutting up a bell pepper. Cutting out the insides, then into strips, then cutting into a small dice when low and behold the lovely sharp blade of my Chicago Cutlery chef's knife comes down on my thumbnail! Ouch! I exclaim. I pause for a moment looking down to see how much blood is already oozing out from the cut and to see how bad the cut is. It's doesn't look terrible (no need to call 911 or anything) but it's also not the kind of wound that you just shake off and keep working on dinner.

Upon further examination, I discover that I have cut clear through the thumbnail and just scratched into the surface of the skin. My lovely wife comes in to find out what I've done and I explain the situation to her calmly. She decides I need a bandage, I think a fingernail cutter is in order to attempt to remove the remnant of fingernail that is somehow still attached to my thumb. I discover there is not much blood, so I decide that finishing the dice on the bell pepper and throwing it in the pan is in order ... afterall, there's a pregnant woman waiting for her dinner and I don't want my carelessness to get in the way of that.

Once I get the fingernail trimmer, I attempt to remove the piece of thumbnail to discover it's attached by the skin under the nail ... so I opt to not rip the skin wide open and just put the bandage over the wound and figure I'll deal with it later.

The next day I examine the wound and discover it's really not that bad. But for the short time I had the bandage on my thumb I was abundantly aware of all the times that I use my thumb and how something as simple as a nail cut by a kitchen knife can get in the way. I also became very grateful for having a thumbnail ... afterall without it there's a good chance I would have cut well into the thumb itself. I also thought about the many uses the thumbnail serves ... the opportunity to peel things, pick things (c'mon, we've all picked our nose at least once in our lives), pick things up, etc ...

So, this is my ode to the thumbnail, one of the less appreciated parts of the body, but a very important one. And for those of you looking for a spiritual tie in this experience, you need look no further than Paul's letter to the Corinthians where he writes (in the 12th chapter): Now the body is not made up of one part but of many. If the foot should say, "Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. And if the ear should say, "Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? But in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body.

Have I mentioned I love hockey?

2008-04-23T14:49:00.000-07:00

Seriously, I don't think I talk about this wonderful sport enough. I admit, I'm a bit of a "fair weather" fan. Not so much in who I cheer for (sadness still for the Nashville Predators no longer being in the Playoffs) but for the fact that I tend to watch sporadically. That is, until playoff hockey rolls around.

There are two reasons that playoff hockey gets me watching more:

1. Games are actually televised

2. The hockey is much better

Let's take these topics item by item ...

1. Why is it that hockey is a second class sport? Why is basketball on television all the time and hockey is lucky to get one night even on cable television? Do that many more people really like basketball? Not the people I talk to. Most people I talk to could really care less about basketball. Those that watch basketball seem to do so because it's on (and they can't seem to watch any non-sports television). I realize that most of the country is not as obsessed about the sport as my home state of Minnesota where in March you can find the State High School Hockey Tournament covered game by game through the whole weekend of the tournament. But, I think that the reason more people don't watch hockey is simple ... it's not on television. Oh, how I miss the days of living in Minnesota where there was always a hockey game on some cable channel.

2. I used to think that hockey was hockey and playoff hockey wasn't any better or more competitive, but that's just not the case. During the playoffs you find guys who haven't checked someone all year hitting at every opportunity. You find a few more fights breaking out. You find guys skating like their paycheck depends on it (oh, that's right ... during the playoffs it does). Goalies are out of their minds with the saves they are making. Forwards are skating circles around defensemen. Enforcers are picking their guy and running for him. It's a great game!

I admit I am obsessed with the sport. Lately, I watch every chance I get (and now I'm bummed that there are no games on today). I put the game on in the background no matter what I'm doing. I become more productive during the intermissions because I don't want to miss a minute of the game.

I also admit that I view hockey as an activity. It's not something I passively watch, it's something I engage in. I'm thinking about the plays, I'm wondering who's on the ice, I'm considering which team will do what next. The best thing, I don't care who's playing. Yes, I cheer harder for some teams, but I don't care who's playing, I still actively watch. When it comes to baseball or football, I watch some teams but not others. Hockey, I watch whoever is on (heck it could be the B Pee Wee team and I'd watch it).

So, here's to hockey! I can't wait until tomorrow when I get to watch more!

Proud of those around me ...

2008-04-18T16:56:00.000-07:00

I think we all have a tendency to want to be the one who gets noticed. I mean, let's be honest with ourselves. We want to be the one that gets asked to dance, that gets asked on a date, that gets picked for the team, that gets to play the solo. We want to be the one that people know (even if we don't want all of the trouble that comes along with it). We want to stand from the crowd.

So, in some way we tend to struggle when others get the press, get the accolades, and get rewarded for doing things we want to get noticed for.

Recently, I was reading my friend Jonathan's blog and learned that he was selected as one of 10 artists on a list of "best Christian Rock" songs in the New York Times! Can you believe it? Someone I know is in the New York Times! I should be thrilled (and I am) and yet a little part of me says, "man I wish that was me" ... and I hate that little part of me. I really do. I don't want to envy others, and yet it's in my gut that I do.

A few years ago a friend of mine was featured in (I think it was) Time magazine because she was part of a group of single people who watched out for one another. This friend is one of those people that "happens" to run into all kinds of famous people, gets picked for prestigious experiences, and knows everyone. I keep wishing there was one thing I could do that would top her.

A few years ago my wife was invited to submit an article for the Lutheran magazine. I was proud of her being selected and thought she wrote a great piece. I was excited when the magazine sent a photographer to take pictures of the band. I was thrilled to see that the cover picture of that month's magazine featured the hands of our guitarist, the feature picture for the series of articles had a picture of our lead singer, and my wife's picture was next to her writing, but I, the lowly drummer, was left out.

I know, we're not supposed to get down about such things, but we do. It's our nature ... at least it's my nature. I tell people I don't really care (which, in the big picture is true ... I really don't need the accolades to be a complete person ... nor do any of these people I've listed above) still I want to be the one who gets noticed, who wins, who gets selected.

I'm sure in my life there have been times when I have been selected over others and I've just seen those moments as me "getting what I deserved." I'm sure there are people who look at me now and think "he's got it all, I wish I were in his shoes." And I have to say, I'm quite happy with my life. I'm happy being the guy who knows all of the people who are getting the accolades. I really am.

Still, I think of a song that Duey Jolivette wrote years ago, a song that is sappy, cheesy, and whatever else, but nonetheless a song that sticks with me. A song that simply states, "my part of the story may be small, my part of the story may not have the curtain call, but when the story's done, I know there is one, who loves me as I am." I think of that lyric often (as a matter of fact, I blogged about it about this time last year ... must be something about Springtime) and when I think of it, I am reminded that the One who matters has chosen me.

Gems from 500 years ago

2008-04-03T02:58:00.000-07:00

As a seminarian I get the privilege of doing some pretty cool things. I get to hang out in the afternoon soaking the rays of sunshine while holding a book and attempting to make sense of the words written in its pages. I get to spend hours in class on days when the sun beckons, "skip class, some hang with me." I even have the privilege of regurgitating what little knowledge actually settles into the gray matter between my ears out onto the page (page after page) in hopes that I somehow answer correctly the questions posed by a professor who tends to usually make my head spin with ideas.

Every once in a while though, I come across a nugget in my reading that I just have to share with others. Usually it's a lame quote or a one-liner that makes me re-think my entire existence ... or at best it is a few words strung neatly together that drive a stake through the heart of those I disagree with. Well, tonight, I found a wonderful piece of writing that I just had to share from the Apology to the Augsburg Confession:

...we confess that hypocrites and evil people are mixed together in the church
and that the sacraments are efficacious even though they may be dispensed by
evil ministers, because the ministers act in the place of Christ and so do not
represent their own person.

It's a beautiful thing when you realize that mudslinging language is not merely a creation of the 20th century ... Oh, Philip, you crazy, crazy man. There could be no such thing as an "evil" minister ... but if there were, I sure am glad that it's God's action, and not mine that saves me!

p.s. I just finished a paper for a class, due in 6 hours ... I guess I should get a little sleep before wandering into class, eh?

Holy Discontent

2008-03-24T08:34:00.000-07:00

CHRIST IS RISEN! HE IS RISEN INDEED!

I write with the excitement of the empty tomb in my heart. I would like to relay a story from my trip to the Holy Land. We were visiting the chapel which is built around what might have been the tomb that Jesus rose from, one of the guys on the tour (a bit of a cut-up) went into the small space and emerged and looked at our tour guide saying, "He's not there!" our tour guide smiled, others in the group laughed. Later, the tour guide hearkened back to that moment and said, "Isn't it wonderful that Jesus wasn't there. Some people come to the Holy Land looking for Jesus. But for us, Lutheran Christians, we hold Jesus in our hearts because we know that we won't find Jesus here ... we know that he has risen, Alleluia!"

I have to admit that in the midst of the excitement over Easter I find myself with Holy Discontent (a concept coined by Bill Hybels to discuss those things that one feels so passionate about they can do no other than act on them) about the way most people treat Easter. I was almost pleased to see a larger than average crowd gathered for worship yesterday. It was nice to see some new faces, people who were maybe visiting from out of town, but more than likely people who feel that they have now done their duty and don't have to return until Christmas. So why even come? What's the point? Does it somehow lift your guilt from the year to know that you've taken this one morning to be with the Lord?

I also have to add that the worship space was beautiful. It was nicely adorned with colorful flowers, lively artwork, and vivid altar decorations. But I can't help but to think that next week we will be back to one or two flower arrangements, plain walls, and an altar adorned with a basic white cloth.

Does God not deserve our best when we come for worship? Should we not bring the excitement of Easter to worship each time we come into God's presence? Can we not make our relationship with God a priority and carve out time each week to be in God's presence?

A friend of mine who is a pastor in Wisconsin recently wrote on his blog about his frustration with his confirmation class. I added a comment to his blog that essentially said, "the system is broken and we can't be afraid to fix it." My friend understands the problems, but it seems he is trapped in a system that won't allow him to fix the problem. He is trapped with apathetic parents who are dropping off their children to "get religion" (sorry parents, Christianity is NOT a spectator sport). He is trapped with apathetic kids who would rather being doing anything than sitting in a confirmation class (I say, let them ... if they don't want to be there, I've got better things to do with my time). He is trapped in a system where confirmation is a "rite of passage" that can be compared to High School graduation, at the end of which the students say, "I'm outta here" (and statistics show how many young people leave the church at the point and NEVER come back). He's trapped with families who are at least honest enough to tell him, "I have more important things to do than to be a Christian." (again I say, good riddance, we don't need you in the church).

Now, I may sound a bit harsh ... afterall, if we get rid of all of the people who don't put God first all of the time then we've got no one left (and yes, that includes the pastors, because frankly, we all sin and put other things before our relationship with God once in a while) but there are communities of people who at least try to put God first in their life. I have been fortunate to be part of such communities. People who long to gather on Sunday mornings not for the coffee and donuts, but for the experience with the Living Saviour. People who realize that church is not just a Sunday Morning event, but spend each day of the week serving God in all that they do. People who are so excited for ministry that they are telling their friends about what happened in church on Sunday or in their small group on Tuesday night. Do these people sound familiar? They sound a bit like Jesus' disciples, but they also sound like people I have met in various places across the country.

Just like the picture at the beginning of this blog shows, the tomb is empty ... it's time to tell people about it and be excited about the life we get to live because of it!

Out of Touch

2008-03-07T17:40:00.001-08:00

So, here I sit in California in March. It is beautiful outside (sorry to those of you who are still frozen in your ice caves in the Midwest) and here I sit blogging (where I am usually doing a heap of reading for classes so it's not like I usually get to enjoy the beautiful weather).

I feel a bit out of touch. I was just catching-up on some of the blogs I read (see the links to the right) and discovered that my alma mater's hockey season has drawn to a close. I wish I were more in touch with the pulse of the hockey season, but here in California, it's just not something that is important. When the games aren't on television it's hard for me to remember to check in on the results. I know, I'm a bad fan, but that's life.

I did catch the press conferences of the Brett Favre retirement. It truly is the end of an era. When I was in San Diego celebrating my 9th Wedding Anniversary recently, my wife and I saw a picture of Joe DiMaggio with a quote about how he played each game for the fans. I feel like that was Brett Favre in many ways, he did what he could to make the games fun to watch. I'm not sure there are a lot of players like that anymore. We hear a lot of complaint about how they are "underpaid" (yeah, that's what I think when I wonder if I can afford to buy my 10th vacation home) and how they "deserve" what they get. Whatever happened to the good ol' days when families could afford to go to games (baseball, hockey or otherwise) and watch a good event. Now it's just businesses that can afford the insanely high ticket prices!

I've also attempted to get in contact with people who I fell out of contact with by using this great new tool called Facebook. It's interesting. I don't know that I'm in any better contact with people, but at least some folks I hadn't heard from in years know I am still alive (and if they care to notice, they also know roughly where I live now, too).

In other out of touchness - when did Insurance agents stop being the person I go to when I need to make a claim? A friend borrowed my car yesterday and unfortunately it was broken into when she had it. The annoyance factor in this deal is quite high as she spent nearly 4 hours on the phone yesterday with different people trying to get the window repaired ... then today I spent another 2 hours. We still aren't sure whether or not someone will call to talk about the items that were stolen out of the car! Add to that a terrible experience with the Oakland Police Department ... let's just say unless it's a homicide they don't care.

Well, that's it for now ... hopefully y'all aren't as out of touch as I.

Lunch by the sea ...

2008-02-06T07:24:00.000-08:00

Those of you who know me know that I am a big fan of food. I know, most people like to eat, but I go beyond eating to really enjoy a variety of food experiences. I like fine dining and all of its strange rules. I like food at the ballpark and all of its simplicity. I like trying new recipes and I love cooking without a recipe and seeing what I can come up with.

With all of that said, it probably comes as no surprise that on my recent trip to the Holy Land I paid attention to the food. At it should also come as no surprise that when I had the chance to eat fish by the Sea of Galilee I jumped at it. After all, this is the very food that Jesus served to his disciples after the resurrection (see John 21). I wasn't very artistic with my picture (above) I wish I would have put the potato in a better place, but alas I can say I've eaten fish by the Sea of Galilee, just as Jesus Disciples did.

In other food related news about the Holy Land, it was wonderful to enjoy the Meditaranean diet. Our tour guide, Naim, shared with us the secret to a long healthy life ... "eat a few olives in the morning and a teaspoon of Olive Oil in the morning." Well, I wasn't going to disagree with him so I enjoyed some Olive Oil on bread in the morning and tried a few of the many varieties of olives that were laid out for us.

We were fed well while we were there (especially when we were at the International Center of Bethlehem Guest House). Dinner generally started with a soup (most often a broth or consome' of some variety) then a generous portion of meat and vegetables and often rice. May I add that they do some amazing things with rice. It's not the simple rice or rice with broth and seasonings that we get here in the U.S. They add things in to the rice like raisins and nuts. At first I would think "that doesn't sound real tasty" but they have a wonderful formula for adding just enough of something different to the rice to make it quite enjoyable. We ate chicken in a variety of fashions, we ate lamb (oh, how I enjoyed the lamb), we ate fish. All the while I ate these things I thought, "my doctor would be proud, the preparation on these dishes is so healthy" (of course most of my tour mates came away after about 4 days saying, "I just want a greasy hamburger or a steak" ... I'll leave the arterty-clogging for them and take the healthy food, myself.)

Breakfast might have been the most interesting experience while I was in the Holy Land. First of all, much like Europe and Australia, they did not serve orange juice as I know orange juice. I would describe what was served to us more as "Tang meets Orange Juice" it wasn't quite as sweet and syrupy as Sunny D, but it didn't strike me as being made from real oranges. I realize, I am spoiled by Tropicana Pure Premium, and yes, I drank my share of the "orange juice" but I was glad to get home and enjoy my glass of pulpy orange juice in the morning. There was always a pot of hot water in the morning giving us the chance to drink tea or coffee (instant coffee that is) I rarely imbibed in the hot beverages, as is my usual nature. In Bethlehem breakfast always included warm pita bread (yum), a foccacia type herb bread, varieties of cheeses, meat, olives, cucumbers, and hard boiled eggs. They also had this fabulous "spread" that was explained to us as "cream-cream" it tasted like a combination of yogurt and cream cheese with the consistency of sour cream. It was excellent! (I found the cream-cream at breakfast everywhere that we were). In Jerusalem we encountered most of the items we found in Bethlehem (though instead of pitas and foccacia-type bread, it was whole-wheat sandwich slices and these biscuit-hard-roll things that were quite tasty) then added scrambled eggs each morning and get this ... hot dogs! I never thought I would be excited to see hot dogs for breakfast, but I thought I would give them a try ... and they were quite good. The hot dogs were cut into bite-size pieces and sauteed with onions. I think the quote of the trip regarding food was "the hot dogs are surprisingly good."

When it came to lunch we didn't get to enjoy the local fare as much as I would have liked. Often our travels kept us out of the city at noontime thus limiting our options for eating. We often ate at "kibbutzs" which are Jewish collective settlements which often have a cafeteria. They did have a nice salad bar there, but the other entrees were less than exciting ... usually some version of what the U.S. south would call a "meat and three" where you get a meat entree (beef kabob, chicken, fish, schnitzel) and three side dishes (usually two vegetables and a starch). We did have the occassion to try some, of what I would call, more local fare a few times. Falafels! what an interesting food. Basically a combination of mashed chick peas and herbs and spices made into a ball, fried in olive oil and put inside a pita with "salad" ... quite enjoyable. Then there was the schwerma ... I would call it the Holy Land version of the gyro ... meat (which I found out is not always lamb, it can be chicken or beef) made into a "meatloaf" then grilled on the spit (much like gyro meat is) then sliced off thinly and put in a pita with "salad" ... quite tasty. We stopped at a bakery one day where we were offered breads that were baked with a variety of items in the middle (spinach, cheese, meat, mashed potato) the best thing about the bakery experience was the price ... a sandwich and drink for $1.50 U.S.dollars! Amazing!

On the bus between our various points we were often sharing snacks and treats that we picked-up various places. We had baklaava, which I quite enjoyed. We had nuts (almonds primarily). We had dried fruit. Now, here is a topic all its own, but let me just say I have never eaten as much dried fruit as I did when I was in the Holy Land. They dry everything and most of it is pretty good. I did stay away from the dried papaya and dried pineapple since my experience in the past has been that those items are really just sugar (and those that ate it in the Holy Land made the same comment about it). The one thing that surprised me were the dates! I had never really eaten dried dates by themselves (in things, yes ... alone, no). Interesting texture, chewy, sticky, kinda like a carmel ... and relatively tasty. The downside is the pit in the middle. Overall though, I couldn't eat a lot of them, just too much concentrated sweetness for my taste. Though, Naim told us that if you eat 5 dates, you don't have to eat again for 12 hours! I guess that would be helpful if you're stuck somewhere where you don't have much food, but happened to bring some dates along!

I can't say I really found any food that offended me while I was there (unlike Western Europe where they insist on leaving the head on shrimp and serving tripe) and much of it I found quite tasty and worth heading back for. If I would have had a bit more spending money, I would have come back with a collection of spices from the Holy Land. On my final day there, I ventured through some of the shops and came upon a spice shop. Tables and Tables of spices. Some mixed for various uses, others just the spice. Oh, I was in heaven. A brief chat with the shop owner about the use of some of the spices (and my fellow travelers with me making purchases, so I didn't feel guilty about not making purchases).

I wouldn't say I ate my way through the Holy Land, but I did indeed enjoy each culinary stop along the way.

Thankful to be home!

2008-01-30T08:08:00.000-08:00

At the end of many trips I've taken I've been thankful to arrive home, but this time I think I am the most thankful of all. In the last two weeks, I think I can honestly say that my world has been turned upside down, and that's a good thing. Here are some of the things I am most thankful for (on possibly a very superficial level):

1. Walking down the streets without seeing teenagers (18-19 years old) carrying automatic weapons ... sometimes holding them as though they will need to use them momentarily.

2. Not needing to carry my passport everywhere I go so that when we go through checkpoints (with same said 18-19 year olds as the guards) I can prove I am American and it's o.k. for me to go to the place I am headed.

3. Not having to travel with 22 other people! (it was a great group, but after two weeks I was ready to be able to spend more than my evenings alone).

4. Being able to put toilet paper in the toilet, and not the nearby trash can

I will miss certain things about my experience as well. It was nice to have someone clean my room each day, make meals for me, and take me everywhere I needed to go (if you ever get to the Holy Land, ask to have Walid as your driver, he's the best). I will miss the wonderful terrain of the Holy Land which changes drastically from one point to the next in less than a couple hundred kilometers. I will miss the impact that the things I won't miss had on my life and how grateful they make me for what I do have (how's that for a confusing sentence). I will also miss interacting with people who understand the experience that I had, because some of what I experienced is simply too difficult to share in words or pictures ... you simply had to be there.

I have to say that in some ways a trip to the Holy Land really destroys a lot of romantic notions that I had about the area. On some level, I assumed (as most Americans probably do) that I would get to places like the Mount of the Beatitudes and find a sign (or at least our guide) saying "here is where Jesus stood, this is where the people sat" but it isn't like that at all. At best, we have guesses of where some of these things happened. At worst, we (I'm using the royal "we" here because I'm sure at some level we all encourage this) have built shrines over where these things have happened.

I was quite annoyed, maybe even sickened, to see two of the places that I was most looking forward to. The birthplace of Christ (which is now covered by the Church of the Nativity) and Golgotha (which is covered by the church of the Holy Sepulchre). In both cases what torked me the most is that the shrines that have been built in these places have completely obscured what the place is. The place where Jesus was born is a cave ... with a few "rooms" but the walls of that cave are now covered in tapestries and there are all kinds of incense lanterns hanging in there, to the point where it doesn't look anything like a cave, it looks more like ... well, let's just say it's not anything I felt I wanted to take a picture of. Ditto on Golgotha ... I expected to see a hill or a mountain ... but instead, we were ushered into a HUGE church with stairs running every which way and people all over the places pushing ... we finally walked up some steep stairs to a "room" with a huge mosaic of Christ on the Cross, then a statue of Mary (which to many of us looked like one of those "fortune teller" machines from the carnival), and then an altar (surrounded again my lanterns and icons, and tapestries) which you could kneel at and put your arm through a whole in the floor to touch the rock of Golgotha ... but you couldn't see it at all!! UGH!!! From there we walked over to get in line near what was basically a "church within a church" this little chapel building, guarded over by some Eastern Orthodox Monk who let 4 people at a time into what is believed to be "the empty tomb" ... very interesting, but again, it looks nothing like a cave that they would have put a body in, it looks like a shrine, built to commemorate such an experience.

After all of my frustration though, I had a realization ... brought on by talking with others and then brought to point by our tour guide. "Isn't it great that we don't worship places?" our tour guide asked. "For if we worship places, some of you would be disappointed and may have lost faith. But we worship a living God, and Christ lives in our hearts." What a reminder ... going to those places was nice, but it doesn't shake what I believe ... it doesn't change the fact that I can look at everything in the world from the lens of the Empty Tomb ... Christ is Risen! Alleluia!

Notes from Bethlehem

2008-01-19T07:12:00.000-08:00

Greetings from Bethlehem.

It's been an interesting week. I had quite an experience in the airports along the way. My flights were enjoyable (at least as enjoyable of an experience as one can have wedged into a small seat for 11 hours). I love the fact that they feed you on the airplane for International flights, but it sure would be nice if they could figure out how to feed you meals that are more than "nourishing". Because of the crazy schedule I was on, I got to spend 10 hours in the Amsterdam Airport and then I got to spend 12 hours in the Tel Aviv airport waiting to meet up with my tour group.

Schipol airport (Amsterdam) is a fun airport, but I would say that 4-5 hours there would have been plenty. I guess it might have been more enjoyable had I slept the night before, but I couldn't sleep and decided to watch a whole list of movies on the "personal entertainment system" on the plane (License to Wed, Chicken Run, Over the Hedge, Super Bad -which lived up to its name- and The Prince of Egypt). Thinking about it now, I would definitely have rather gone and done something in the city ... my only concern when I was there was "I can get anywhere from the airport ... how do I get back to the airport?" I figured that depending on where I went there may not be a ready supply of taxis to take me back to the airport ... although at least in Amsterdam I could have made pretty good sense out of a bus map. When I got to Tel Aviv I spent time reading a book. When I met up with the tour guide in Tel Aviv (12 hours after I had gotten there) he seemed surprised that I didn't venture out somewhere and suggested that the tour planners should have given me his contact information and he would have sent me to see some good sites. Oh, well ... maybe next time.

We've been staying in Bethlehem at the Guest House of Christmas Lutheran Church. It is a wonderful place to stay. The staff are all very wonderful and hospitable. The rooms are nice, very clean and even with many modern amenities (like internet access nearby and television ... Yeah for watching BBC World - how come we don't get that channel in the U.S.?) We are fed very well. The breakfast spread includes a variety of breads, cheeses, and vegetables. Dinners generally include chicken (always cooked very moist) and are always more than generous in their portion. I've even had the chance to enjoy a few local beers ... pretty good, too.

Part of our time has been spent getting to meet with local ministry leaders. We met with Dr. Mitri Raheb who is pastor of Christmas Lutheran Church and also the director of a wide-reaching ministry here in Bethlehem that includes a School, Health and Wellness Center, and the guest house. It is wonderful to hear of his plans for the future ministries in this area ... he has such a great vision (given by God) for how to live out Christ's command to love one another. We met with Zoughbi Zoughbi who leads a ministry that raises up leaders in the community ... I appreciated his emphasis on hope that is tied to the Empty Tomb! We also spent some time in a Palestinian Refugee camp, while it was sad to see how the people lived with such substandard housing, it was amazing to see the hope in their lives (especially the children) as they report things getting "better" for them in the last few years. Still, there's a long way to go!

Part of our time has been spent in sightseeing (as Zoughbi put it, "seeing the Holy Stones"). It is absolutely amazing to see some of the places that we read about in the Bible and help put into perspective some of the places where people went. No, there are no places where we can say "Jesus slept here" or "this is THE Upper Room" but we can get a feeling for the geography and the distances. There is also room for imagination. What would it have been like to live here 2000 years ago?

We're not even halfway through our tour and there is so much I could say and yet so much still to see. I hear often of people who come to the Holy Land and "run where Jesus walked" and I can't imagine what that experience would be like. Our trip is even going to be too short, but we have had a chance to meet people and get to know their stories. We've had a chance to see some of the sadness that people live with every day. But most of all I will take with me the HOPE that these people all have. Dr. Mitri Raheb, when talking to our group, defined for us the difference between hope and optimism. He said, "I am not optimistic, for that would mean believing that tomorrow things will be better. But I am full for HOPE for that means that my actions today will make a difference in the future." For me his hope resonates with Zoughbi Zoughbi's words when asked, "how can you have hope when you see all that is going on around you?" And he replied quite simply, "There are 14 stations of the cross, and the final station is the Resurrection! The tomb is empty. How can I not have Hope?"

Packing, Bonhoeffer, Packers

2008-01-12T19:35:00.001-08:00

I would say it's been a good day. I started the day with a daunting list of tasks, but I've been able to chisel away at them all and accomplish the ones that I needed to finish.

First of all ... on my list of things to do was to watch the Packers womp the Seahawks. For those of you that were cheering for the Seahawks ... what were you thinking? When the Packers come to town, hometown pride has to go out the window. It was a joy to see the Packers for a change this season ... with their usually "early" starts conflicting with worship schedules, I'm usually lucky to catch a few minutes of the game. It was also a joy to watch the snow increase as the game went on ... ah, just like the good ol' days! That's one of the great things that football has over most other professional sports these days ... the element of Mother Nature! Although, I have to admit, it was weird to watch snow when it is very springlike outside.

Before enjoying the Packers, I decided to attend the "National Baby Shower" at a well-known Baby supply store. I've gotta say, I've not attended a lot of baby showers but this one was certainly a disappointment. Where was the food? Where were the gifts? Certainly not at the store ... but I did do some "looking" while there ... got some ideas for things that friends and family can buy for us!

For the last week, I have been immersed in Bonhoeffer's "Discipleship" What a pleasure. I enjoy Dietrich's writing, but more importantly I am inspired by the simplicity of what he is saying. I was annoyed at times that my classmates felt like the simplicity of Bonhoeffer was "idealistic" ... it seems like in a world where everything has to be complicated to be correct, a simple plan of following Jesus is lost in the message. I will continue to ponder my annoyance, maybe it's just that I'm a dreamer ... I just hope I'm not the only one ...

Well, I packed today ... for my trip ... leaving tomorrow morning ... for Israel. I'll be gone two weeks and am looking forward to it. As I've said before, you can put me on an airplane anywhere and I'll be happy, but this is the kind of trip I've been wanting to take for a while. I remember hearing stories of others who have gone to Israel and how amazing of an experience it was for them ... hopefully I can say the same. I'll of course take tons of pictures and hopefully share at least some of them via this blog ... and I'll offer to anyone reading ... if you want me to come do a presentation on Israel, if you put me on the plane ... I'll be there, pictures in hand!

So ... needless to say, I won't be posting for a while. I guess there's a chance of getting internet access while in Israel ... but paying by the hour, I doubt I'll take the time to update things here ... but you just never know.

Oh, Yeah! Van Halen Rocked!!!

2008-01-08T21:25:00.001-08:00

O.K. I am a slacker. I was supposed to post this post two weeks ago, but hey, I've been busy and well, there were more important things (like celebrating Christmas and sleeping).

Can I simply say that Yes, Van Halen still rocks!!

I admit, I had my reservations about spending money for tickets to see a band that hasn't released a full-length album in over 10 years. In general I've been the naysayer (who by the reviews often comes out right) who does not spend the money on the "bands of my youth" because I figure "they're past their prime". But I figured with Van Halen, I had to take my chances. I never got to see them when I was in high school ... the one time they came to the Minneapolis area (I think I was a Senior in High School) I didn't get to the box office (yes, that would have been pre-Internet when you had to go to the actual arena or another Ticketmaster location to buy tickets) in time and all that was left were "behind the stage" tickets ... and frankly, I don't pay to sit where I can't see ... I'll stay home and listen to the CD ... but I digress...

The concert rocked!

The opening act was Kymani Marley ... who was good, fun, interesting. Certainly had the Marley influence, but also had a nice mix of sounds ... and blessedly was not too loud (maybe it was the seats I was sitting in, Van Halen didn't seem ultra loud either). The opening set was short enough that I didn't get bored, but I did ask the question ... what happened to the days when you would get stoked for the opening band as much as the headliner (Mr. Big opening for Rush, Bad English opening for Whitesnake, O.K. so maybe none of those are bands I would be terribly stoked about anymore ... but I still have my Mr. Big t-shirt from 1990!)

Van Halen came out in standard rock star fashion ... dark arena, lights that make you wonder just where the band is coming from, then clues to where each person is, then full lights up on David Lee Roth waving a flag (o.k. so I didn't quite understand the flag thing, maybe he always wanted to be a cheerleader) but of course the trademark sound of Eddie's guitar caused an Eruption (oh, sorry, he didn't play that song until later). It was a two-hour extravaganza of the hits from the early years of Van Halen. The sounds that made the band famous and put Eddie on the cover of countless magazines!

I dug the drum solo ... while not quite as good as the one on "Live Without a Net" it was still Alex with the joy and exuberance of a teenager. His goofy monkey-like smile when he pulled off some of his moves. And talk about being rhythmically in time ... WOW ... even with some weird polyrhythmic exercises, he kept coming right back to the groove.

Of course Eddie was in rare form ... his fingers nimble flying up and down the fret board. I expected nothing less from him. His energy on stage was incredible. What more can you say than simply WOW that guy can play! I was a bit disappointed that he didn't bring out the keyboard to actually play Jump ... but I guess since he had to keep the guitar rockin' it would have been a real feat to do both on stage.

As for David Lee Roth ... well. I'm pleased he kept his shirt on (even if it was unbuttoned all the way). He was definitely the same sexual-innuendo driven Dave, but then what would anyone expect. Vocally he was on (though his voice seemed to tire a bit by the end of the show ... which is understandable, he was going strong for two hours). I could have done without his feeble acoustic guitar playing leading up to Ice Cream Man, but I appreciate that he played the part so that the rest of the band could kick in with full energy at just the right moment!

Woflgang ... hmmmm ... part of me wanted to see Michael Anthony just because he was the original band member ... but really, I didn't feel like he would have added anything that Wolfgang wasn't able to pull off. Wolfgang sure has the genes from Valerie, but that works for a 16 year old. He surely has the gift of music that runs in the family ... I had read that he was only playing bass 5 months ... that may be true, but from his style I could tell he's been playing guitar much longer. I will always remember Wolfgang's intro to Runnin' with the Devil ... those notes will continue to pulsate in me for a while.

Overall, what a great event ... now the question is ... while the boys of Van Halen ever reconcile with Sammy so they could tour and play the other half of the discography? The songs from 5150, ou812 and For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge? Yeah, I know, in the big picture there's not as much material there, but it still is the music of my youth and I would love to hear it performed live just once. Then after that, there's always the dream of Van Halen on tour with both Sammy and David (yeah, like that would ever happen) so they could perform a 3-hour marathon concert of the GREATEST hits beginning to end. Now, that I would pay the BIG bucks to see!

A New Year!

2008-01-04T19:55:00.000-08:00

Well, it's a New Year!

There's been a lot going on lately. For those of you that have been saying, "what's up" well, there's so much that I hope to include. First off, the pic above is with our new digital camera! That's right, we finally joined the digital age and hopefully I'll be able to update a few more photos of fun things (like sites from the Bay Area).

Since my last post ... I had a birthday. It was fun (I actually was awaken at 7:30 a.m. because of a dead battery in a vehicle ... not fun). I wrote about 42 pages of papers in two weeks (one of which allowed me to quote Yoda). I managed 4 weeks of Children's Theater productions (yes, I literally was herding cats). I celebrated Christmas in two states (the question is are those geographical or mental). Visited the snow-covered land of Minnesota (oh, how I miss winter in the Midwest ... well, except for the slushy roads that spray all over the car impairing vision).

Alright, a lot more happened, I saw my nieces and nephews, I watched a wonderful theatrical performance of A Christmas Carol, I rung in the New Year, I ate and ate and ate, but I digress. I want to add to a few of the highlights.

1. Eating Chinese on Christmas Eve is not all it's cracked-up to be. The plan was to grab a quick bite to eat between the two Christmas Eve services. The plan seemed easy enough, service at 7:30 and 11:00 pm left plenty of time between services ... except that in the wonderful Suburb of Concord, CA pretty much every restaurant closed by 9pm on Christmas Eve ... and they were in no mood to stay open a minute later for a few hungry wanderers (hey, c'mon, my wife is pregnant) so we drove until we found the welcoming neon glow of a Chinese Restaurant ... we had to laugh (especially with my obsession with A Christmas Story) we ordered up some Hunan Beef and Crispy Duck ... both fairly oily concoctions, but calories to keep us going.

2. Opening Christmas gifts is always a joy. Let's be honest, giving gifts is fun, but getting new things is even funner (yes, I know, funner is not a real word). I always have some list of things I really want but I'm always surprised when people come up with ideas that weren't on my list but still really cool. And as always, gift cards are fun ... I know, they aren't always the most personal gift ... but they travel well (try packing a full set of frying pans 8-13" in your suitcase) and you get to do one of my favorite things ... SHOP with someone else's money.

3. Traveling. I've said it before, I'll say it again. Put me on an airplane and I'll go anywhere. (proven by my job a few years ago that put me on a plane to Springfield, Illinois where every passenger commented, "this is definitely the smallest plane I've ever been on" ... of course I couldn't say that, but it certainly was the smallest commercial plane I'd been on). Traveling to see family is a bonus, but I just love the airport and airplanes. Yeah, there are the downsides, like the cranky people (but when I'm having a good experience, they are funny), sitting in the middle seat sucks (how nice I am to my pregnant wife). Eating in airports and trying to plan for long flights without food isn't much fun either (though, I have to say the Cheese Danish from Guava Java is worth every fattening calorie). And traveling to see family in Minnesota takes me to my favorite airport ... the Minneapolis/Saint Paul Lindbergh Terminal. Besides housing my favorite airline (Northwest) and having great shopping (tons of great Minnesota-themed shops) they have fun statues like the one pictured above of Snoopy the Flying Ace!

O.K. Enough of the life update ... oh, but I do need to add the detail that many of you are probably wondering about ... the expansion of our family. Yes, a baby is on the way due in May. We even went to an appointment yesterday where we got the skinny on the potential gender ... well, I'm not going to give you that information just yet ... I need to leave something to blog about in the upcoming weeks.

So, welcome to the New Year. I'm sure I've missed something that is important. Oh, like our registration at Babies-R-Us for baby. It was fun to shop with the scanner and pick out fun items, though it was a little daunting to think about all of the stuff that we need ... and where it will all come from (so folks whether you know us or not, we're happy to get a gift from you). I'll keep you posted on that stuff as the time gets closer (because for right now, the space is a bit prohibitive to store a bunch of extra stuff!

thankfulness at the Communion table

2007-12-04T23:37:00.000-08:00

So, as a seminary student, I spend time in a local church. Sometimes I do simple things like teach Confirmation class. Other times I deal with out of control 10-year-olds and try to keep them from killing each other. Other times I assist with worship ... Sunday was an assisting with worship day.

I have to say, it went pretty well. I sang the Kyrie (one of my favorite liturgical settings, Marty Haugen's Now the Feast and Celebration) though the accompanist played it a little slower than I would like, it went well (I don't normally sing in public mind you, especially not into a microphone as a solo). The service carried on and we got to Communion where I assisted by distributing the bread.

I've had a lot of experience assisting in communion and often I find it to be a meaningful experience. This time was no exception. As I walked around the altar sharing the bread, I noticed how different people reacted to receiving the bread. Some would look me in the eye as I shared the words "the body of Christ, broken for you" and I could see a little twinkle in their eye. Others would keep their heads bowed down, almost as if to say, "I'm not worthy of this gift." Still others had blank stares that made me wonder if they really find any meaning in the ritual of communion or if they simply do it because everyone else is.

I project these thoughts on these people because I myself have been in all of these positions at one time or another. Different seasons in life bring on different responses. But there was one response that I wasn't quite ready for ...

I approached a family and started handing the bread and I saw a 10 year old boy, one who was in that class that I had to keep from killing each other a few weeks back. When I handed him the bread, he said "Thank You" and my heart melted. What a wonderful response. Whether the response is to me or to Jesus, I don't know, but I stopped for a second to think that "Thank you" really is the correct response when we take Communion. We should be thankful for what Christ has done for us.

I've been thinking a lot lately about our reaction to God's gifts to us. I feel like often my reaction is not what it should be. It's not that it has to be complex, in most cases the simpler the response the better. Still, I seem to fail, because I fail to see the meaning in the simplicity. For me, this 10-year-old boy understood what I have spent a lifetime trying to understand ... that Christ gives us a gift at the Communion table and for that gift we should be thankful.

Adiaphora

2007-11-20T20:03:00.000-08:00

So, here we are in Thanksgiving Week and life continues to roll forward. I have to say I've had some interesting experiences in the last week or so. On Friday night I ventured out with some friends to San Francisco. We visited the neighborhoods known as "Little Italy" or "North Beach" and Chinatown. It was a grand evening ... I tasted things that I never knew I could find. I even ate a "Phily Cheesesteak" and ordered it with the "traditional" CheezWiz. (I confirmed with my friend Scott who is from Pennsylvania that indeed the "true" Phily Cheese is made with CheezWiz, not that provolone that I was introduced to in my Midwestern version of the sandwich).

So, today I got an interesting email from my mom asking if I could site any kind of theological standing for having natural plants in the altar area of a worship space. Oh, my. Now, that's the kind of thing that we should be studying here at seminary! See, the topic came up because apparently her church got a letter from the Fire Marshall reminding them of a law that states that churches cannot have live trees with lights on them (something to do with unattended buildings and fire hazards ... makes sense) so apparently there is a grand discussion happening that surrounds the issue. I guess the debate must be "Live Tree vs. Lights on Tree" and apparently people are camping on both sides. So, my final comment in my response to my mom was, I guess the real question is "which is more important, arguing about adiaphora or doing the work that Christ has called us to do?" Of course, the question got me thinking, so if anyone can come up with a solid theological reasoning for live plants/trees in altar areas, let me know. The best I could arrive at was that we could draw a metaphor between the "living plant" and the "Living Word" but I admit, that was quite a stretch ... I also commented that I'm pretty sure it was not something Luther ever wrote about in his 53 volumes now cataloged as Luther's Works, but I have to admit, I haven't read every page.

Well, in researching the topic, I came across a quiz that seemed fun ... it at least reminded me that I am Lutheran in my stance on the Eucharist ...

Eucharistic theology
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Luther

You are Martin Luther. You'll stick with the words of Scripture, and defend this with earthy expressions. You believe this is a necessary consequence of an orthodox Christology. You believe that the bread and wine are the Body and Blood of Christ, but aren't too sure about where he goes after the meal, and so you don't accept reservation of the Blessed Sacrament or Eucharistic devotions.

Luther

88%

Calvin

81%

Orthodox

75%

Zwingli

69%

Catholic

25%

Unitarian

13%

Well, I reckon that this post has certainly been enough adiaphora for now ... maybe more later in the week after I have thanked God for the many blessings showered on me and recovered from my early morning flight tomorrow.

Another step forward ...

2007-11-13T22:12:00.000-08:00

Well, friends. For those of you that are keeping score, I have made it one step closer to becoming a pastor. I'm sure most of you don't realize how many steps there are in this process. From the outside, it would seem like you make a decision to become a pastor, you get the degree, do the internship, and voila you start looking for that first call. Well, 'taint quite that easy. Along the way, there are several "checkpoints" where I get to write some essays in response to various theological questions (and some questions about my personal life) then I get to meet with some fine folks who have read the essay and they ask me questions and look for me to expand on ideas. I know, this all sounds confusing, if you want to get the real sense of the process, ask me privately and I'll give you all the details in enough detail to make sense.

The point of all of this is that I had my "Endorsement Interview" yesterday and it went quite well. The panel of three folks that spoke with me were in agreement that I should keep going in this process toward become a pastor. Their recommendation now goes to the full committee in January who will likely Endorse me. Yeah! That means I can move on to internship next year as planned.

In other fun and adventure lately, I had the opportunity to preach to my Teaching Parish this past Sunday. I have to admit, I wasn't thrilled about the text that I drew (Luke 20, story of the widow and 7 brothers) but I think I managed pretty well. Sadly, I left my stuffed animal (object of the children's sermon) at the church ... I hope she isn't too scared being there all alone. I'll pick her up and love her tomorrow when I am there for Education day.

I wish I could think of something deep and profound to add to my blog, but alas, my thoughts these days are consumed by classes and figuring out how to manage my time between reading, reading, going to class, reading, reading, attending and occasional meeting, reading, cleaning, reading, cooking, reading, and trying to stay sane. If you didn't catch the drift, there's a lot of reading going on right now. But I guess it's good for me.

I do have to offer my mid-season update of the Packers ... for those of you that haven't been following my favorite football team, now is the time to start. At 8-1 they are looking good. Now, I'm guessing my commenting in such a public way as this blog will surely jinx them and they will find ways to lose several games before the end of the season ... but I'm going to go with the confidence that they will keep winning ... all the way to the Super Bowl (I don't care if they win it, I would just like them to go ... thus making watching the game worth my while).

Other news will come in the next post or two ... there are some exciting things going on in the "house" but I want to hold you in suspense and give you a reason to keep reading. Maybe we'll even add a Jaguar to the family ... but that's only if it's a good runner!

Symbols from my youth ...

2007-11-02T11:27:00.000-07:00

I happened to be thinking the other day about some of the symbols from my youth. Yes, some of these might date me a little bit, but hey, it is what it is. I was thinking about characters like this Mr. Yuk who seemed to be everywhere, maybe they really weren't everywhere, maybe it just seemed like it because they were parts of my education. Mr. Yuk is older than me, though not by much. It's funny how much information you can learn about things via the internet if you really take the time in the midst of the day to do so. I learned that Mr. Yuk is actually a trademark of a hospital in Pittsburgh, and here all along I thought it was some National Poison Control symbol. Oh, well.

Now, here's one that I haven't thought of in a while. Woodsy Owl. Woodsy's famous slogan (at least during my era) was "Give a Hoot, Don't Pollute" Good slogan, seemed to put the message into my head. Though, I have to admit I've been a lot of places lately where they could use that slogan.

When I was in New York a few weeks ago, we walked along a roadside that seemed to be the collection place for all kinds of trash. Woodsy would have been very sad to see that roadside. It got me wondering if Woodsy is still "alive" at it seems that Woodsy is indeed readily available to visit your school or other organizational meeting. Click Here to learn more.

What I have found just a little ironic is a web page that talks about how to dispose of your old Woodsy Owl costumes. I didn't do enough research to find out if the problem is that the old costumes don't portray the right Woodsy anymore or if the problem is that they are tattered, but apparently the appropriate thing to do, According to the USDA Forest Service is to "1. Incinerate the complete costume with the oversight of an official USDA Forest Service law enforcement officer*.2. The entire Woodsy Owl costume including each of the separate pieces is to be destroyed beyond recognition." Now, am I crazy or does it seem like incinerating Woodsy Owl flies in the face of everything that Woodsy stands for?

Lately here in California there has been much discussion about Forest Fires. Let's face it, we haven't done real well with forest management lately. As I type, the fires are still burning in Southern California, though they are getting "under control". But this brings to mind one of my favorite characters from the past, and that is Smokey Bear.

I was actually thinking if I could find a Ranger hat that I would try to dress as Smokey for Halloween ... afterall, it's an easy costume, a pair of jeans, a ranger hat, and a shovel (I guess some boots, too). But then I thought that maybe it would be a bit too frightening if I were walking about with no shirt on, afterall, I do look a bit too much like Smokey (he doesn't have a 6-pack).

I think Smokey is probably one of the more commonly known characters from my past. I mean, who doesn't love a bear who tells you that "Only YOU can prevent forest fires?" That's partly a lot of responsibility, but partly a chance to do good. Hey, I haven't started any forest fires, so I'm at least living up to Smokey's expectations for my life.

One of my favorite memories about Smokey was being in First Grade and learning the "Smokey the Bear" song during Fire Prevention Week. I even found a copy of the song so that you can sing along (you may need to click on the image so it's large enough to read).

A little known fact is that prior to the song, Smokey's name was simply "Smokey Bear" but the songwriter needed an extra syllable, so the "the" was added in the middle. Since the song was so popular, people quickly came to know Smokey as "Smokey THE Bear" ... oh, well. What's in a name anyway?

All this bear talk got me thinking about another bear icon from my youth. The Hamm's Beer Bear. I haven't seen Hamm's beer on the shelf of a store in a long time (I think I bought it once when I was in college simply because of the nostalgia factor) it seems it is still sold, but only in select markets (I'm sure northern Minnesota is one of them).

I do have to say, though, that Hamm's is not nostaligic to me for the beer (yes, my Dad drank it and I'm sure I stole my share of "sips" from his bottle or can as a child) but what really makes it nostaligic is the commercials that they ran.

Thanks to YouTube I was able to relive a bunch of those memories. Seeing one or two of these makes it clear that outside of the current "ban on cartoons advertising alcohol" that some of these are less than politically correct, but they are nostalgic pieces of history and very much a part of my childhood. The Bud Light "Real Man of Genius" commercials have nothing on the Hamm's Beer Bear!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Cz3qITy-nE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hc7HoWEk6y8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zYzqrh-_UQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnUA5KWZVjc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EcIT0Tb5aEk

When did Customer Service stop Serving the Customer?

2007-10-26T15:58:00.000-07:00

Alright, I admit it. I am one to complain when things don't go the way I think they should go. Some will say that this comes from being the youngest sibling, I say it has to do with just wanting things to go the way they should and being willing to say something if they don't.

I spent today writing a lot of letters of complaint. Not because a lot of things went wrong today, but because today when one thing went wrong, it reminded of three other letters of complaint that I meant to write at the beginning of the month but didn't get around to. Hey, who says you have to complain right when the injustice is done? Sometimes time will give you perspective on a situation and remind you that some things aren't work complaining about. Other times, time will allow something to brew to the point where you point out every nit-picky little thing that went wrong and use that as fuel to ask for some really good compensation.

So, here's the story. Today I was booking flights for the Christmas holiday on my favorite airline. I received a certificate for $50 off my flight a few weeks ago and thought it was nice timing that I receive something like that when I can actually use it (usually I get those things and they expire the month before I would actually use them). So, I go online to book my flight (and one for my wife as well, since we would be traveling together it made sense to book us both together on the same flights) and when I enter the certificate information, the website says "no flights match that itinerary." Bull Crap! I looked just moments before and found the exact flight I wanted. So, I started reading the fine print on the certificate figuring there was something I was missing. Nothing! All of the seemingly exclusionary details didn't apply to the flight I wanted, black-out dates, flight class, price, everything seemed right.

Feeling somewhat defeated, I decided to go ahead and book the tickets and figured I could fit the battle with Customer Service. Surely they would see the error of the website and help me out. Well, I was pleased that Customer Service responded quickly to my concern (usually it takes 24-hours for an email to be returned, but this site said it would happen in less than 2 ... and it was more like 30 minutes!) but the response was anything but helpful (well, it was, just not the helpful I wanted). I was told the reason the certificate didn't work was that I could only book tickets individually with the certificate! That is STUPID! Why should I have to book tickets separately just because I'm using a certificate? I never did get an answer to THAT question! Well, I figured I could get Customer Service to serve me and "bend" the rules this once and just give me a refund of the $50 I over-spent ... no such luck. They were happy to tell me what I did wrong and how to fix the problem, but they were in no mood to actually resolve the situation for me. I mean, let's be honest here ... isn't it more work for me to have to cancel my purchase and re-purchase than for them to simply issue a credit for $50? Apparently not.

So, there I sat at my computer cancelling one set of tickets to simply re-book the SAME EXACT TICKETS minutes later. I even requested (and received) the same seats on the plane! But, I realized, 30 minutes of my time costs the airline nothing ... 30 minutes of their Customer Service Rep's time costs them something!

This then reminded me of the bad experience I had when I flew back to Oakland after having been in New York for an extended weekend. Arriving at the airport we were early (though I don't count it early when you hit the runway early, I count it early when you can actually get off the plane early) and there we sat on the tarmac for 30 minutes (now in my book, we were officially late at this point ... but I think the airline still counted us early ... afterall, the plane was on the ground in Oakland). We sat and waited ... and waited ... and waited. Finally we pulled up to the gate and we got off ... headed to baggage claim (which I am remembering is a fiasco at the Oakland airport) and there we stood and waited, and waited, and waited for our luggage. We waited for an hour with announcement of our luggage arriving. The LCD screens gave information on a variety of flights, but not ours! Finally, we ventured to the Customer Service desk (which in this part of the airport deals primarily with people who have lost baggage, so these are not happy people). I asked politely whether our luggage had arrived yet ... the woman looked at me and deadpan said, "that flight landed over an hour ago" ... No kidding? I was on that plane, that's why I'm asking. She then proceeded to tell me that the bags should have been delivered on the carousel but there may have been a delay due to the "security shutdown" ... what security shutdown? (I learned later the airport had been evacuated hours earlier due to a bomb scare ... a favorite pastime at the Oakland Airport). Well, I finally found our luggage ... no thanks to the Customer Service people who seemed to have all of the answers but didn't bother to share that information with any of the customers (who, like me, were standing confused waiting for their luggage).

Of course all of this was topped by the terrible experience we had at the Radisson hotel in New York. Now, I am pretty tolerant when it comes to hotels. I don't expect to get the Ritz on a Motel 6 budget, but when I pay over $100 per night for a hotel room, I have certain expectations of the type of room, safety, cleanliness, and service that I will be getting. Well, needless to say, the Radisson disappointed in most of those categories. Yeah, the place was clean (which does give it one star in my book) but beyond that, there was little to be excited about. The room was tiny. The "Sleep Number" beds were worse than camping with an air mattress. Housekeeping couldn't seem to get their job right (no clean glasses, incomplete towel sets, no refills on the shampoo, they didn't even vacuum the floor!) Service at the restaurant was worse ... when you walk into a restaurant and see 5 empty tables covered in dirty dishes, it should be a sign ... when you are ushered to the buffet without even a hint there is a menu, it should be a sign ... when you can't find a waiter to take your money, it's time to leave and never come back! Then to top things off, the hotel couldn't even provide a folio of charges at the end of our stay. They claimed that their computer was "running a report" and couldn't provide a statement. In the last 10 years I have never stayed at a hotel that didn't slip the statement under your door in the morning or provide it for you upon checkout ... something seemed fishy! Well, add to that the ride to the airport from the hotel shuttle where the driver seemed to enjoy the accelerator-to-the-floor-then-slam-on-the-brakes style of driving, I was about to lose my over-priced breakfast!

Alright, so you notice that I didn't mention the airline names in my ranting ... that's because overall, I still like the airlines that I flew. One more than the other, but I still like them. The Radisson, though, I don't recommend that to my enemies. I have to say that I've stayed at a handful of Radisson's in the last 5 years and they always seem to fall into that same category of "used to be nice, haven't been updated and now are over-priced with poor service" hotels that I would really rather not stay in!

So, what does all this have to do with Customer Service? Everything! Having once worked in that industry, I realize that it's not an easy job, but it's essential to any business. I realize that the point of customer service is to encourage people to continue to spend money with a company. So, how does a company do that? They listen to their customers. They make the customer's transactions simple. And if something is wrong, they endeavor to fix it, and hopefully without making the customer be the one to fix the problem.

Maybe I just expect too much from businesses, but I don't think so. I think businesses expect customers to put-up with too much poor service!

Is there anybody out there?

2007-10-22T14:20:00.000-07:00

O.K. As you may have read in my last post, I am feeling a bit of a slacker for not posting more regularly. Thankfully I didn't say I would try to do better, because I would have failed miserably and simply had to say again that I would try to do better ... so here I am typing those thoughts anyway, maybe that's what a blog is for, to type the thoughts you don't have to type. Hmmm ... ponder that a moment.

I realize that in the grand scope of blogging there are two pretty essential elements. The first is that I, the blogger, would post things of interest often enough that you, the reader, will read them. More than that, I would hope you would find my thoughts interesting enough that you will stop by regularly to see what new thoughts I might have. This does assume some level of arrogance I guess that I would have enough to say or enough interesting things to say that you would want to take precious time from your day to read them. Hmmm ... ponder that a moment.

Alright, so besides studying ... you might be wondering what I've been doing lately. Well, I won't bore you with all the details, but I will highlight that I've been keeping an on a television show that our good friends Jason and Danae got us hooked on ... it's Heroes. Have you seen it? If not, I suggest you only check it out if you have a lot of time on your hands. We ended up watching something like 15 hours of last season's shows on DVD prior to the season premiere. Now at first this doesn't sound so bad, but I also failed to mention those 15 hours were watched in two days! Yes, that's called obsessive, but the show is that compelling (either that we're that weak when it comes to saying, "no, I won't watch 15 hours of television"). If you are already obsessed, like me, then you can waste further hours taking quizzes like this one ...

Which Heroes Character are you? Your Result: Issac Mendez Isaac is very confused and upset about his powers in the beginning, but he eventually comes to terms with them as well as with his destiny. He provides a strong moral base that all the heroes can rely on. Isaac can paint the future.
Niki Sanders
Hiro Nakamura
Claire Bennet
Peter Petrelli
Nathan Petrelli
Matt Parkman
Jessica Sanders
Which Heroes Character are you? Make a Quiz

In other less than earth shattering news, I can't say I've been up to much. The usual reading, writing a paper or two. I did submit my application for internship which was quite a process. I've been working on the application for a few weeks now, answering a question or two as I had time and needed a distraction from other more important things. It's nice to have it done so I don't have to sweat the deadline for that.

I'm sure there are important things I could be writing about. Like the Green Bay Packers and their stellar season! It will probably be the last season in which I can write about Brett Favre and his athletic ability ... but then I've said that for a year or two now. I really think this will be the last season though, he's pretty much broken every record out there at this point and if this year's team doesn't win a Supper Bowl (which I'm not counting on, but wouldn't be upset if they did) then next year's won't be enough more likely that he should want to keep playing.

In my email inbox I've been saving a bunch of emails as thought starters for blogs, but I've now saved them for so long that I've forgotten what the thoughts are that they were supposed to start, so let me just say, so much for keeping notes!

In my final paragraph today, I would just like to ask the question from the title of this blog which hopefully is one that is near and dear to your hearts. Is there anybody out there? Does anyone actually read the wild ravings and crazy thoughts of this blog? I often wonder that and haven't really put any effort into finding any kind of tracking software to see what the answer to that question is (who knows, maybe it would be easier to track than I think). Are there topic you would like to see me rant about? Are there topics you would like to see me avoid all together (maybe like why I haven't written in a while, blah, blah, blah). I'm open to feedback, money, criticism, money, ideas, money, thoughts, money, travel vouchers, money ... have I mentioned that if you want to send me money for sharing my thoughts, I'm happy to take it ... or if you just want to send me money, that's o.k. too?

It's been far too long...

2007-10-10T21:53:00.000-07:00

I admit it, it has been way too long since my last post. I could give all kind of reasons for why I haven't posted a fresh blog in over a month, but alas it just hasn't been a priority of mine. I could even go on to say that I resolve to be better in the future, but I doubt that will be the case with my current slate of things to do.

In the last month I have made two trips to the East Coast. One for a retreat to Atlanta and a nice visit with a friend there. The other to New York for a wedding where we got to see lots of family, enjoy great food, and relax a tiny bit. In the last month I have also celebrated with friends, studied hard, written papers, taught Confirmation class, ate a lot of food, drank some drinks, washed clothes, led worship, and a bunch of other stuff I probably can't even think of but certainly will as soon as I click "post".

It is interesting how time seems to fly by at some points of the year. I was doing so well at posting thoughts and ideas for a while, but lately it just hasn't been on my mind. Maybe it's a good thing since I've had plenty of "important" things to do. Maybe I should be using this outlet for my thoughts and relaxation. I don't really know, but I know that it feels good to type some thoughts right now.

I wish I had more to say, something that matters, something that is deep and ponderous, but alas all I can say is, "it's been far too long since I last posted anything."

Now, it's time to watch Top Chef reunion (hey, we all have our vices).

The Unofficial End of Summer, and more

2007-09-08T08:48:00.000-07:00

Well, we all know that Labor Day marks the unofficial end of summer. Usually after the Labor Day holiday everyone heads back to school, the weather in most places begins to (if it hasn't already) turn toward autumn, and the days have noticeably less daylight.

I have to say that I really enjoyed the pace of my summer. I enjoyed the experiences that I had at Napa State Hospital. But I am glad to be moving into the autumn season. I do wish I had had another week to transition from "summer" into "autumn" but that's life I guess. I've found myself plunged into the world of academia and I'm not sure I'm quite ready for it, but here I go again with a lot of reading. At least this semester I am excited about my classes. I've not yet had a class that after the first meeting I don't look forward to going to the next meeting, now doing some of the assignments might be another issue altogether, but again, that's life.

Here in my world it has been interesting to mark time with many new neighbors moving in. One of the interesting things about life at a Lutheran Seminary is that each year brings a whole new mix of people. The only people I get to spend time with for more than one year are my classmates ... the people in the class one year ahead of me are off to internship (though this year, many of them are still living in the apartments because of spouses that are working in the area) the people that were on their internship last year are returning, but they've never met any of the people on campus now (except a few students who are staying a 5th year to work on another degree program). So here we are with a whole new dynamic, a whole new mindset on life, and after this year, that mindset and dynamic will not be the same again, the cycle continues, much like the seasons.

Even though summer leads to autumn every year, the transition is at a different time, a different intensity, and different memories are formed each year. As it's been said many times, the one thing that is constant in life is change. We have a choice then to embrace change, help drive it, be energized by it or we can stick our heads in the sand and ignore change, believe that things are as they always were, or simply say "it's not like the good ol' days." I choose the former with its optimism, its wonder and its possibilities. Summer may be over and the days may be getting shorter but the future is bright.

Get To Know Me ... Before You Judge Me

2007-08-16T21:09:00.001-07:00

Well, the summer is progressing rather rapidly. It's hard to believe that we are in the second half of August already. I've spent the last 8 weeks at Napa State Hospital enjoying a variety of experiences and learning an awful lot about myself in the process. My most recent learning experience is really something that I've been thinking about for most of the summer. It's the simple concept that is enclosed in the title of this blog, get to know me before you judge me.

The idea started back in the fall when my wife experienced Berkeley's "Critical Mass" when she was driving our Chevy Trailblazer through the city and was unable to proceed through an intersection because 50 bicyclists militantly took over the intersection yelling "park your car and ride a bike" and her response was, "I can't very well ride my bike 40 miles each day to where I work."

It seems like a simple and obvious comment, but the reality is that we don't practice it, any of us. I admit that I might be one of the worst offenders of this concept, but it is something that I'm working on. When I commute the 38 miles from Berkeley to Napa I find plenty of drivers that bring out my rage and my judgement of "you don't know how to drive!" But what do I know? Maybe if I got to understand who they are and what their issues are I would not curse them out for driving 55 mph in the left lane of the 65 mph freeway.

The reality of the statement however is this, we tend to assume we know about people from just seeing them. In other words, we judge the book by its cover. We have preconceived notions about people, how they should act and what they should do, because of limited information that we have about them.

Where this really came home for me was last week when I was talking with one of the individuals at Napa State, we were talking about his acclimating to Napa State and in the conversation he shared with me that he is working on his anti-relapse plan. In that discussion he shared how he prays regularly for his victims, he prays that God will heal them and allow them to live a "normal" life and be able to get beyond the fact that he sexually abused them.

I could sense in our conversation that this was a man who was remorseful for what he had done and was willing to pay his price to society. But, I sensed that there was more going on. What I sensed was his need for reassurance that God loves him and forgives him for what he did. At that point, I realized what Christ's love is really about ...

Christ calls us to look into the eyes of someone who sexually molested his nieces and say, "God forgives you and God Loves you. And because God loves you, I love you." It's not easy, but it's what we are called to do, not to judge people, but to love them.

Can't we all just get along?

2007-08-04T08:38:00.000-07:00

In combination between my summer at Napa State Hospital and my recent reading of my friend Jonathan's blog I have something to say to the world!

Why can't we all just get along?

It seems to me that we live in a society that is doing everything it can to separate itself and divide itself and find more and more excuses to say, "this is why I'm not like you." Even in my devotion this morning, the topic surrounded this idea of how we have this tendency to find ways to exclude the people around us.

Here's an example from my week at Napa State Hospital. I wear a badge that clearly identifies me as a "Chaplain Intern" so often the first question that I get when I talk to people is, "are you from the Protestant or Catholic chapel?" (I think they assume I'm not Jewish for a multitude of reasons). I always politely answer their question, but lately I have learned there is a follow-up quesiton that comes, "So, what's the difference between Protestants and Catholics?"

My answer has quickly become, "I prefer to focus on how we're similar rather than how we're different, afterall God doesn't care what we call our faith tradition." In most cases that will make the questioner say, "you make a good point" and that will be the end of that line of questioning.

I don't think we even know we're doing it, but we're asking quesitons like this to establish whether or not someone fits our "mold" and is similar enough to us for us to spend time with them. The darkly comedic (I can't use funny, though that was my first thought of a word to use) thing about this is that if we are the one being excluded, we get up in arms and chant "that's not fair, you shouldn't exclude me!" But too often we turn right around and do it to others.

I don't recall Jesus ever separating people into categories. When he was teaching and someone asked a question he didn't say, "now, you're a Levite, right? I can't answer that question for you." Nor did Jesus say, "I'll feed the 5000 as long as there are no Pharisees or tax collectors in the group." It sounds silly, but that's what we do.

Yes, there are things that make us different, but shouldn't we celebrate our diversity? Yes, we have similarities that make instant connections with some, but does that mean we will never get along with others? I even recall some guy named Paul who said something like, "there is no distinction any longer" (my paraphrase)

Man In the Mirror

2007-07-27T13:20:00.000-07:00

I'm sure if you are anything like me, you've looked at your image in the mirror thousands of times. Most of us stand in front of the mirror each morning and marvel at just how "bad" we look as we wipe the sleep from our eyes and try to get ourselves ready for whatever the day holds.

If we let the world's standards get a hold of us we worry about the pimple on our nose, the gray hair that appeared overnight, the sag in our cheeks. If it is a full-length mirror we focus on how fat we are and how we just don't look like we wished we looked (usually based on some model that we saw in a magazine or star that we saw on television).
I'm guessing that sometimes (maybe most times) we have a tendency to look in that mirror and look right past what we really see and instead focus on the image that we think we see. The same can be true when we look at our character. We often are looking in the fun house mirror that distorts our image of ourselves. We see the flaws exaggerated and the strengths minimized.

Part of my summer experience is self-evaluation and self-realization. I spend an hour each week with my supervisor talking about what I think I've learned in the past week (sometimes I am more accurate than other times). It is very unnatural for us to look at ourselves in this way, but it is also a good practice.

In this past week I realized that I don't always see myself the way others see me. I had one of the social workers ask my advice on how to handle a tough group that she was working with. What could I offer to her? Certainly she had been at this longer than I had. My supervisor pointed out that she felt she could trust me, that I would be, at the least, a sounding board for her. Hmmm ... I never thought of that. I always thought of trust as something that would come after a greater amount of time, I've maybe been in the same part of the Hospital as this social worker for 3 hours!

I also had the experience of meeting with an older gentleman who told me, "I get to know people by reading their faces." So I asked him what he read in mine and he replied, "You're a gentle, caring person who isn't going to take shit from anyone." Hmmm ... all of that came through my face, huh? Maybe he was just shining me on, but I want to think that he is pretty accurate.

When I look in the mirror, these are not the things I see. I see the receding hairline, the need for a shave, maybe a pimple that appeared over night, lines that are starting to form around my eyes (I guess they will become wrinkles at some point), but I don't see the trust or the love that others see. Maybe that's why we surround ourselves with other people, so they can show us what we don't see in ourselves.

Tour de Fat

2007-07-22T17:34:00.000-07:00

So, yesterday I experienced a first in my life. I rode in a bike event ... Tour de Fat. I call it an event because I'm frankly not quite sure what it really should be called. It is most definitely not a race (I was near the front of the pack the entire time, that would not be the case in a race, even a short one), I guess it was a benefit since money was being raised for two local bike organizations, I guess it was also an awareness event since there was a lot of discussion about eco-friendliness (or as they call it now "Green"). Nonetheless I rode in it, have the t-shirt to prove, and now am not afraid of doing something like that again (assuming it's not a race).

I found some photos from the event to post, but none really of the ride itself which I can't quite figure out there was no shortage of cameras (or interesting things to take photos of for that matter). I of course was negligent in bringing my own camera, but in my defense a clunky 35mm SLR is not the right camera to carry on a bike ride (so if you're thinking about a Christmas gift for me, oh, sorry shameless plugs come later).

Aside from being a good excuse to get out and ride my bike (because there was a beer tent at the end of the ride, thanks New Belgium Brewery) it was a good day of entertainment. As the website for the event describes it, "2 parts bike rodeo, 1 part circus" the circus part came in an afternoon of side-show style entertainment. There was a goofy trio that did juggling acts (including a chain-saw, bowling ball and egg routine), then there was a really great band called the Asylum Street Spankers that really rocked the park! (they were perfect for San Francisco since their music included drug references, anti-establishment references, and a country-bluegrass-rap feel to it). At this point I wisely decided that the sun had gotten enough of me and I should head home (I have the burn to prove that, too ... but I don't plan to document it through pictures or anything).

WWJD ... trite, but right

2007-07-18T19:13:00.001-07:00

I have to admit, I never jumped on the WWJD bandwagon in the early 90's when "everyone" was wearing these multi-colored bracelets and touting "What Would Jesus Do" as the answer to all of the problems in the world, but I think there is something powerful if we really take this message to heart.

For the past two days I have been in attendance at a Marginalized Ministry Conference. The attendees all are involved in some ministry to marginalized populations (go figure from the title). Some are involved in prisons, others mental hospitals, others homeless shelters. Part of the event is more-or-less group therapy for those that are in attendance. A chance to blow-off steam about their frustrations, to hear others empathize with their pain, and know they aren't alone in their struggles to care for those on the margins of society.

As you might expect there is some conversation about "how to make things better" and much of that conversation has centered around the concept of abolition of the current prison system. Frankly it's not working, there is a ridiculously high recidivism rate, the number of inmates keeps climbing, the costs are prohibitive, and even for the staff at such facilities life isn't good (one attendee mentioned that the average prison guard draws pension for 18 months ... that's not a long life-span after retirement).

As we discussed abolition of the current system one concept kept coming up: to love others. Why does love make such a difference? Think about it, if you love someone you want the best for them. If you love someone, you can forgive a lot more of the things they do. If you love someone, you see them as an individual not as a description (murderer, rapist, drug-addict). Certainly to love someone is easier said than done or is it?

A friend of mine always ends his sermons with the same line, "cling to your faith in the crucified and risen Christ. God loves you, and so do I." I always thought that was a great message, but I could never use it because I couldn't own it. I knew there were people that I couldn't bring myself to love, people that I just didn't like, people that rubbed me the wrong way.

I have spent a few weeks at Napa State Hospital when I arrive in the morning and park my car I say a prayer, "God you have brought me to this place at this time to love the people I encounter. Help me love them." In the few weeks I have been there I have met sex offenders and murderers and I can honestly say, I have loved them. I have put aside my prejudices and labels and sat with them and talked to them. I have learned they are humans in need of love, just like those of us who reside outside the walls of that facility.

I realized that my inability to love some people was really my fear, fear of what they would do to me if I loved them. Well, I have learned what happens when you love people, it softens your heart and provides room for more of God's love.

This past Sunday I preached on the story of the Good Samaritan and had an insight, the story of the Good Samaritan is set-up when one of Jesus' followers asks him, "what must I do to inherit eternal life" and Jesus responds, "love the lord your God with all [you are] ... and love your neighbor as yourself" then the man asks, "but who is my neighbor." This is where Jesus shares the story, but in doing so answers not the question of "who is my neighbor" but "how do I love with all that I am."

So we are faced with the question every day ... What Would Jesus Do? If we are to answer the question honestly we have to say simply, love. If we love, then we don't need the prisons and other institutions that are temples of our fear.

Extravagant Love

2007-07-14T09:33:00.000-07:00

I have now been at Napa State Hospital for my CPE program for three weeks. I'm feeling like I am getting into a bit of a groove there, although it seems like there is always something that is coming in the way of really getting into a routine (Independence Day, Conferences, etc). But that has not stopped me from having some really great experiences of insight into myself, my pastoral identity, and into the human race.

Recently I had a conversation with a man (I'll call him Jim to protect his identity, and thus keeping with HIPAA requirements) who is new to the facility. One of the reasons I was talking with Jim was that he learned that as he was being transported to Napa State his mother passed away. He said, "It's okay. Now we're both in a better place." Still, that doesn't put an end to his grief.

As Jim talked about his feelings and his grief over the loss of his mother and his sadness about his inability to attend the funeral (due to his commitment to Napa State) he started sharing a story about his mother. What follows is my recollection of that story, I hope I do it justice.

My mother was a kind and loving woman. I always knew love growing
up. I know that the reason I am here is because of choices I made, not
because of the home I grew up in. My mother was an artist and she used to
love to do watercolors of nature scenes. She loved nature and she always
seemed to notice the things that no one else noticed.

Our yard, when I was growing up, had huge trees in the backyard.
Our neighbor had these Palm trees put in that were full grown. One of
those trees must have dropped a seed near our trees and one day when I was out
marveling at how large our trees were my mom noticed this little palm tree
sapling in the ground. Most people would have trod over it and never
noticed it, but my mother not only noticed it, she nurtured it and took care of
it. As it got bigger she transplanted it to another area of the yard so
that it could get the sun that it needed and survive.

My mother did that with me, too. See, I am adopted. My
parents could not have children of their own so they looked for a child to
adopt. I don't know the story of my birth-mother, nor do I need to,
because my mom and dad found me, a little child not more than 6-months old and
took me into their home, cared for me, and loved me, and gave me the love that I
needed to grow up and be a good person.

Jim's mom really seemed to understand the extravagant love that Christ modeled for us. Jesus didn't discriminate when he died on the cross. He didn't discriminate in his ministry. In fact it was to the "least of these" that he focused his ministry. How often do we overlook the little saplings all around us in life focusing on the bigger, more impressive, mature trees? How often do we overlook the people that God is calling us to serve saying, "surely that is not the person, Lord."

As I spend my summer at Napa State Hospital, I see people that society has named as thief, murderer, and sex-offender. These descriptions are true of one aspect of who they are (or were), but I see in them the face of Christ. These are children of God, heirs of the heavenly promise, forgiven of their sins. These are the saplings that we are called to nurture and guide to maturity.

Privilege

2007-07-04T08:54:00.001-07:00

I've been spending my days at the place pictured above. Well, I have to admit, I haven't actually been in that building, but I know where it is on the campus of Napa State Hospital (no, it no longer carries the "for the insane" tag that you might read at the top of the photo). I will spend a total of 10 weeks there doing my Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE) basically, I am a chaplain for the summer.

A little background on Napa State Hospital. It is what they call a "Forensic Psychiatric Facility" in a nutshell, there are two parts to the facility, one where people are wards of the state and being treated for mental illness and the other for people who have either been found Not Guilty by reason of Mental Disease or Incompetent to Stand Trial. I spend some time with both groups.

On Monday, while I was eating my lunch (which is provided by the facility) I was realizing how many privileges that I have that I take for granted. My lunch consisted of a Turkey sandwich (over-processed turkey lunch meat, way too much mayonnaise, white bread), potato salad, and cucumber and onion salad. As things went, I couldn't bring myself to eat most of the sandwich, it was just too processed and coated with too much mayo. At that point I realized that I have the privilege to be picky about what I eat. Most of the individuals at Napa State do not have that same privilege (some do have money available that they can buy food from the canteen) and therefore have to eat what is put in front of them. Similarly there are plenty of people who are homeless or can't afford to put food on their tables that would have loved to eat what I had. And there I sat with the privilege to be picky about what I ate.

I know I complain from time to time about my lack of money to do the things I want to do (I think we all do), I complain about the inconvenience to me because I have to do extra work to get something I want, I complain that I have "nothing to wear", or I complain that "everyone" has it better than I do. Hopefully the next time I think of complaining this experience will be a good reminder to me that I really don't have it so bad. I can come and go as I please. I can wear whatever I want (the individuals in the secured section of the facility have lost that privilege and must dress in clothes that are all khaki).

I am reminded however of a privilege that is still afforded to the individuals at Napa State. That is, as the hymn tells us, the "privilege to carry everything to God in prayer." I think I might preach on this very subject when I have the opportunity to lead worship at Napa State. It is a wonderful piece of hope that exists in a place where many don't see much hope in their situation. The sad reality however is that many of us tend to take this privilege (or maybe gift is a better word) for granted too. We, as the hymn says, "forfeit our peace" and "bear needless pain" simply because we don't utilize the gift given to us.

The beautiful thing about the privilege of prayer is that God will never take it away.

Computer Dependent

2007-06-20T10:39:00.001-07:00

I would hate to think that this could ever happen to my computer. I treat my computer well, I run the proper maintenance programs, I even dust it periodically. Still, I found myself about ready to throw my computer out the window last week when the operating system became "compromised". I don't know exactly how such things happen, but it happened.

So, there I sat staring at my computer, wondering what to do, knowing full well that my usual "computer repair person" is gone for the summer. There is little more frustrating than staring at a computer with really no idea of what to do to fix it.

This brings to mind the idea of how dependent I've become on computers. I realized over this last week how much of my time is spent on a computer. I realize how often I turn to my computer to get information (I'll just google it) or turn to my computer for communication (yes, email is my communication medium) or turn for entertainment (hours of fun with EA Sports NHL).

The good thing in all of this is that the weather has been decent the last week so I've been able to get outside and get a good bike ride in on many days. Of course that comes with its own computer. I recently stopped by the bike shop to pick-up a "cyclocomputer" in order to better know how far I'm traveling and at what pace. Computers are all around us.

Think about an average day, computers are in everything. We drive cars that are operated by computers. We listen to radios that are nothing more than super-computers tuned to a specific use. We operate our microwave oven (ours has certain settings that you push one button and the microwave has a sensor in it that does the rest). We have remote controls for everything (we just bought a fan that has a remote control for it).

Yes, computers are all around us. It is fortunate that computers don't break-down more than they do. I remember back to Y2K and all of the hype around that, I keep thinking about what really would have happened had all of our computers come to a screeching halt, I'm pretty sure the world would have stopped! Ah well.

Google Thyself

2007-06-11T13:56:00.001-07:00

So it would seem that one of the greatest pieces of advice being shelled out to applicants of various types (job, internship, scholarship, university, etc) is to "google thyself". It seems that this is something that many admissions staff are doing as well as potential employers. Interesting stuff.

Have you ever googled yourself? I have. I probably google myself about once every 6 months, maybe a bit more often, just to see what the world is learning about me. I admit, one of the reasons that I have used a "pen name" for my blog is to make it a greater challenge for people who google me by my real name to find my writings. Not that I am in any way ashamed of what I write, I just figure it's best to leave a little bit of separation there.

In my most recent effort to google myself, I decided I should not only look into my real name, but also my pen-name. I was pleased to find that when I enter my pen-name RevDrum, I am in the top 8 items that are listed (and I haven't even by trying to maximize my Google exposure). Interestingly Google enquires whether I intended to type "rev drum" which with a space brings up a whole different list of items that are completely unrelated to me. I wish Google offered the option to say "nope, I know what I'm typing" but they don't, so life goes on without a sarcastic response to the computer.

I have to admit I was a little disappointed when I googled my real name (left out of this article for reasons mentioned above) that I didn't find "me" until 3 or 4 pages into the listings. Most of the listings are from quotes I have left somewhere on the Internet, in some cases quotes that I left years ago. I'm also listed on a few alumni lists in various places. Nothing really of substance, but then in Google's defense, I haven't really been doing anything of substance lately. I googled a few friends just to see what presence they have on the web. In some cases I found nothing and in other cases I discovered that my friends (or their children) are more famous than I thought!

I guess when it comes right down to it, I'm o.k. with my fairly anonymous existence in the world. Those that need to find me no where I am, those that want to find me usually can, and those that I am trying to avoid have hopefully been lost along the trail. When I do apply for jobs again, there's nothing tainting anyone's view of who I am or what I am about, that's good. I am sure that I will continue to google myself and others in the future, if nothing else so that the word google can remain a verb in the English language.

Is it the destination or the Journey?

2007-06-07T13:22:00.000-07:00

I have to admit that as I watched the Anaheim Ducks win the Stanley Cup last night I realized that they were the better team. Having watched the last few games of the Semi-Finals and the last two games of the Stanley Cup Finals, they just seemed better prepared and stronger. So I (reluctantly) tip my hat to the Ducks. I would have liked to see the Senators win, but alas it is best that the better team win, after all that is the point of such a championship battle.

As I pondered this Stanley Cup experience I got to thinking about the accomplishments that we attain in life, for example my recent vacation, and began to wonder if the goal is to be able to say "I've done it" or is the goal to love the journey along the way?

I think about my having traveled to a lot of different places and yes, it is fun to tell people some of the places I've been. But my purpose in travel has never been so that I can come home and add to my list, the purpose has been to experience those places.

I think this is the problem that we face when we are too busy trying to keep up with the Joneses. Too often we want more things, nicer things, newer things simply so that when we add up the score we can add our tally marks and end up with the biggest total in the end.

Well, this is exactly what Jesus was teaching against in his ministry. In Matthew 19:16-26, Jesus is approached by a rich young man and is questioned about what it takes to have eternal life. Most of us get caught in Jesus' instruction to sell everything and in the young man's grieved response. But I think the real key is at the tail end of verse 21 when Jesus says, "then come, follow me." For Jesus it seems to be about the journey. Finding the key to eternal life is not in obeying the commandments, it's not even in selling everything we own, it is in the journey that we are on when Jesus is leading.

I think for the Anaheim Ducks there is certainly joy in saying they are Stanley Cup Champions, but there is a greater joy in the journey that it took to get to that moment. The hours of practice, the bonding with teammates, learning from losses, experiencing wins.

Where are you in your journey? Are you busy looking for the next pinnacle to add to the list or are you enjoying where you are at along the way?

Vacation Photos...

2007-06-05T12:19:00.000-07:00

note: you can click on the images for bigger photos I admit it. I am still stuck in the "good ol' days" when it comes to taking pictures. 10 years ago when I was about to embark on a journey to Australia, I received a nice 35mm SLR camera for Christmas. It was a great gift and at the time the idea of digital photography was still on the horizon and the thought was, there is no way digital will replace film. Well, at the time the idea of a 1GB processor was also an absurd thought.

Well, I've continued to use my old standby 35mm SLR to take numerous photos. I even spent a chunk of money (enough to have bought a decent pocket digital) to get it repaired a year ago. Yes, I like my camera, its features, and like my blanket from my youth, I don't want to part with it just yet. In a recent trip I discovered some of the downsides to the 35mm SLR, the above photo is evidence to one of those downsides. That's a photo of Lake Ellery in Yosemite National Park, a photo I took in August of 2006 and just got developed now because I didn't finish the roll of film until my recent vacation.

What follow are photos from a recent trip to San Simeon, Monterey, and San Jose (all in California). I sort of jumped into the digital age and when I had my film developed I opted for the "digital photo CD" in addition to my prints. It's nice to have the digital option, but most of the photos weren't really worth it. A lot of the photos would have met the delete button on a digital camera for various reasons ... but here are some favorites ...

Above is Big Sur, California. I'm still a little unsure on exactly what the boundaries of Big Sur are. In different books I looked it the boundary ranged from a small town midway between Monterey and San Simeon to a general description of the area that is covered in that whole stretch. Either way, this gives you an idea of what the terrain is like, this photo was taken from a roadside stop on the very twisty, turny, Highway 1. Great fun for views, not so much fun when you're the driver (especially at night).

This next photo reveals one of my favorite "games" to play with a camera. Taking photos near still water and trying to capture the reflection to the point that you can't figure out which way is up or down unless you stare for quite a while at the photo. This happens to be a photo from the Hearst Castle in San Simeon of the Indoor Pool.

Of course there's a downside to this method of photography as well. Sometimes even I can't tell which way is supposed to be up and the place I took my film to have it developed didn't help much. When I opened the photo CD all of the images were turned upside down! The CD was supposed to have "photo editing software" with it, but the software they provided didn't allow me to save the photos after I modified them (I'm not sure what the software was good for) so I ended up downloading an Adobe Photo product and was able to at least turn the images the right direction before saving them. It shouldn't be this difficult!

On the day we visited Hearst Castle, it was a little foggy (a lot like the seminary campus most days) so we didn't get to see some of the amazing views, but we did get some interesting views like this one of the Hearst Tennis Court. Sometimes what you think is a bad thing (fog) turns out to be a good thing ...

As we drove back toward home, we spent a bit of time in the Monterey area and ventured on to what is called the 17-mile drive. You pay $9 to drive around a prestigious neighborhood and you get to look at Pebble Beach Golf Course (more on that in a minute). There are some nice views, like this one of the famous "Lone Cypress". This is the tree that became the corporate symbol for Pebble Beach.
And what would a visit to this area be without a chance to look out onto the 18th green. The club house itself is fairly un-exciting, just a block building (oh, sure they had a jazz combo playing in the lounge, but that's nothing to blog about) but the view is certainly amazing. What amazed me even more was the level of play of this group of guys on the course. Pebble Beach is a public course so anyone is welcome to play. The even had open tee times, so I considered it. That is, until I discovered the price tag of $475 a round! At that price, you would think you would be a pretty good player to be willing to shell out the money, not so.

This group of guys were probably among the biggest hacks I've seen on any course. Dirt flying every which way (and I didn't see them replace their divots) and the ball only seemed to travel short distances, but I guess they can say they played Pebble Beach!

The next day we ventured up through San Jose and stopped at the Winchester Mansion. If you are ever in San Jose, you have to make time to visit this place, it's a trip. The photo below is one that my dad took (mine is still on a roll of film that will probably be developed some time in 2008), it looks like a fairly normal house from the front, but there are about 165 rooms, with all kinds of odd things going on in them.

As the story goes, Sarah Winchester (who married into the Winchester Rifle family) built this house and continued construction on it for 35+ years to ward off the evil spirits of the people killed with Winchester rifles. There is a stairs that goes directly into the ceiling, doors that lead to nowhere, windows in the floor, and the list goes on. Talk about your eccentric people!

How to waste time on a Monday

2007-06-04T11:02:00.000-07:00

So, if you're looking to waste some time on Monday (or any day for that matter) here are a few links that can help you out ...

You Belong in San Francisco

You crave an eclectic, urban environment. You're half California, half NYC.
You're open minded, tolerant, and secretly think you're the best.
People may dismiss you as a hippie, but you're also progressive, interesting, and rich!

Where Does Your Inner Californian Belong?

You Are 72% A Child of the 80s

Not only did you experience the 80s... you are practically an expert.
You should be totally stoked!

Are You a Child of an 80s?

Your Travel Personality Is: The Adventurer

For you, travel is how you learn about the world. And you like to learn the stuff that's not in guidebooks.
You truly have wanderlust. When you're not traveling, you're dreaming about where you'll go next.
And your travels are truly legendary - they leave you with stories you'll be telling for the rest of your life!

What's Your Travel Personality?

Star Wars Horoscope for Sagittarius

You are superbly wise and have been known to spread your wisdom widely.
You are impatient and pushy when people take your teachings too lightly.
And your philosophical side always peeks through.
Star wars character you are most like: Yoda

What Is Your Star Wars Horoscope?

You Will Be a Cool Parent

You seem to naturally know a lot about parenting, and you know what kids need.
You can tell when it's time to let kids off the hook, and when it's time to lay down the law.
While your parenting is modern and hip, it's not over the top.
You know that there's nothing cool about a parent who acts like a teenager... or a drill sergeant!

Would You Be a Cool Parent?

Your Learning Style: Unconventional and Insightful

You are very intuitive and ingenious. You're attracted to any field of study that lets you break the rules.

You Should Study:

Art
Art history
Architecture
Comparative religions
Eastern religion
Education
Music
Philosophy

What Should You Study?

Weird Al Shares Your Taste in Music

See his whole playlist here (iTunes required)

Which Musician (or Group) Shares Your Taste in Music?

Beer and Baseball ... summer must be near

2007-06-01T17:52:00.000-07:00

I found myself looking for sports on television today. I thought the Stanley Cup Finals would be on, but alas, they are taking an extra day off, probably to assure a game to be played on a Saturday for higher television watching, I dunno. So, as I flipped through the channels I came across a college game with the University of Minnesota Golden Gophers. I felt a bit nostalgic for Minnesota and decided to leave the game on as I cleaned the house.

It seemed that I should have a beer in hand as I watched, something about beer and baseball that seem to go hand in hand. Maybe again its a nostalgia thing, not that I ever really spent a lot of time drinking beer when I watched baseball, but it seems to be the image that gets planted in my head.

I always wanted to be the guy flying through the air like the picture to the left. No, I never did get to make a catch like that and be the hero of a big game, but the dream still lives. Maybe if I ever find a softball team desperate enough for my lack of skill, I will once again have the chance to dive after a baseball (and hopefully not injure myself in the process).

I guess part of the problem with being the guy who dives after a ball like this is that you can't really do that with a beer in your hand (not without losing the beer anyway).

On the other hand, I feel like I have had the sensation that this player is experiencing. There's nothing quite like connecting with the sweet-spot of a ball and giving it a ride. I remember in 6th grade my team one first place in the league tournament due in part to me hitting a triple to win the game leading into the playoffs. No, I'm not exagerating, but likely no one else remembers the feeling of hitting that shoulder-high fastball down the left field line. Oh, well. I remember it and that's all that matters.

Then there was the time in college that I took Softball as a phy ed class. What a laugh, a class where you play softball for an hour and then at the end of the semester you take a "test" on the rules of the game. Yep, a good feeling when I stood in to the box and connected with that pitch. I really could feel that it was a home run when I hit it, there was simply something about the connection ... I watched the ball fly over the fence ... then I had to go get it!

O.K. So there's some connection that exists between baseball (softball) and beer. But I have to be honest, I've not seen too many people drinking good beer while playing softball. It usually ends up being one of the domestic-massed-produced-brews that ends up in the can held by ball players. Maybe it's partly because ball players choose cans over bottles and most good beers just don't come in cans.

Take for example my current favorite brew, the New Belgium Brewery 1554. It does not come in cans. I can't even find it in a 12-pack. It comes 6 bottles at a time and is worth the effort that it takes to carry more than one 6-pack into the house.

Another favorite brew is celebrating a birthday this year (well, I guess they celebrate a birthday every year, but this one is a bit more milestonish). Leinenkugel's Brewerey in Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin. I'm a bit bummed out that I won't be able to make the big celebration of the 140 years of brewing ... a big fun party with free brats! Yes, I miss the midwestern joy of grilling brats all summer and enjoying them with a good brew. There's something special about that experience, yes I can do the same here in California, but the good Johnsonville brats aren't available here (care package, please?)

O.K. speaking of summer traditions, baseball and beer. I've got one name that sums it all up, Harry Caray! He's been gone from this world a few years now, but he's not forgotten. As I was thinking about this wonderful match of beer and baseball, I recall many summer days of the Cubs on WGN and Harry Caray calling the games. There was something absolutely magic about the way he called a game. Maybe it was simply the fact that Harry cheered for the Cubs, Maybe it was the fact that he didn't take himself too seriously. I dunno, but I really enjoyed those games (much like I really enjoyed Minnesota Twins games with Herb Carneal who passed away this Spring)

Rumor has it that Harry enjoyed his share of brews. I guess that shouldn't come as a surprise when he did an ad for Budweiser, if you ever saw this ad, you'll never forget it. I just wish I could find a full version of the commercial somewhere.

And who could ever forget Harry singing Take Me Out to the Ballgame at any Cubs home game. I remember going to Wrigley field back before the lights, seeing a Cubs game in the sunlight and being sure that I was in my seat during the Seventh Inning Stretch so that I could witness Harry's singing live, nope it wasn't great singing, but it was fun and that's what mattered.

That's what summer is really about, having fun. Enjoying the sun, and making memories!

Power of Visions

2007-05-26T10:45:00.000-07:00

I admit, in my free time lately I have become a bit of a YouTube junky. When I first heard about YouTube, I thought, "that's nice, a way to share videos with people" and I didn't pay much attention. Then I had a professor in a class suggest that we should view YouTube videos as part of our "self-care" she commented how there is a lot of funny stuff out there and it would be good for us to take a break from our studies by laughing at some of the stuff that's out there.

I didn't really get into YouTube until a TA in one of my classes showed as a hilarious video about the way people misperceive Jesus from vintage21.com and I had to go looking for it. That was the beginning of the end. From that moment I discovered how easy it is to spend minutes, ok hours, on YouTube.

I rediscovered fun music videos from the past, like Michael W. Smith's Secret Ambition video. I had heard people talk about how powerful this video is, but had never myself seen it. Now that I've seen it I think that it was probably more powerful when it was originally produced in the 80's. I can't, myself, get past the idea that Michael W. Smith is walking in Jesus footsteps as if to say the song is as much about MWS as it is about Jesus (I know this is not the case having followed MWS and witnessing his ministry in a variety of settings) but it got me thinking about the power of visions. When I viewed the Secret Ambition video I also discovered a video that someone had created to the soundtrack of Rocketown another favorite of mine from the MWS discography (Secret Ambition is likely my favorite MWS song of all time).

As I watched the Rocketown video I realized that there is a power in the visuals that we match to music. I didn't feel like this person captured what I would have wanted to capture, but it was still powerful nonetheless. It reminded me of a "video" that I put together for Chris Rice's "Face of Christ" it was really less of a video as a PowerPoint presentation of still photos, but it was a powerful way to work with the words that Chris Rice recorded.

That thought led me into the idea of how songwriters have an incredible gift to paint pictures with their words. They are able to set a scene and tell a story usually in less than 4 minutes. What a gift! I wonder how many songwriters ever thought their words and music would back up videos on a technology called YouTube? As I thought of this, I came across an incredible use of video images in a video created, I assume, by a church for a worship setting to the song Tell Me Again I admit being partial to Geoff Moore's songwriting, but this is probably one of the more moving videos I have found on YouTube.

Some other stuff that I found and will likely watch again includes:

Michael W. Smith's performance of the u2 song 40 ... I have to admit I'm not really a u2 fan, I'm slowly coming around to being able to listen to them on the radio (there's just something about the effects they use to record or something) and I am definitely a MWS fan, so this will probably seem biased, but I think MWS does a much better job of 40 than u2 does.

Third Day's new song, Cry to Jesus ... my favorite concert experience was Third Day and MWS on the Come Together Worship tour but this new song from Third Day really hits me. There's something about Mac Powell's vocal quality and lyrics that really reach to my core. Again, add to that the visual images of this video and it really makes a person stop and think. Another Third Day addition to the video ranks is God of Wonders o.k. so maybe it's not totally a Third Day thing, but what great images!

A couple of funny videos from Geoff Moore caught my attention. Evolution, Redefined has always bothered me a little because of the message of the song (c'mon, it's possible for evolution and creationism to co-exist) but I've always loved the hilarious teacher in the song, what a great voice. Then there's Home Run a rather cheesy premise in some ways followed by a cheesy video, but it makes me laugh, and it's Geoff Moore so I find myself watching it over and again.

There's a lot of other funny stuff out there. I hope from time to time to link various videos to this blog. You'll find a lot of them linked directly below the main post. Not always are the videos I find deep and meaningful, but I generally think that everything that I link to my page will have some significance, if you have a hard time seeing it, let me know and I'll reveal my thinking.

Oh, and if you haven't already become a YouTube addict, I suggest taking a week or two of vacation and dedicating some serious time to the wonder that is YouTube.

Be Like Jesus?

2007-05-25T09:59:00.000-07:00

I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the sharing of his sufferings by becoming like him in his death, if somehow I may attain the resurrection from the dead.
Not that I have already obtained this or have already reached the goal; but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Beloved, I do not consider that I have made it my own; but this one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on towards the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus.
-Philippians 3:10-14

If you've been reading my blog very long, you have found that I get a lot of my inspiration from my daily devotions, well, today is no different. I came across this passage from Philippians and I remembered that it is a passage that I used to use in the signature of my emails, however I used to only use the Philippians 3:13-14 "Beloved, I do not consider that I have made it my own; but this one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on towards the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus."

Even now I think those few verses contain a good message, I hope that for all of us, the goal is to press on toward the heavenly call of of God in Christ Jesus, but this morning I was convicted of what I was omitting when I quoted only those verses, maybe you noticed a phrase that made you say, "I'm not sure I quite want to do that" as you were reading the passage, let me highlight it for you.

In verses 10 & 11 Paul writes, "I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the sharing of his sufferings by becoming like him in his death, if somehow I may attain the resurrection from the dead." (emphasis mine).

What, become like Christ in his DEATH? No thanks, that's not quite what I signed up for. What good am I to anyone if I am dead? I could have hung my head and turned the other way. But, I remembered something that I learned in Sunday School years ago, something amazing about Jesus' death ... it wasn't final. In three days Christ rose again.

Then I remembered a little something about baptism. Luther writes in the Small Catechism, "What then is the significance of such a baptism with water? It signifies that the old person in us with all sins and evil desires is to be drowned and die through daily sorrow for sin and through repentance, and on the other hand that daily a new person is to come forth and rise up to live before God in righteousness and purity forever."

Suddenly Paul's desire is a little easier to swallow. In fact it easily becomes my desire as well. I don't want to live in my sin, I want my sinful self to die, so that I am not hindered in pressing on towards the goal.

Entitlement

2007-05-24T11:09:00.001-07:00

When did the word entitlement begin to take on such a bad connotation? It used to be that we could use the word entitlement to be a good thing ... if one pays the ticket fee at the box office, they are entitled to view a movie. It used to even say on some tickets "this ticket entitles the bearer to ..." but somehow in the last few years the word entitlement has begun to carry with it a considerable amount of baggage and negativity.

I discovered the other day when I was driving through downtown Oakland several examples of entitlement and why we use that word in a negative connotation.

Story 1. I am waiting at a traffic light (it was red in my direction). As a good driver, I was watching the cross traffic, noticing the light in the other direction turning yellow, then red. Making sure any on-coming cars were stopped (or slowing considerably) before considering to "go" when the light in my direction turned green. Just as the light turned green in my direction, three women ran across the road in front of me (did I mention this is a 4 lane road, so they ran in front of others as well). If this weren't enough, when they safely (because the cars all did as I did and stayed stopped, dumbfounded that anyone would be so stupid to cross a 4-lane road against the light) reached the other side, the woman in front of the group turned and gave all of the waiting cars the finger! No, no one honked at this group of law-breakers, still this woman seemed to send a clear signal, "I am entitled to cross the road when I want, where I want, and there's not a @#$%! thing you can do about it"

Story 2. Further along in the same trip, I was approaching another traffic light, I noticed it to be red for some time as I approached it and I could see that the light in the other direction was turning yellow ... so I slowed, but figured by the time I got to the light, it would be green. As the light turned green in my direction, a bicyclist traveling on the cross-street continued to ride at full-speed through the intersection. I can imagine the though in his head being, "it takes me a lot more effort to get going again from a stop than it does for that driver to use his brakes, so I'm just going to keep going, after all, my use of a bicycle entitles me to interpret the laws in a way most convenient to me."

Story 3. Yet further along the same trip, I was traveling down a one-way road when, to my surprise, coming straight at me was a bicyclist. Does he not know that he needs to follow the same traffic laws as cars? Possibly. More likely by the meandering way he was riding he was thinking, "this is the shortest route to where I need to go, I'm small enough to ride past the on-coming cars, so I'm going to do it, and they'll get out of my way."

Yes, I admit, there are times when I find myself in a similar situation of thinking that I can get away with things or that because I would otherwise be inconvenienced that I can do something I shouldn't, so it go me thinking is this sense of "entitlement" as a negative concept something that comes with Generation X or Generation Y ... and my answer is "NO" ... it's clearly something that is pervasive to our American culture. The culture that says, "I need to be first, so I'll do whatever it takes to get there."

This attitude of entitlement is not new. As I led a Bible Study last night, we talked about the parable of the laborers in the vineyard (Matthew 20:1-16) and how the laborers who had been there all day felt entitled to greater wages than those that worked for only an hour. We talked also about the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32) and how the younger son felt entitled to his inheritance before his father died, and the older son felt entitled to begrudge his younger brother because he squandered the inheritance. Still, Jesus teaches us a better way, and if we are called to be Christians in this day and age and in this culture, then we too must follow this better way. At the end of the parable of laborers in the vineyard, Jesus teaches simply, "the last shall be first and the first shall be last."

Clearly, we may feel entitled to be first, to do for us, but by doing so we end up last. If on the other hand we put others before us, serve them with a cheerful heart, and love our neighbor as ourselves, well, we may end up last in this world, but does that really matter?

Motives ...

2007-05-22T11:08:00.000-07:00

Well, a few weeks ago I read this line in a devotion: "Are you more concerned about following Jesus’ example, or telling everyone what example Jesus was trying to convey?" and I have been pondering the line ever since.

As a pastor in training, I have to admit that I sometimes fall into the latter camp of that question. I find myself thinking about how I can express the "true meaning" of the Gospel message and ways that can be done in worship, Bible Study, and the like. But when I read this sentence, I am convicted that the best way to convey Jesus' message is by following Jesus' example.

You can imagine that as a student I am often being evaluated on various things. One of the "classes" that I had this past semester is called "Teaching Parish" a chance to put the "rubber to the road" as it were and try things out in a congregational setting. For teaching parish I had to evaluate myself and then be evaluated by the Pastor and a committee of lay people. It was interesting to me to see the strengths that came up from those two evaluations, talking about my passion for leading by example. Hmmm ... I guess sometimes these things are in your blood and you don't necessarily always think about it.

I think back to living in Madison, Wisconsin and being told by people I worked with, "you're always so positive, why is that" and I didn't have an answer at the time ... but now I see that it is something that was infused in me, living the message of Christ.

Now, I don't say all of this to somehow make myself seem like I've somehow arrived. I assure you there are days when people would look at me and say "that's no example of Christ" or there are little things I do here and there that even make my own mind question my motives. But overall, I have subconsciously lived with the idea of following Jesus' example. My goal now is to make that subconscious conscious so that it can become fully subconscious again.

Witness to Change

2007-05-18T09:37:00.001-07:00

I have been witness to a lot of changes this year. Some of them are obvious changes, others of them are only there if you look at them. With the school year ending and many of us spending extra time together focusing on how good this year was, how far we have come since first meeting one another, it seems timely that the devotion I read this morning included the following quote: "It is so easy for us to keep people stuck in the place where we first encountered them. We remember where they were physically, emotionally, and spiritually in their journey. Hopefully we have continued to grow and change along the way, but we tend to forget that others will do the same." This devotion is based on Luke 4:14-22 where Jesus reads from Isaiah in the synagogue and after stating that the scripture has been fulfilled, the people say, "isn't this Joseph's son?"

We are quick to be like the people in the synagogue and reference people back to our original image of them. We like putting people in boxes so that we don't have to consider who they may be now (or who they have become).

I am no more reminded of this whenever I visit my 2-year old nephew. Since I don't live in the same city that he does it is often months between visits and each time he grows so much. His personality is developing. The games that I play to entertain him change. Now that I have another nephew and two nieces to add to the fold, I will see even more the ever-changing process that we go through.

Being a very visual person I started thinking of change with the idea of optical illusions as well. As you view the two pictures that I've posted here, you will begin to notice the illusion that comes from perspective. Often when I look at pictures like this I don't see the illusion at first, but once I see it, then I can't seem to go back to what I originally saw. I sometimes think that is more of a detriment. I like being able to measure the difference and see things as they once were, but knowing fully what they are now.

Be the change you wish to see in the World. -Gandhi

Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become. - Anonymous

Hockey

2007-05-15T19:52:00.000-07:00

I love the sport of hockey!

For anyone that knows me well, that should not be a statement of surprise. I played hockey for 9 years and some days I wish I would have played longer. The reality of course is that I wasn't that great of a player, but I probably would have been good enough to play on my high school team had I kept playing. I miss the sport, I admit that.

I vicariously live through the various teams that I cheer for and on occasion I even live vicariously through EA Sports hockey on my computer. Yes, I even created a player with my name and of course "top skills" for the game so that I could dominate the ice! Hey, why not live the dream?

I've been watching the Stanley Cup Finals this last week and I love it. I love the competitive nature of the sport, I love the physicality of it, I love the finesse of the sport. It's the best of all worlds. It is, in my opinion, the best sport in the world!

I have to admit that everyone I talk to says you have to have a particular team to cheer for, and I guess when it comes to the NHL my team is the Nashville Predators, but now that they are out of the playoffs, I find myself cheering for other teams. In some cases I cheer for the "best of the two" teams playing and sometimes I cheer for teams that others are cheering for (hey, I was all for the Rangers winning since that's my Father-In-Law's team, and subsequently my wife's team if she ever has to pick a team). Some people will say that if you cheer for a particular team that you have to cheer against certain other teams.

As a Predators fan I am supposed to be completely against the Detroit Red Wings, but I have to admit that I've been cheering for them to beat the Ducks. Maybe it's because the Ducks beat the Predators, but I think I've had a think for the Red Wings ever since the North Stars left Minnesota (thank Norm Green).

I admit, in some ways I am a fair-weather fan. I guess it's because I grew-up cheering for the North Stars, but when they got "sold" to Dallas, I had no team and found myself only ever cheering for the University of Minnesota Gophers. After all, the Gophers were on the television of my parent's home every Friday and Saturday night, and I could probably tell you any player that played there from the mid 80's through the early 90's.

When I went to college at Bemidji State University it was a no-brainer for the Beavers to become my team. After all, they were winning National Championships at the Division II level, and I had the privilege to be the play-by-play announcers for all of their games in the 1996-97 season! It was the coolest when I lived in Nashville that I could drive down to Huntsville, Alabama every year to watch "my" Beavers play ... and often watch them win against the Huntsville Chargers.

I often wonder if the Beavers played the Gophers who I would end up cheering for. I guess I would probably just hope for a good game and be happy no matter what the outcome. But if I had to cheer for one, it would be the Beavers, that's where I got my B.S. degree after all.

Back to the NHL ... I keep thinking about this year's Stanley Cup finals. I have been cheering for the Red Wings, I know I shouldn't, but something deep within me says I want them to win. I've grown up watching guys like Hasek and Chelios play and I would like to see them win one more Cup before they retire. I also have been cheering for the Ottawa Senators. Back in 1992 when they came into the NHL I bought their jersey figuring no one else would have one (that was back before "everyone" had their team's jersey). Part of me feels compelled to cheer for them.

For now, I can cheer for both of "my" teams. We'll see how this round turns out. Maybe I'll have a clear team to cheer for, but it looks like my "teams" might go up against each other. I guess then I can just be happy with the outcome and totally enjoy the Finals!

Full planes, Full Stomachs, Full Diapers

2007-05-15T15:04:00.000-07:00

I don't know who designs airplanes, but I can't imagine that they really think too much about the people who have to ride in them for multiple hours.

I guess part of the issue might be that they plan for planes to not be 100% full, but on the two flights I was on this past weekend, they were as full as can be.

If you've been in the coach section of an airplane recently you may have noticed the fact that they only give you about 17-inches of space from shoulder to shoulder. I don't know about you, but my shoulders are a little wider than 17-inches. So, if my shoulders are wider than 17 inches, the guy next to me has shoulders wider than 17-inches, and the person next to him has shoulders wider than 17 inches who loses? The person sitting in the middle seat, that's who! Making things worse is the fact that the person in the seat in front of me decided to recline his seat back, basically putting that seat in my lap. I've never really been claustrophobic, but I was starting to feel it on that flight!

But all of that flying was worth it! Arriving in Minnesota to see our new Nieces and Nephew was awesome. I got to hang-out with my 2-year-old nephew as well, he's a bundle of fun with more energy than I can imagine. The newborns are pretty cool, they sleep a lot and of course eat a lot and that means that they also fill their share of diapers.

Somehow I was able to get out of having to change any diapers all weekend, I guess maybe I was just in the right place at the right time.

Oh, I did some feeding of the babies, it was pretty easy because they were hungry and so putting the bottle near their mouth was all it took. On one or two occasions the bottle was not nearly enough to satisfy them, so we had to jump into a quick back-up plan to get another bottle ready fast while I tried to keep baby happy.

Of course the reason for our trip was for the Baptism of our new nieces and nephew. It was quite fun to be a part of that experience. When our 2-year-old nephew was baptized, that was
on Father's Day, so it was particular neat that on Mother's Day the newborns would be baptized.

The church that my brother's family attends does their baptism as a separate service only once a month, apparently due to the number of baptisms that the church does each month (often something like 15). At first I was kinda set-off by this because as a Lutheran, one of the most important parts of Baptism is being a community event where the community welcomes the child to the family of Christ and makes promises to the child. But, seeing how 15 baptisms a month could be quite a disruption to the flow of worship, it makes a lot of sense ... and when you have that many baptisms going on at once, it really makes for quite a nice service anyway.

So, due to having triplets, instead of the parents holding the baby for the baptism, each of the godparents got to hold one of the kids during the baptism ... so I got to hold my new nephew, Linus, while the pastor poured water and said prayers. That's the kind of thing that will stay with me for my whole life.

Of course, just as all good things, this weekend had to come to an end and on Monday I found

myself crammed on an airplane yet again (as a note, I can't remember the last time I was this far back on an airplane, usually I sit somewhere near the wing or in front, but this time we ended up in the second to last row of the plane). Before getting on the plane I found myself hungry, so I wandered to the food court area of the airport (actually I started for McDonald's hoping they were still serving breakfast, but no luck) hoping to find a Sbarro, but alas the Sbarro that was in the food court was no longer. It apparently was taken over by Famiglia Pizza which just didn't look as good. How sad. When I get a pizza craving it is usually for a certain kind of pizza, and in this case it was for Sbarro. I settled for California Pizza Kitchen which was alright, but not quite what I had in mind.

I'm hoping to get caught up on my blogging. I have a few great thoughts that I want to share, but I just haven't had a chance. So, that's my commitment for the next week, while I finish up my last papers of the semester and go to my last class on Thursday I hope to update y'all with the latest thoughts from my head.

And now, I must do the laundry.

Out of touch again ... and it won't be getting better

2007-05-07T18:45:00.000-07:00

Thank you for taking the time to read my ramblings. It's hard to believe that anyone would stop their life, even momentarily to read the few thoughts that spill from my head. I guess it could be that it's because I'm bad at personally keeping up with people lately.

Yes, I've been out of touch with the world for the last week. I discovered today that my NY Rangers are now out of the playoffs (now I don't have any team to particularly cheer for) so I'll be watching for good games for the rest of the playoffs. Of course, I won't get to enjoy as much of them as I would like as I find myself on the brink of finals and needing to finish up a few papers and projects before the end of the term (which is coming scarily fast). But I will be taking tonight off to rest and watch the Sharks game on Versus (my new fav tv channel)

In the last week, I again spent a chunk of time with a good group of teens at the Kids Take The Stage production of Guys and Dolls. It was a good week marked with some fun times, long hours, and a paycheck at the end!

In other news, I discovered that you do have to be a little careful about promoting yourself. Here's the story: as I send out emails, I include my blog address in the signature. You wouldn't think this to be a big deal, but the other night I sent an email to my Greek professor announcing that I wouldn't be in class. Well, being the kind of guy who is intrigued by blogs (apparently) he checked mine out ... normally this would not concern me, but I realized that the post that he would have read first (assuming he read the default post) had an off-hand comment about my secret desire that when I wake up some mornings I hope for Greek to be canceled. UGH!

Well, to clear the air, it's not the professor, it's the subject matter. I'm just not the kind of guy that does well understanding foreign languages. And frankly, I have learned quite a bit about Greek and how to use many tools that are available in order to best translate the language into English. So, mission accomplished Professor Pence!

A final note from Berkeley, It's FREAKIN' HOT here! No, not by "Australia-desert-130-in-the-shade" standards nor by Phoenix standards, but by "Berkeley is usually a place that cools off nicely at night for a good restful sleep" standards. Yesterday the mercury touched around 80 and inside this little apartment it must have been over 90 with the windows open and a fan blowing. Today, mercury is cruising up again and the interior is toasty one more time. Oddly it is coolest in the kitchen ... until I try to make dinner ... anyone for take-out?

Expectations

2007-04-30T10:21:00.000-07:00

I see that I am writing more posts each month. From the inception of this blog, I have incrementally added one post each month. I know, it's not really a big deal, but it's the kind of stuff that I notice (why I don't know, probably the same reason I memorize and retain useless knowledge but struggle to memorize Greek).

This morning I was inspired by a devotion that I get emailed to me. It's nice to sit down to the computer and have this time to stop, focus on God, and then attack the day. It doesn't always work that smoothly, but usually on Monday the first thing I do when I wake-up is check my email (secretly hoping for an email from my Greek professor that class is canceled for some reason). Here's a link to the devotion I read, "In Its Own Time"

What really struck me about this devotion was the perspective for all situations to not "be hung up on where it might go". It really caused me to think about a lot of things that I approach in life. I have clear expectations (even if I won't admit them) about pretty much everything I get myself into. I expect when I go to Hardee's (I guess it's Carl's Jr. here in California) that I will be able to get my "heart-attack-on-a-bun" (aka the Monster Burger). I expect when I go to a rock concert that it's going to be loud. You get the idea.

I think the idea is not so much that we shouldn't have expectations, but that we shouldn't be so stuck on them that we cry like a baby when things don't go our own way. I have experienced the negative side of this a lot when I visit churches. It seems like we all have expectations for what we expect to get from the church. We expect that the church will meet our needs. We expect that God will do things in our time. But we are reminded in Ecclesiastes, there is a time for everything; and the underlying message is that it may not always be our time.

I needed that message today, as I sleepily got ready to go to my Greek class; as I knew I would be getting a quiz, but wasn't sure exactly the quiz would be like; as I conversed with friends before and after class.

If I'm not hung up on where things might go, or another way it was put in the devotional I read, if I'm not "attached the outcome" I will approach the outcome more positively. Maybe it won't be what I expected, but it will be what God had planned.

Catching Up...

2007-04-23T18:04:00.000-07:00

Sadly my Predators didn't make it past round one of the Stanley Cup Playoffs, I feel somewhat to blame as I didn't have a chance to watch most of the games. My work this last week on the Kids Take The Stage production of Guys & Dolls prevented me from being able to tune in even though my Predators were playing the local favorite (alright, local only) NHL team, the San Jose Sharks. This means that I begin cheering against teams (as I type I am watching the Vancouver Canucks play the Dallas Stars ... I must cheer against the Stars).

I can still cheer for the New York Rangers since that is my in-law's team. When there is a face-off between the Predators and the Rangers I do pick the Pred's, but otherwise I can cheer for the Rangers.

It seems weird to be watching hockey in April (nearly May) but it will seem stranger when the finals roll around since those are in June (I think). But it doesn't seem as weird since the weather here in Berkeley is about the same year-round, so it's not like we've left winter behind and are still watching a winter sport in Spring ... or at least it doesn't feel like it.

I can't report that much else has been going through my head lately. Oh, there are the occasional thoughts, but nothing of note. I guess that's what happens when free time goes away.

Well, it's sunny and the hockey game is on ... I best get to my homework.

Busy Times

2007-04-18T09:28:00.000-07:00

I always love having an image to focus my blog entries around, but alas I've just been too busy lately to find the right image, so I guess I'll have to try to paint the pictures with words (which sometimes works but usually I'm too lazy to craft just the right combination of what are they adverbs, adjectives?).

The week following Easter is always a bit crazy as I try to recover from the busyness of the Holy Week / Easter festivities. In this particular instance it was also a chance for my wife to have a week off, and thus we did some fun things like going for a hike at a local park (with amazing trails that view the bay and the city) and head to the Oakland Zoo.

Now Zoos are something I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with. I love being able to go see all of the animals, but I hate it when they are cooped up in tiny spaces with little "reality" around them. The Oakland Zoo does a pretty good job with habitats although some of them (like the Meerkats) seemed a bit small. The downside of course to these habitats is that there are often too many places for the animals to hide, so I may not see my favorites. On this particular trip the Sun Bear was being a bit shy, the tigers and lions a bit sleepy (what else is new) and a few of the animals (I don't remember which) were just MIA (maybe they got moved out of the zoo?) There was an amazing number of giraffes though, so it was fun to watch them play follow the leader.

I always like particular animals at the zoo, especially Polar Bears ... but not every zoo has such creatures. So, it is theoretically fun to live in a place like the Bay Area where there are multiple zoos. Although, our visit to the San Francisco zoo was less desirable. While they are working on building habitats for the animals that are more "realistic" there are plenty of animals (lions for example) that still live in small cages where all they can do is pace back and forth on cement. One of these days we'll get down to the San Diego Zoo and experience one of the greatest zoos in America.

O.K. ... so the weekend was pretty busy. I started a limited term job with a company called Kids Take the Stage which is a children's theater company here in the East Bay. They are putting on productions of Guys & Dolls and I was hired as the Lead Deck Crew ... which means I spent much of Friday lifting lights, moving set pieces, and basically doing whatever the Stage Manager needed done but couldn't accomplish by himself. It's a really interesting company since most of the people that they hire are aspiring theater people and here I am, just a guy with a bit of high school theater experience and a love for the theater. My job has continued this week as we are in dress rehearsals and boy has it been fun. I get to wear a headset and listen in on all of the cues called for the show, move sets on the stage, and watch some decent actors play out their dreams.

Now, Sunday was certainly a highlight of the week for me as I had the chance to sit in with one of my favorite musicians, Jonathan Rundman, for a concert here in Berkeley. It's always a treat to hang-out with Jonathan and hear his music performed live. For a guy who plays with just a guitar he can really rock out, and the stories that he tells about his songs are always a treat as well. I especially like how he played to the Berkeley crowd by introducing two of his songs, "Dumb It Down" and "Closed Out...," as "protest songs".

As Jonathan notes on his blog one of the best parts of the night is the "after party" where we ended up at this little bistro on Solano Avenue. We actually intended to hit a pizza place over there, but apparently they close by 9:30 on Sunday nights, it was quite an adventure to find any place that was still open (surprisingly Berkeley is not a late-night town) but we fell into this place that was willing to stay open for us and it was well worth it. That little place had suddenly made the list of "places we have to take guests" I just hope we can find it again!

Alright, with a few papers to write this week, several hours of work at the theater, and yes, some classes to attend, I best not regale you with too many dull details of life, but I did want to include the aforementioned updates to keep you, my loyal reader, updated on life in Berkeley.

CHRIST IS RISEN!

2007-04-08T17:37:00.000-07:00

CHRIST IS RISEN INDEED!

This kid gets it. The joy, the jubilation that is Easter. The good news that Christ is risen! (I know, you're thinking that he's more excited about the joy that comes with finding an Easter egg, but I think you're wrong).

I have to admit, I didn't have the jubilation of this young man when I got out of bed at six o'clock this morning. I was pretty sure that my attitude was justified because Jesus rose with the sun, right? (I'm working on historical-theological evidence for that statement) Well, the sun wasn't up, so I had time to put on my celebration face.

There's some part of pastors, church musicians, youth directors, church workers, church volunteers, and pastors-to-be that allow us to work extra hours during Holy Week and Easter on details that put a smile on other's faces, but drive us to want to sleep for the next week to recover. Today was no exception.

This morning's worship was jubilant, the kids were in rare form (I watched one boy eat chocolate eggs, jelly beans, peeps, and whatever else he could find in his basket during the entire worship service ... I'd hate to be his parent, but then I watched his mother permit all of his consumption, so I guess she brought it on herself). Some of the little girls in their Easter dresses (though I didn't see any of the famous Easter bonnets). Some of the boys in suits that I'm pretty sure their parents bought for Easter with high hopes the child won't grow for at least another year or two so they get more use out of the suit.

All of this to celebrate the resurrection joy.

I have to admit, I find some solace in the somberness of Holy Week. It's a reflective time when I think a lot and it's fine to be there for a time. But, I live in the hope of the Risen Christ. In the joy that comes with knowing that when a group of women went to a tomb to find Jesus, there were only angels there saying, "Why do you look for the living among the dead?"

The dead. I got news this morning that one of the men that I delivered communion to a little while back passed away yesterday morning. I recall one of the great saints of a church I used to be a member of who passed away on Easter Sunday. I recall in both of these men a quiet smile, a quiet sense of the resurrection, a hope in what is to come, and Easter hope. I can see these two men and all the saints who have passed before us emphatically responding with us, "CHRIST IS RISEN INDEED!"

I have great memories of Easters gone by ... times when we would visit my grandparents and eat hard-boiled eggs in the fellowship hall after worship ... times when my grandma would find such joy in hiding eggs for all of us grand-kids to find (and the one time she hid an egg in the pocket of a jacket in her closet that none of us kids found, but she found a few weeks later) ... times when I would sneak an extra jelly bean (never the black or red ones though), milk chocolate egg, or other treat when "mom and dad weren't looking" (no, they couldn't hear the wrapper being unwrapped) ... times when we would sit down as a family to carve into the Easter ham with all the trimmings. All of these memories around the celebration that ...

CHRIST IS RISEN!

CHRIST IS RISEN INDEED!

Good Friday

2007-04-06T14:08:00.000-07:00

Visually I am often offended on Good Friday. I often find the artwork that is used by churches to be too tame, too mundane, and too polished. I find no meaning in artwork that masquerades as meaningful when it pictures a suffering Christ with little blood, with mild anguish on his face, with a sense of being tired not crushed by the blows of the whip, the weight of the cross, or the pain of denial of friends.

I have to admit, I really appreciated Mel Gibson's Passion of the Christ for that reason. Yes, it was graphic, gruesomegory and any other description you want to give it, but for me, it was real. It was the truth of what Jesus experienced. And I want to see that to remind me of what Jesus experienced on my behalf.

For me, Good Friday holds an important place in the story of Christ. It's not necessarily because of the obvious fact that Christ died on Good Friday, there's more to it than that. For me it is the moment, the darkest moment when things can really get no worse. The moment when nothing imagined could be colder, darker, more painful, or more lonely.

It's Friday, but Sunday's coming.

I recall a time when I was maybe 8 years old (I don't know exactly) and I attended the Good Friday service at my church. I don't recall the words that the pastor used, but I remember them having a profound affect on me. I remember crying my eyes out (and my mom asking what was wrong - and I don't know if I ever told her) and I remember through those tears thinking, "Jesus did this for me."

What a profound insight (yes, I'm proud of myself).

In that moment on Good Friday, as a young boy, I sat in the church knowing that the suffering of Christ was not for a faceless humanity, but that Christ died for me.

It was Friday, but Sunday's coming.

There is a hope in the moment. Yes, the hope is in the resurrection, in Easter, and this is the lens that we read the Good Friday story through today. But I also believe that Jesus held a hope on Good Friday. A trust, a love for humanity that said, "this suffering will not be in vain."

It's Friday, but Sunday's coming.

It is that hope that I celebrate and reflect on during this season.

I recall sitting in an arena in Dallas in 1991 hearing Tony Campolo share the very words, "It's Friday, but Sunday's coming." Campolo even wrote a book that shares this very story, a book that I treasure to this day, in that book he retells this story of an epic sermon he heard preached. The Sermon was framed around the lines ‘it’s Friday but Sunday’s coming!’

It was Friday;
it was Friday and my Jesus was dead on the cross.
But that was Friday and Sunday’s comin’!
It was Friday and Mary was cryin’ her eyes out.
The disciples were runnin’ in every direction,
like sheep without a Shepherd,
but that was Friday. Sunday’s comin’!

And so he said the Sermon continued, building in volume and power all the time.

It was Friday.
The cynics were lookin’ at the world and saying;
you can’t change anything.
But those cynics didn’t know it was Friday.
Sunday’s comin’!”

Tony recorded that the sermon reached such an excitement that when the preacher delivered the final, “It’s Friday!” the whole congregation roared back, “BUT SUNDAY’S COMIN’!”

It is my prayer that it is that meaning that fills us all this Good Friday.

Never enough to stay where I need to be ...

2007-04-04T11:07:00.000-07:00

This morning I was working on an assignment for my Ethics class, the assignment was to reflect on the "false identities" that keep us from being a disciple. As I began thinking and reflecting, I couldn't help but to focus on the unreal dreams that I had when I was younger, the dream of being an Olympic Hockey star (and of course scoring the winning goal), of being a famous television broadcaster, of being someone great and famous was always the goal, it was never enough to be good and unseen at what I did.

I have to admit in some ways that idea of wanting to be bigger and better continues to plague me. I want to be the one that everyone knows, I want to be the person standing in front of the crowd, I want to be the star.

All of this reflecting, reminded me of a song that was written by Duey Jolivette years ago. Duey was a quirky songwriter, often writing some pretty sappy stuff followed by some pretty ridiculous stuff, but always the kinds of songs that teens of my generation seemed to swallow up at Youth gatherings. The song in particular that rings with me today is called "My Part of the Story" so I leave you with the lyrics to ponder:

So many times I've thought I'd like to change the world

So many times I've wanted to play the lead

Caught in between who I am and wish to be

Trying to find where I'm content to be

So many times it seems my grass is not as green

So much time spent wasted wishing on a dream

But I look around and see there is a place for me

A part in the story that's written just for me

My part of the story may be small

And my part of the story may not have the curtain call

But when the story's done I know there is One

Who loves me as I am

So many times I've wanted a part that's not for me

Never enough to stay where I need to be

And when the story ends maybe few will know my name

But You don't need the fame to love me as I am

My part of the story may be small
And my part of the story may not have the curtain call
But when the story's done I know there is One
Who loves me as I am

Are things what they seem?

2007-04-02T12:55:00.000-07:00

I'm still recovering from the idea that it is April. Where did the month of March go? Where did February go for that matter? (I know where January went, it got buried in a pile of snow in Denver!) But seriously, does it really matter what month it is? Today feels about like yesterday, which feels about like the whole last week, so March feels like April and life goes on.

I was reflecting this morning on some recent conversations I have had. Specifically a conversation about Palm Sunday and the fact that this year it happened to fall on April 1, or as parts of the world would know it, April Fool's Day. The point of the conversation was this: "In Jesus' ministry," as my professor stated, "things are not quite as they seem." What a fertile ground for a great sermon (too bad I wasn't preaching).

The idea of this particular conversation was reflected in my devotions this morning when I read about one of the instances when Jesus was confronted by the Pharisees then told them a parable and they were quiet because they knew he was talking about them. They also knew in this moment that their preconceptions of who the Messiah would be might be a bit incorrect, they might have to accept the fact that Jesus is indeed the Messiah!

When my professor made the statement, I was on board. In the example of Palm Sunday, the people are expecting a great military ruler to ride in on a mighty horse and lead them to freedom, but instead (surprise, not quite what you expected) enters a humble Jesus on a donkey's colt (I guess in today's world that would be like expecting the President in his limo convoy but instead getting some dude driving a Ford Focus). What got me though was one student in class that just couldn't accept an analogy of Jesus and April Fool's Day. For this woman, April Fool's Day is associated with one thought and one thought only and that is "deceit" and she was completely unwilling to move on her idea of the day to make room for an analogy to Jesus. (I agree that Jesus was NOT about deceit, but I think the analogy is still a wonderful one).

For me, the beauty of the analogy is that April Fool's Day is a day when things are not as they appear. Yes, there are practical jokes. Yes, the point is often to make people look foolish. (I recall one of my favorite April Fool's Jokes when traveling with New Vision and we were led to a cemetery, long story, but a great memory). Jesus' ministry was NOT about practical jokes and making people look foolish. However ...

Jesus was not what the people expected, and Jesus is still not what we expect.

In this day, we expect a Jesus that caters to our needs, answers our self-serving prayers, and ordains the many actions that we do "in the name of Christ." but that is not Jesus at all. Jesus is an example of how we are supposed to live ... challenging authority when it doesn't make sense (or goes against a shared belief, ethic, or law), putting others before us, teaching with the use of language people understand. Jesus is a humble servant. Jesus is the forgiveness of our sins.

I dig the prayer that was included in my devotion this morning, please pray it with me now:

Lord, I have some doubts. I have some questions. I have my own expectations and you don't always fit into my views. But I'm willing to reconsider this. I don't want to miss you. I shouldn't try to dictate what you should do and how you should do it. Please help me understand that IT'S NOT ABOUT ME. If I'm blind to you, open my eyes. Thanks for thinking about me. Amen.

Guilty Pleasures

2007-03-27T15:55:00.000-07:00

Keep in mind, it's Spring Break, so I'm allowed to do less, very little, or even nothing. I am trying to make today "nothing" day, but I'm not sure my wife will let me get away with that (something about her wanting me to do the laundry ... there's always tomorrow for that).

This afternoon, I did find myself in front of the television enjoying an hour of Tom and Jerry, yes the classic cartoon that is sent to symphonic scores where Tom (the cat) never seems to tire of chasing Jerry (the mouse) who always seems to win the battle in the end (often with the assistance of Spike, the dog, or one of several other cameo characters that happen to drop by for the particular episode.

Even though the plot is predictable, and in some cases I know exactly what will happen, I find Tom and Jerry enjoyable. Yes, they can be a bit violent at times (it can't be too violent, I grew up on Tom and Jerry and I didn't end up as a mass-murderer) but overall they are quite enjoyable. I was pleased today to find Tom and Jerry working together to care for a baby because the teenage babysitter was much too busy talking on the phone with her friend to notice that the baby was wandering away. So, yes, maybe the plot often revolves around some sort of dysfunction and finds a way to make us laugh at it, but I will still defend Tom and Jerry, Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, and the other classics over any of today's cartoons.

Keeping with my food theme (of this week anyway) I was also recalling how my parents used to enjoy a beverage called a "Tom and Jerry" which I always thought was ironic, a drink named after a cartoon (o.k. maybe the cartoon was named after the drink ... no chance it is just coincidence). It was primarily a Christmas drink for my parents and they offered my brother and I the "non-alcoholic" version, which to me tasted terrible, I can't recall what it tasted like, but I know it was gross. I used to marvel at my parents' choice to drink the stuff, maybe the brandy and rum mixed into the concoction made the taste better, or at least made the drinker forget about the taste, but I couldn't figure out why they would sit and sip this disgusting concoction. I recall watching my parents make this drink ... it came in a wax-papered-tub, like sour cream, (keep in mind this would have been the early 80's) and the "batter", as the mix was called, had a consistency like meringue (something else I am not a huge fan of). A dollop of the batter into the mug, a bit of brandy and rum, then hot water on top. YUCK!

My parents used to contend that it was better than Egg Nog, so I wasn't introduced to that awful egg-drink until I was at my grandparents house and received a small glass. That's something else I just can't stomach. I guess I just wasn't made to drink eggs, that's all there is to it.

On to foods I was made to eat, I have found one of the greatest snack foods ever ...
Trader Joe's Reduced Guilt Potato Chip!
Yes, the marketing works, I don't feel near as guilty about sitting down and eating an entire bag of these chips, after all they have 33% less fat than regular potato chips. I know, that doesn't mean I'm supposed to eat the whole bag in one sitting, especially covered in a fat-laddened dip, but hey, I can't change human nature, so I just do what I do and feel less guilty about it.

For those of you unfortunate souls that don't have Trader Joe's near you, I suggest you write your local political representatives and get them doing something meaningful, like passing a law that every town needs a Trader Joe's. Now, you can't find all of your groceries at Trader Joe's, but you can find most of the staples, and really anything you can't find at Trader Joe's, you just don't need (you may want it, but you don't need it).

The shopping experience at Trader Joe's is not one for the faint of heart. It may just be this area, but I have yet to shop Trader Joe's when I could casually examine all of the products I wanted at my own pace without being asked to "excuse me" by at least 20 people (often half of them are the employees trying to stock shelves or help customers). You have to go in knowing what you want and grab it. This does make the first trip a bit daunting, but it's so worth it. The foods are generally organic or at least natural and "healthier" than most other mass-produced foods.

The worst part of the shopping experience at Trader Joe's is the check-out lane. Even when it's "less busy" they have cashiers at every lane and there are often lines at least 5 deep at each line (the express lane is notorious for having 10 people in it, and moving no faster than the other lanes, thus creating a false sense of "express") so it's always helpful to bring a book to read ... or if you're with someone, one of you should get in line when you get there, the other should go get everything, and by the time your cart is full, the person in line should be about ready to check-out.

I keep thinking I'm going to add some insightful theological bent to my ramblings, but so far that hasn't been happening. Maybe I'll change the description of my blog ... maybe I'll just be more intentional about what I write.

What's for Lunch?

2007-03-26T14:26:00.000-07:00

It's Spring Break week. For many college students that means a rush to the south to hang out on the beach and do things that you forget later (or wish you could forget later), but as a Graduate Student, there is a greater realization that such trips cost more than student loans will allow, so we try to stay a little closer to home. Some of my fellow students have ventured to places like Lake Tahoe for a few days to enjoy nature and live out of a car for a few days others have gone home (apparently not everyone has their permanent address here in Berkeley).

I had planned to head to Minnesota to visit my new Nephew and Nieces, but alas the airline was too full and there was not room to squeeze me on. So, here I sit in Berkeley, in the rain trying to figure out how to occupy my day without doing anything productive (yes, I will do productive things if I have to, but I'm trying to avoid it). Did I mention that it's raining? That means no non-productive but interesting endeavors like bike rides or walks to 7-Eleven to get a Slurpee (mmm ... Slurpee).

So here I sit, with thoughts of food on my head (after all, a guy has to eat) so I ventured to the refrigerator to find nourishment. Today I found two pieces of leftover french toast, turkey lunch meat, cheese ... BINGO ... I could make my version of one of my favorite sandwiches, the Monte Cristo (yes, I am the king of leftovers, I always thought that I would go on the Food Network and compete for such a title and win it easily, but I digress).

As I prepared my Monte Cristo, I had fond memories of eating this favorite sandwich at Houlihan's ... a restaurant that is not found in every city, so when we found one in Huntsville, Alabama after watching hockey (yes another long story) I indulged in this deep-fried ooey-gooey-ness. My version was clearly healthier than the Houlihan's version, it was about a quarter of the size, not deep fried, and made with organic whole grain bread, free range turkey, and organic cheese (ah, eating in Berkeley). I also felt a little sad knowing that the Monte Cristo had been removed from the Houlihan's menu, I guess health-consciousness got to the regulars of that establishment.

Speaking of less than healthy food experiences, I got to thinking about Twinkies. I don't know exactly how my mind jumped there (it could be the Spring Break influence) and with a bit of free time on my hands I searched the Internet to discover that the Twinkie seems to be the most "scientifically" researched food on the net. There is no shortage of college students who would do their "duty" to research the Twinkie in all of it's strangeness. Here's a brief list of some of what I found:
Twinkies Project
Twinkie Trivia
TwinkieHenge
Twinkie Failure Testing
Yes, the Twinkie, a sure symbol of America ... terrible for us, lasts forever. I can't remember the last time I ate a Twinkie. The mere thought of it makes my stomach turn a bit. I would guess the last time I ate a Twinkie was when I was working at Olson's Kwik Food Mart (and full service gas station) and was offered a "day old" Twinkie (which in itself is a hilarious concept) from "Hostess Bob". "Hostess Bob" was the delivery guy who came by twice a week to bring us the "fresh" Hostess products (again, a hilarious concept). Bob was a little bit of a guy, always wore a smile, always had an armful of Hostess products to share! I wonder what Hostess Bob is doing today ... I wonder if he's still delivering "everlasting pastries" to convenience stores in Minnesota or if he has moved on to something else.

Laundry Day

2007-03-20T17:09:00.000-07:00

Today was laundry day. When living in a place where you share a laundry room with others, it is always good to figure out the day to avoid and the day to do your laundry. Monday is certainly not the day to do laundry, everyone seems to like doing their laundry on Monday so I avoid it at all costs. On the other hand, Tuesday seems to be the day when no one does their laundry, so it works out well. Other days are hit and miss. But I digress.
I find that I have two least favorite parts of doing the laundry (beyond the fact that next to cleaning the house doing laundry in general is my least favorite activity - EVER) both parts come at the end of the process. One is ironing (I question the purpose of owning any clothing that needs to be ironed) and when I had to wear such clothes regularly I utilized the local "martinizer" to take care of that issue for me. The other issue is folding socks.

It's not that I want to throw all of my socks in a drawer and just pick them out, though that is sometimes tempting, but I hate the idea of having to sort through a pile of socks trying to find ones that match ... being the typical male that I am, most of my socks are the typical white crew sock type so theoretically they are all the same, still somehow one seems to shrink slightly more or differently than the other.

I find this most disturbing, I wear my socks the same way. I put them on the same way and take them off the same way. I wash my socks the same way. Still, they come out of the dryer with one being slightly shorter, the other slightly narrower, one slightly whiter, I just don't get it.

Maybe I should spend some time researching this topic.

Worship Styles

2007-03-19T10:55:00.000-07:00

An old farmer went to the city one weekend and attended a big city church. He came home and his wife asked him how it was.

"Well," said the farmer, "it was good. They did some things differently though. They sang praise and worship choruses instead of hymns."

"Praise and worship choruses?" said his wife. "What are those?"

"Oh, they're okay. They're sort of like hymns, only different," said the farmer.

"Well, what's the difference?" asked his wife.

The farmer said, "Well, it's like this. If I were to say to you:
'Martha, the cows are in the corn' well, that would be a hymn.
If, on the other hand, I were to say to you:
Martha, Martha, Martha,
Oh, MARTHA, MARTHA, MARTHA,
the cows,
the big cows,
the brown cows,
the black cows,
the white cows,
the black and white cows,
the COWS, COWS, COWS,
are in the corn, are in the corn,
are in the corn, are in the corn,
the CORN, CORN, CORN.'
"Then if I were to repeat the whole thing 4 or 5 times and include guitar and drum solos, well that would be a praise chorus."

As luck would have it, the exact same Sunday, a young, new Christian from the city church attended the small country church. He came home and his wife asked him how it was.

"Well," said the young man, "it was good. They did some things differently though. They sang hymns instead of regular songs.."

"Hymns?" said the wife. "What are those?"

"Oh, they're okay. They're sort of like regular songs, only different." said the young man.

"Well, what's the difference?" asked his wife.

The young man said, "Well, it's like this. If I were to say to you:
'Martha, the cows are in the corn.' well, that would be a regular song.
If on the other hand, I were to say to you:
'Oh Martha, Dear Martha, hear thou my cry.
Inclinest thine ear to the words of my mouth.
Turn thou thy whole wondrous ear by and by
to the righteous, inimitable, glorious truth.
For the way of the animals - who can explain?
There in their heads is no shadow of sense,
hearkenest they in God's sun or his rain
unless from the mild, tempting corn they are fenced.
Yea those cows in glad bovine, rebellious delight
have broken free their shackles, their warm pens eschewed.
Then goaded by minions of darkness and night,
they all my mild sweet corn have chewed.
So look to that bright shining day by and by.
Where all foul corruptions of earth are reborn,
where no vicious animal makes my soul cry
and I no longer see those foul cows in the corn.
"Then, if I were to do only verses one, three, and four, well, that would be a hymn."

Carlin wii Cricket

2007-03-17T16:06:00.000-07:00

I've been doing some recreational reading lately on the advice of several people that said that as a student one of the best things that I can do is keep my mind in books that are not exclusively for class. Normally this causes a problem because I tend to read stuff for leisure that some would read for class (no, not the Greek New Testament).

So a few weeks ago I happened to be at Goodwill and browsing the book section when I came across this work by George Carlin. Yes, he's a bit crude and certainly sacreligious at best, but in the midst of that is some funny stuff that makes you think about the world differently.

I finished this most recent effort by Carlin the other night and I have to say while I found a lot of humorous bits I was rather annoyed that I never found the answer to when Jesus will bring the pork chops. I guess maybe that's what seminary is for.

Then last night, I'm hanging out with a friend who recently purchased a Nintendo Wii. Now, allow me to say that I'm not really up on all of the technology that is available in the world of video games, so I couldn't tell you what makes one system better than the next, but after a couple hours of hanging-out playing Wii I was hooked. (Glad I can't afford one, cuz it would be the death of my academic days).

I'm probably preaching to the choir, but for those that don't know or haven't heard about the Wii allow me to highlight just a few of its wonderful attributes. First, you get to create your own "Mii" which is a digital likeness of yourself. Though the characteristics are limited, you really can end up with an uncanny likeness of yourself. I think my wife was more impressed with hers than I was with mine (and she really doesn't like video game systems).

Once you've created a Mii, then you can play games. We started off with a nice game of tennis. The cool thing about the Wii is that you are actually doing the motions of the players ... so in the case of tennis I was really swinging a tennis racket motion. Pretty Cool! I guess part of the goal is to try to reverse the couch-potato trend that has come to America with the obsession over video games, so at least Nintendo can say it's doing its part to help keep America thin.

We moved from Tennis into some bizarre game called Wario Ware ... apparently it comes highly recommended. The crazy thing about Wario Ware is that you basically play a whole bunch of short games in quick succession. So, you might for example ...

... pop in grandma's dentures. Or there are games where you balance a broom on your hand, drive a car, swat a fly, save a falling person, etc. The thing is that usually before you have figured out exactly what to do, the time clock is nearly up. Still, hours of fun to be had by all, and not just the person playing ... it is hilarious for viewers as well. You can watch the happenings on the screen (our favorites were the disco cats) or you can watch the person playing make some pretty goofy looking poses. Yes, I suggest a Nintendo Wii for every house, just make sure you have enough room to really enjoy it!

After returning home at midnight from playing Wii I heard the most unusual sound outside the bedroom window. (To preface the story, our apartment overlooks an alley, well, really it's a greenway path, but who's counting.) There was this fairly regular sound of a ball hitting something solid, maybe a bat or a racket. I looked out the window and found three guys playing cricket in the alley! Now, I'm not opposed to the game of cricket, but it doesn't really strike me as the kind of game to be played at midnight in an alley, knowing full well that the people in the apartments overlooking the "playing field" might be wanting to sleep. Add to this rather odd scene, the conversation that was going on sounded to be in Hindi or another Middle-Eastern language. Ah, Berkeley, you just never know what experience you will have around the corner (or in your own backyard).

Our Daily Bread

2007-03-08T19:53:00.000-08:00

We ask panem quotidianem, our daily bread,
and God never says you should have come yesterday,
God never says you must come again tomorrow,
but today, if you will hear God's voice,
today God will hear you.

from Sermon at St. Paul's Christmas Day in the Evening 1640 by John Donne.

Some sentences set me off...

2007-02-27T15:28:00.000-08:00

It's been raining a bit lately, so I've been inside doing a lot of reading. It's a good thing to read, especially as a student who is assigned hundreds of pages a week of reading. It's easier to do the reading on days like today where it rains, and rains, and rains.

The other day I was reading a note in a church communication that really got under my skin, so much so that I stopped reading at that point and decided if there was anything else worth reading in that particular communication that I would read it another day. Here's the sentence that irked me:
The women's group in any church, should be and generally is the strongest group in the church community.
UGH! I can't believe that a church would allow such falsehood to be printed! Where has it ever been written that a women's group should be the strongest in a church community? Does the leadership of any church really believe this?

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm all for strong women's groups, and men's groups, and youth groups, but to value one group as being the "strongest" just sets me off. Is this not what Jesus came to abolish? It's no wonder that authors like David Murrow are writing books like "Why Men Hate Going to Church". If there really are supposed to be "stronger" ministries and power plays within a church community and such power plays are encouraged by the leadership of the congregation it's a wonder that anyone wants to be a part of the church any longer ... maybe that's why we are seeing declines in the membership of mainline churches, because we are allowing thinking like this to drive the ministry of our church.

What if we made statements like, "the service to our neighbors should be the strongest ministry in our church" now we're getting somewhere. Last I checked Jesus didn't come to pit one group against another, Jesus came as servant to all. I'm all for following that example.

It's a BIKE Lane!!!

2007-02-20T21:31:00.000-08:00

Had I seen a sign like this on Friday, I would be in a lot less pain than I am today, though the sign is not entirely accurate for my experience. Here's the story ...

It was a beautiful, sunny afternoon here in Berkeley perfect for a bike ride. So, my wife and I ventured out to one of the many trails that lead away from Berkeley along the bay ... yes it's a tough life living in this area ... as we rode along we encountered some oncoming cyclists and joggers. Now, the cyclists I can handle, afterall, it's a BIKE trail, but the joggers upset me a bit.

Yeah, I know they want a safe place to jog away from traffic, but certainly there are safer places to jog. Here was the kicker, up ahead of us I noticed a group of school-aged joggers coming at us. It really wouldn't have irked me as much, but I flashed back to the week before on a different trail where a school group was using the bike trail as their "track" and were running sprints in both lanes, toward oncoming cyclists and didn't seem to want to get out of the cyclist's way. At least this week the group wasn't sprinting in both lanes, but they were running in groups, some two across the oncoming lane (which was fun) but some three abreast forcing one of the runners into MY lane.

Now the first such group that we encountered had "smart" runners. I call them "smart" because the runner that was in our lane was "smart" enough to get out of our lane and fall in behind his friends, we passed happily and kept going. The next group apparently did not have "smart" runners as the runner in my lane decided to stay in the lane. Yes, that's right, with two bicyclists riding single-file toward him this teen-ager kept running toward us. O.K. here's where the story kicks into slow-motion because so much happened at the same time and much of it revolves around my thoughts.

I noticed my wife pass narrowly by the boy who had invaded our lane. My mind began thinking, "surely this teen-ager is going to get out of my way" I began to slow down my bike since there was a curb to my right that would have prohibited my using the grass to get around the invader. I noticed the oncoming boy looking as though he was trying to step in front of his friends, but he didn't make it in time, and just like the Batman shows of the 60's, "KABAM" I colided with this teenager.

As I fell to the ground, I had wonderful thoughts. As I felt my helmeted head hit the pavement, I thought "sure am glad I am wearing a helmet" then I felt my shoulder hit the pavement and I slid along the pavement a bit and I thought "sure am glad I am wearing long sleeves or I would be a real bloody mess" then my side hit the curb and I thought, "I wonder if I broke a rib or two, that's going to be painful" and finally the thought that brought me out of slow motion and back to the real world, "I definitely got the wind knocked-out of me, start breathing, start breathing!"

Well, you can tell by my typing this that I survived the incident, though even now several days later I have a bit of pain in my back, the feeling of a knot that prevents me from breathing as deeply as I would like or moving in ways that seem "natural". In some ways the "best" pain of all was last night when I sneezed and had this feeling like someone poked a finger sharply straight through my body, wow, what an incredible feeling of pain that I really would rather not have to re-live.

That's the story for today, I could go on and describe the road-rash that I got, the bruises I have, how on Saturday the microwave died, on Sunday we bought a new television and on Monday a new microwave (which was on an incredible sale), and today it was back to the usual flow of the day, study, go to class, study, study, study.

Why even watch?

2007-02-15T20:26:00.000-08:00

I don't know why I even watch the TV Guide Channel. O.K. I know ... it's because I want to know what's on T.V. But am I the only one that finds the "programming" on the TV Guide Channel to be completely and utterly annoyingly ridiculous?

I don't get why Joan and Melissa Rivers are entertaining. They annoy me, I have never wanted to destroy things as much in my life as when I see them on television. It doesn't stop there, though, all of the programming on the TV Guide Channel is inane and attempts to be funny but always seems to forget rule #1, if you have to explain it, it's not funny. Maybe I'm just missing the "sense of humour" gene that exists in today's culture. I don't find "The Office" funny and yet it wins awards and I hear people try to explain why it is funny. Rule #1, if you have to explain it, it's not funny.

I do have to laugh from time to time at the TV Guide Channel. When they show "commercials" for various programming that is coming up, 9 times out of 10 the audio doesn't match the video, so you'll be watching the video advertising the Da Vinci Code, but the audio is Joan Rivers explaining her latest plastic surgery. Now that is funny!

Let's talk funny for a moment, The Colbert Report, The Daily Show, My Name is Earl ... now that's humour! Why can't there be more shows like this on television. Maybe it's for the better, I do need an excuse to do my homework!

Have you watched this?

2007-02-12T20:43:00.000-08:00

Have you ever experienced the "deer in the headlights" experience when watching television?

I find this show to be one of those shows, no matter how hard I try to not watch it, it ends up on the t.v. and I end up watching the whole episode. But I also find that I start yelling at the show, "How can people really be this ignorant?"

The show seems to do a good job of revealing that no matter if you are a conservative or a liberal or somewhere in between, people can be thick-headed and closed-minded to views other than their own. Each episode has a formula ... two families one with rigid rules the other with hardly a rule; one family the kids want more freedom, the other family the kids want more time with their parents; one family the man doesn't help around the house at all; one family the woman is generally "Susie Homemaker".

In the end everyone ends up bending a little, despite their best intentions to "hold true to who they are". If only the whole world could learn this one little lesson.

I don't usually watch this show ... Really.

2007-02-02T16:59:00.000-08:00

I'm not usually a channel-surfer, I definitely don't watch Tyra Banks' talk show, but last night I found myself hooked by the show's introduction.

No, it wasn't because Tyra was standing there delivering her monologue in a bathing suit (though she was), it was because of the topic that Tyra was talking about.

If you've been watching the entertainment headlines lately, you may have seen pictures or heard about the "fat" photos of Tyra Banks. I personally could care less, but it brought to the front of her show a wonderful topic about the image that women are expected to portray in order to be considered "sexy" or "attractive".

I read an article in the St. Petersburg (Florida) Times at the beginning of January talking about how size "0" wasn't "small enough" for some women and how terrible this issue is. The issue at hand is how women keep trying to fit into smaller sizes because that's what "fashion" says is "in"

O.K. So this all ties together in the fact that I'm so excited to finally see a television program that is being real about telling people that it's o.k. to have a "normal" body. I agree that Americans are in general a bit overweight (I am a perfect example of that) and that we should aim to be healthier, but I also think that media images of rail-thin models are unreal and damaging to all of us.

It frustrates me that I try on clothing that is supposed to be an "XL" and it doesn't fit over my shoulders. As I noted earlier, I'm bigger than I could be, but on the scale of size, I shouldn't be too big for an XL. Ironically, I try on other clothes and a "Large" fits just fine. I guess this is a whole other issue about fashion and trying to make people "feel better" about themselves. But this gets at the real problem: that we aim to find our value in the clothes we wear when we should find our value in whose we are.

I was pleased to hear Tyra comment in her monlogue that she is "strong enough" and has a "good support system" so that she can "overcome these attacks". It is my hope and prayer that we can all be a support system to each other, to remind each other that we are created in God's image, and that when God created us God said, "it is good" (Genesis 1)

Passion

2007-01-31T08:31:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking about my experience at the Adaptive Leadership Academy in Denver. There is so much information to process and so many experiences to consider that I'll probably (hopefully) be thinking about that experience for a long time to come.

The word that came to mind this morning is PASSION. It is a word that is used in many different contexts and with many definitions. Interestingly during the keynote address from Rick Barger at the Academy, he mentioned that his son who is a "power consultant" in Corporate America has stated that the word PASSION is no longer the term to use when talking about someone's drive and desire for something, that the word has become meaningless, but as Rick mentioned, and I agree, there is no better word to use, especially in the church.

When I think of PASSION I think of excellence, people who can do nothing other than what they are doing, people who are willing to commit all of themselves to a project or vocation.

We all have passion for something. Unfortunately, for most people, passion is misplaced. It is directed to the things that don't really matter in life: bigger houses, newer cars, better seats at sporting events, more acquaintances (and ones who can increase our status), the newest technological toys, another television for another room in the house, I think you get the idea.

But then I meet people, like the people at Abiding Hope Lutheran Church and I see PASSION as it is meant to be: People who have a passion to make a difference in the lives of the less-fortunate (they donated over $250,000 to Haitian efforts in 2006 with plans to donate over $1 million to such efforts by 2010); People who worship God passionately and without worrying "what does my neighbor think of my worship practices"; People who open their homes to students for three weeks and share their lives with them; Adult men who cry openly because they see that God's plan for this world has been manipulated by us humans to serve our needs.

The church openly uses the word PASSION each year around Easter and this was made no more public than in Mel Gibson's movie, yet I think many of us Christians either miss or forget what the PASSION of Christ is really all about. Many get caught in the graphic nature of the crucifixion, many simply see a process that was necessary for the forgiveness of human sin, but I believe the PASSION refers to where Christ's heart is, where all of his efforts point: that each human being matters so much to him, not as nameless faces in a crowd, but in a personal relationship, that Jesus was willing to endure the pain and suffering in order that we might, as John 10:10 states, "have life and have it abundantly."

But there is something that many seem to overlook in the PASSION. Oh, we think about it on Easter Sunday, but we often fail to see that it is how we should live each day. The tomb is empty. Christ's PASSION doesn't end at the grave, but it rises with him and through the Holy Spirit it should live in us today. The love for others that focuses our efforts not on how to make ourselves better, but how to lift up the less fortunate.

This morning in my devotional time I was reading an excerpt from Martin Luther's commentary on "The Magnificat" in which Luther writes, "God's eyes look upon the lowly. The eyes of the world, on the contrary, look only above the lowly and are lifted up with pride. Even now and to the end of the world, all God's works are such that out of that which is nothing, worthless, despised, wretched, and dead, he makes that which is something, precious, honorable, blessed and living.

When we begin to live our lives realizing that the tomb is empty, our passions shift to the people that matter to God.

Home

2007-01-28T17:01:00.000-08:00

Well, after three weeks in Denver, I finally made it "home" to Berkeley on Thursday night. My travel wasn't without its adventures, sitting in the airport in Denver for three hours (because Southwest airlines doesn't let you fly standby on an earlier flight without paying a lot of extra money) so of course I found the bar in the terminal and enjoyed a local beer (something called Colorado Amber, nothing too exciting, no New Belgium, that's for sure). Once I got on the plane it wouldn't be a direct flight, so a stop in Las Vegas was necessary ... it's a crazy place to transfer planes. Large crowds of people waiting for planes, slot machines ringing in the background, and unfortunately a long wait at Sbarro, so I didn't get a chance to grab anything to eat. I did arrive in Oakland a bit early and event after waiting for my luggage (for what seemed like forever) I was able to catch AirBART and the BART in perfect timing (walked up to each of them just in time) and got to meet my lovely wife waiting for me at the North Berkeley BART station.

"Home" is an interesting concept for me anymore. I still think of "home" as Minnesota, I guess because I haven't lived anywhere else as long as I lived in Minnesota. But I also find myself using the word "home" to refer to anywhere I live. When I was in Denver I would refer to the house I stayed at as "going home for the night". Here in Berkeley I talk about our apartment as "home". When we lived in Tennessee, our house was most definitely a "home".

So what is home? Is it, as the old adage says, "where the heart is"? But if that is the case, then is home where your treasure is? (read Jesus words in Matthew, "for where your treasure is, there your heart is also") Is "home" a place, a state of being, a place with a certain relationship?

I can't say I have the answer to my question, but I do know that for now, I am "home" and getting ready for another semester of learning! Maybe part of that learning will be learning what "home" really is.

Perspective

2007-01-21T21:37:00.000-08:00

It's funny how perspective changes the way you look at things. Ten people can look at the same happening and none of them will look at it the same way. Take for example the weather. I'm hanging out in Denver currently where it snowed a light and fluffy beauty all day today. This on top of several feet of snow that has dropped down weekly over the past 5 weeks.

I look out the window and marvel at the beauty, how the snow lands peacefully on the tree branches, how it covers the dirty road, and how the animals quietly scamper across it outdoors. I enjoy the snow, I love the snow, I miss the snow (living in Tennessee the last 3 winters I didn't see much snow and it certainly didn't amount to much when it did come).

Compare to my view, the 10-year-old who lives in the house I am staying in. Her perspective is that it is cold out, but the snow would be great for sledding. She couldn't fathom why no one wanted to take her out sledding (I would have gone, but alas my winter-wear is in Minnesota, and I know better than to venture out in the snow without being properly dressed, plus football was on).

Compare that view to that of my hosts ... Jon was undecided about the snow, while he thought it was nice in appearance (especially from inside) he wasn't too excited to go out and shovel the driveway or sweep the deck. Lori on the other hand came in with a simple statement, "It's yucky outside".

Yes our perspective is tempered by many things and each of us looks at the world very differently. As I reflect on my last two weeks here in Denver studying at the Adaptive Leadership Academy I keep thinking about how it has molded my perspective for looking at the world, I will not see the church the same anymore and I think that's a good thing. I could say a lot about what I have learned but the biggest thing is this: What is, is. It's not good or bad, it just is. We have to accept realty and move forward, there is no sense in pointing fingers.

Giving This A Whirl

2007-01-19T15:24:00.000-08:00

Well, many people have told me that I should get into the world of blogging, and since I've had a little free time today, I thought I would give it a try and see what happens. Over the past weeks I have sent emails to friends thinking "gee, if I had a blog, I would post that thought there" but alas until today I didn't have a blog to post to and as such things often go, I have now forgotten what I wanted to type.

I have some old writings somewhere that might make it onto this blog over time, things that I thought were good at the time I wrote them, hopefully they still are. I am sure I will come up with new writings as time moves on and you'll get the joy of reading my thoughts. I may also use this as a way to keep people up on my life without having to annoy anyone with mass emails, you can just check in as you wish to see what I've been up to.

So far, I'm not too afraid of this blog thing, but as I learn more about it, I might get frightened, so please hold my hand and we'll walk on together.